The Apostle Paul said . . .

. . . "I permit no woman to teach or have authority over a man." (Full story.)

Random

I was looking at some files a second ago in the courthouse and looked up. It just kinda struck me. Lots of ghosts in this place. (Phone camera pic)

Forbes List of 20 Richest American Women In Entertainment (Who Aren't Pretty Much Retired)

1. Oprah Winfrey (sheer television anthrax) 2. J.K. Rowling (makes me sleepy to think about her life) 3. Martha Stewart (beats me down, but not as much lately) 4. Madonna (she scares me) 5. Celine Dion (That Las Vegas gig was a good idea) 6. Mariah Carey (Hot) 7. Janet Jackson (Still hot) 8. Julia Roberts (Overrated) 9. Jennifer Lopez (Triple Bootylicious) 10. Jennifer Aniston (Getting better with age) 11. The Olsen Twins (Luckiest girls in the history of ever) 12. Britney Spears (Train wreck. I love train wrecks) 13. Judge Judy (Sign the apocalypse is upon us) 14. Sandra Bullock (fading fast) 15. Cameron Diaz (ditto) 16. Gisele Bundchen (I'll admit I don't know who this is. Edit: I'm an idiot)) 17. Ellen DeGeneres (Ever seen that silly dancing stuff at the start of her show?) 18. Nicole Kidman (Disinterested) 19. Christina Aguilera (I think I'm responsible for her Wise County fame) 20. Renee Zellweger (I like this girl in the oddest of ways)

I'm Calling A Doctor

I walked up to the courthouse before lunch and found the town square relatively peaceful. For whatever reason, there weren't a bunch of cars fighting for parking spaces, I didn't see anyone else on the sidewalks, and the sky was a nicely overcast with brisk weather but with no wind. And then I walked by Sweetie Pie's Ribeyes (still the most confusing restaurant name in Wise County history), and heard the gentle tones of "Neon Moon" by Brook and Dunn. And I thought . . . . This is a pretty nice scene. Something is wrong with me. Definitely wrong.

Wee For Wii

You may have heard about the lady that died after drinking waaaaay too much water as part of a radio contest. (Info here) This link provides some audio excerpts of the contest (and the words will change on the screen to make it more interesting.) It's freaky how many times they joked about death before the contest.

Bringing Sexy Back?

In case you were wondering what goes on a Justin Timberlake concert, here ya go. That question had been bugging me. Edit: Sheesh, that may be Pink. I've got Confused Head. Source of confusion.

Odd Pic For Friday

As The Legislature . . .

. . . decides whether to honor Confederate Heroes Day, comes this gem from the NCAAP:

"To say that, to use Confederate with 'heroes' is an oxymoron," said Gary Bledsoe, president of the state NAACP office in Austin. "It's like using Nazi with hero. You just can't do that . . . their cause was immoral."

Source. And as you look at the photo, wouldn't you feel all warm and fuzzy if you were the head of NAACP?

Rhome Invades Poland

Rhome had its traffic/speeding cam out this morning - in a new place - under a bridge on the north side of town. Oddly, the mysterious white van that always seems to accompany it was no where to be seen.

It Would Drive Me Insane . . .

. . . to have my fate decided by others.

I Wonder Why Her Picture Is On Here?

Link.

No, Bono. No!

Wise County Tech

Most of us that pay property taxes have a mortgage company handle it, but for those that have to write a check, I was surprised to learn that you can pay your Wise County taxes online.

I Now Understand Tom Cruise

Link Edit: Oops. My bad.

Machinery Of Death

Lt. Governor and shameless media ho David Dewhurst has been pimping for the cameras lately (I think I just called him a pimp and a ho in the same sentence). His new cause: Death for repeat sex offenders. We know that the penalty of death for the rape of an adult woman is unconstitutional as being "cruel and unusual punishment." See Coker v. Georgia, 433 U.S. 584 (1977)(I feel so smart when I can throw out Supreme Court citations). But no one knows whether Dewhurst's proposed legislation is constitutional. Then again, I now see the face of the black man on the news yesterday who was finally exonerated, thanks to DNA, from his Dallas conviction of raping a 12 year old boy.

I Have No Idea What Possessed Me To Rant Like This

Warren Beatty received a lifetime achievement award at the Golden Globes the other night and then whipped our collective arses with a rambling acceptance speech. I think this guy is such a spare. You'd be hard press to name a decent movie he's been in (and if you have to go back to Bonnie and Clyde, which he should have received an award for over-acting, that ain't impressive.) But, man, does Hollywood worship the ground he walks on.

"Surge" Humor

That Was Quick

A couple of days ago, I mentioned there was a new sports talk radio station in town. Yesterday, I gave it a listen for the first time around noon - Richie Whitt and Mike Fisher talking sportzzzzz on 990 AM. It was good stuff. I flipped over there today briefly and got, uh, music. Bad music. And some static. It was not an accident. After three days, the station is dead in the water. And Richie Whit will tell you so - and he's a tad angry.

Trump Tower

Ivanka Trump.

The Rednecks Have Us In A Stranglehold, Baby

"AUSTIN - Hours after Gov. Rick Perry kicked off his second full term in office, rocker Ted Nugent helped him celebrate at a black-tie gala, but not all attendees were pleased by the performance. Using machine guns as props, Nugent appeared onstage as the final act of the inaugural ball wearing a cut-off T-shirt emblazoned with the Confederate flag and shouting offensive remarks about non-English speakers, according to people who were in attendance."

Story. (Picture is off the 'net but not of the actual event - but it sure could have been.)

So Wrong

I Couldn't Take My Eyes . . .

. . . off this reverse low rider at lunch.

Local News Hotties That Jazz Me

Rosie Has A Point - A Good Point

I didn't see it, but last night this went down on American Idol:

Simon said to the man, “You look a little odd. The dancing is terrible. The singing was horrendous and you look like one of those creatures that live in the jungle with those massive eyes. What do they call them? Bush babies.”

Paula calls Simon “sick” and tells the man that he was good and blah blah blah, but as soon as he leaves she starts laughing at him along with Simon and Randy.

And Rosie fires off this on The View this morning: “Isn’t that what America thinks is entertainment? To make fun of someone’s physical appearance and then when they leave the room laugh hysterically at them? Three millionaires, one probably intoxicated….”

Slickest Road In The History Of Ever

Snippets of this were on the news yesterday (it happened in Portland but it was broadcast nationwide). A full two minutes of carnage is captured on youtube.

A Special Evening With One Of The Greatest Presidents Ever

Scalpers are already wanting over $300 a ticket. Edit: It looks like some $200+ tickets are showing up.

One Week . . .

. . . after being linked to Girls Gone Wild creater Joe Francis, Linsday Lohan is headed to rehab. I hope Joe is OK.

Last Night . . .

. . . Texas and Oklahoma State battled into three overtimes before Oklahoma State won 105-103. You know why you haven't heard about it? Because college basketball is boring and no one cares. Heck, the Longhorns lost that game and probably had their guts ripped out which would normally* cause me to run naked through my neighborhood shouting with glee. But even I don't care. Let the Post Football Depression Season begin. _______ * Not to be confused with my average Saturday night.

Dallas ISD

Cat fight. It looks like there was some craziness this morning regarding Dallas ISD. First, the administration was dumb enough not to call off school and, in a dumber move, failed to issue an official statement of "We Are Open." Then things got more confusing when "a media outlet" announced that the school system would be closed. Come to find out that it was WFAA/Channel 8 that incorrectly announced that the Dallas ISD would be closed. Tonight, Channels 4 (already) and (presumably) Channels 5 and 11 will have a Happy Good Time pointing their collective fingers at BELO/WFAA/Channel 8.

Bend It Like

Last week's news was that David and Posh (Spice Girl) Beckham were coming to America. This week's news is that Borat won for Best Comedy at the Golden Globes. The actor behind Borat is also the actor behind Ali G. With that being said, let me link to all three of them in a pretty/very funny/shocking HBO-type-clip that I found on a different blog right here.

If This Blog Had A Library Card

Very Random Music Thought

The song "True" by Spandau Ballet won't go away. I really, really liked it when it came out in 1983, but I'm amazed at how it continues to show up. (You've heard it - proof here.) If you listen to any contemporary station right now (and this is what prompted me to start typing at this moment), it has raised its head again in the form of some song named "You" by somebody named "Lloyd." (I don't know, either.) But it's had second lives along the way. The song is the underlying beat in "Set Adrift on Memory Bliss" by P.M. Dawn and "N Dey Say" by Nelly. Both cool songs. Throw in its appearance in movies from "Sixteen Candles" to "The Wedding Singer" to "The Wedding Crashers" and it's a major pop culture player.

Six Feet Under

I just heard a rumor about a funeral home buyout in Wise County but I can't verify it. Developing . . . (Unless it was in today's Messenger which I haven't seen yet. If that's the case, uh, nevermind.)

R.I.P. Passions

NBC has announced that the soap opera Passions (which, based upon my limited Internet research, is one weird show) has been canceled. In its place will be a freakin' fourth hour of The Today Show. And to certainly cause my early death, this fourth hour will be hosted by Ann Curry and Al Roker. Since I'm drawn obsessively to things that drive me crazy, I'll be TIVO'ing it ever day. Ann, I'll be watching your every move. (As I have many, many times before.)

Not Me. Not Me. Not Me.

There are some press reports that Brit might be pregnant yet again. I doubt if it's true but I sooooo wanted to post this pic.

I Made It In To Work

. . . thanks to a sled, my trusty team of dogs, and a flask of whiskey. There are lots of bodies out there - this Arctic Blast II of 2007 has taken no prisoners. But I got a little carried away when I shook my fist at the heavens and proclaimed, "Hey, Wintery Mix! You can't touch me!"

Pete Delkus . . .

. . . is gaining enemies. Fast.

Idol Fans

I don't watch American Idol but if you do and you want to see the MySpace pages of some of last night contestants, someone has rounded them up for you.

Not Me! Not Me! Not Me!

Story.

Screenshot

. . . of the prediction for this morning's weather as shown by Fox 4 News last night. Nice job.

My Favorite Lines From The News This Morning

Channel 8's Cynthia Vega (who is on the street near Everman) said "It has truly been a lethal mix of sleet and snow." Fox 4's Tim Ryan said that he had "called home to speak with my child bride" to get a weather report. Genius.

School Delays? Closings

This is what I have found but it could change and my news team has confirmed it to be 100% accurate. Decatur ISD - Closed Bridgeport ISD - KXAS & KDFW now changed to"closed" Boyd ISD - Website shows "closed" (now confirmed at KXAS) Chico ISD - KXAS now changed to"closed" Alvord ISD - WFAA now changed to "closed" Paradise ISD - KXAS has updated to "closed" --------------------- To cause mass confusion, the Messenger Update reads this at 7:49 a.m.: BREAKING NEWS - SCHOOL CLOSINGS - Due to icy weather, the following schools are closed today: Decatur, Slidell and Northwest. Delayed: Chico until 10 a.m., Bridgeport until 10:30 a.m., Boyd until 10 a.m., Paradise until 10 a.m.. Edit: At 7:51 p.m., the Update had been, well, updated to show all Wise County schools as closed.

Enough Sports. Time To Appease My Tens Of Thousands of Female Fans

And Details magazine doesn't look that bad.

Cotton Bowl

As the Dallas City Council foolishly considers investing $50 million in upgrades of the Cotton Bowl, it is time to come to the realization that the stadium's days are numbered. The Cowboys' new stadium will open in about three years - it will be a showplace of showplaces - and the New Year's Day Game and the OU/Texas game will move there at the drop of the hat. I love the Cotton Bowl. I have a very vague memories of my parents taking me there when I was in elementary school to watch the Cowboys play the Green Bay Packers. I was just a junior high kid when I watched SMU and Houston play there (I took a bus with a bunch of other kids from the Bridgeport Methodist Church, but that's all I remember.) I was there when Baylor played Alabama in 1981 in the Cotton Bowl Classic - a disturbing loss. I went to other New Year's Day games just for the heck of it: A&M and Notre Dame, BYU and Kansas State (an 80 degree day), Oregon and Colorado (with an empty stadium in freezing weather), and Texas Tech vs. Alabama. I was there about six years ago when OU's Roy Williams hit UT's Chris Simms in the end zone as the game winning interception was thrown. And I was there with good friends in the late 1980s when we decided to watch a Carter High School playoff game simply because we had heard so much about them. But tradition is only tradition. And time moves on. Far too quickly.

Old Cowboy Fans . . .

. . . like me, check out this presentation on the NFL Network: Monday, Jan. 22, 7:30 p.m.: Super Bowl XIII, Pittsburgh Steelers vs. Dallas Cowboys; Announcers: Curt Gowdy, John Brodie and Merlin Olsen (NBC) That's not the glorified NFL Films crap, but a replay of the actual broadcast. It was my senior year in high school, and I watched the game with friends across the street at a neighbor's house. I was sick to my stomach after the game was over - I wish I still cared that much.

Video Fun

(1) Why do I think the typical Wise County resident would embrace the human slingshot and (2) the audio of this clip reminded me of my fourth wife.

You Think Your Life Is Going Badly?

Memorabilia for Colts Cowboys ex-NFL kicker Mike Vanderjagt is not held in high regard.

Oh, You Didn't!

Pete Delkus keeps showing up on my TV screen teasing the 10:00 o'clock news with, "Snow and sleet in the forecast. I'll tell you when tonight on News 8 at Ten." I'm headed down there to beeeyotch slap him right now.

Drama Queen

The fact Bill Parcells has to take a couple of weeks to "think" about whether he wants to return as the Cowboys' head coach for $4 million is brain-numbing. He's nothing more than a drama queen wanting attention. T.O. does it with end zone celebrations. Bill is doing it now. There is no difference. Trust me. He'll take the money - and the publicity. (All the while his former understudy Sean Payton schools him during the regular season, takes AP Coach of The Year honors, and prepares for the NFC Championship game.)

A Post MLK Day Observation

There are some incredibly bright Public Defenders who have blogs that I check on all the time. (It's always good to know about other people that still care about the the Bill of Rights.) One in Dallas penned this non-legal observation a couple of days ago: The other day I went to the Dallas Stars game with a coworker (not a good game, by the way; L 2-5). While driving home, we had to stop to let the DART (Dallas' mass transit authority) light rail pass. The first train was headed north and was packed with what looked like to my coworker and I to be nothing but white people. Then a trained passed us going south, this time backed with nothing but black and hispanic people. It was a stark reminder that racial divisions (not to mention racial/class divisions) still exist, even in the PC, non-racist 21st century. Source.

There Was Some Type Of Chemical Spill . . .

. . . in Rhome today but I don't think it was a big deal. So I'll have to go to my default: Britney.

Serena Williams - Just For Fun

I Had A Pep Club Girl Wait For Me After A JV Game Once

After Patriot's quarterback Tom Brady led his team to a come from behind win over the Chargers on Sunday, this girl was waiting for him outside of the locker room. That, sir, was one fine day. Source.

They Didn't Even Teach Country Music In Law School

From a recent opinion in a dissent from the Waco Court of Appeals discussing the meaning of "reckless" discharge of a firearm: In the context of discharging a firearm, what does it mean to shoot "at" something? According to Bubba, when he shot at the juke box and hit it, it was not the reckless discharge of a gun because, in Bubba's words, "reckless hell I hit just where I was aimin'." MARK CHESNUTT, Bubba Shot the Jukebox, on LONGNECKS AND SHORT STORIES (Universal 1992). But we know that just because you hit what you are aiming at does not make the discharge any less reckless, or any more lawful. Thus we know that Bubba's definition is too narrow to be used in connection with defining "at" for purposes of the Penal Code provision.

Eeeek

Not Dead . . .

. . . just beaten down this morning. But I have learned that (1) 51% of all women are not living with a spouse, (2) Dallas-Fort Worth is getting a new sports talk station, and (3) a guy in a wheelchair has allegedly conned some teenage girls to send nude photos of themselves by pretending to be his teenage sonon the Internet (and "In one case, Burk offered a 16-year-old housekeeping work, but after a few visits, he persuaded her to pose nude for payment instead of cleaning.")

Golden Globes

I always like the Golden Globe Awards (which are on at this moment) but I'm not particularly jazzed by them tonight. At least until Salma Hayek presented an award and fired off that accent of hers. I think she's my favorite non-blonde actress in the history of ever.

Controlled Burn

It looks like various fire departments were being dispatched to Runaway Bay yesterday after there were reports of a structure fire after smoke was seen coming out of a garage door. After several frantic minutes, the alert was called off after it was determined that it was a "controlled burn" within the garage. The mind boggles.

Jenny Craig Limo Party?

A Very Brady Christmas

This story in the Messenger, of two sisters that both gave birth on December 22nd, slipped by me. (Until a faithful reader emailed me a couple of funny comments about it.) - The mothers are Shelly Brady, 23, and Stephanie Brady, 21, - One child was named "Heavenly Faith" while the other was named "Journie Ryver" - The fathers are Heath Sager and Eric Curtis who "were both excited to be fathers again." - And this sentence confused me a little: "Stephanie has another daughter, Ashtyn Sager, 1, as well as two stepdaughters, 11-year-old Shelby Edwards and 6-year-old Cheyenne Sager. Shelly is also the stepmother of 7-year-old Chance Kelley and 5-year-old Mason Kelley."

I Don't Know

"I love technology, but not as much as you, you see... But I STILL love technology... Always and forever."

If you are a tech freak and really want to see what the new iPhone can do, check out this youtube clip. Credit to a faithful reader for sending me the link.

Jack Bauer Must Be Like MacGyver

I've never watched 24 even though I've heard it's great. But it's not like I haven't been exposed to the show. You can't turn on the television. listen to the radio, or pick up a newspaper without seeing and ad for the show. I think the basic plot is that he is somehow the only man in the world that can save America. And he does it every year - 24 hours at a time. It's a safe bet he won't die this season either.