Awkward Separated At Birth

The lady found in the freezer in Mineral Wells:

And Catherine O'Hara whom I loved in Best In Show:

Former Cowboys Defensive Coordinator . . .

. . . Rob Ryan had lap band surgery last year.

The man oozes discipline, restraint, and commitment.

Story.

Above The Fold

Rita Rusic Taking You Into The Weekend

I'm not real sure who she is but Wiki tells me she is 53 years old. 

Those Birthers Have A Stick To It Quality

A Twitter Shot At The Aggies

(1 of 2) Meet the Bears is tomorrow. Student-athlete's will not be accepting payment for their autograph. #sicemwithvigilance
— Baylor Compliance (@SicEmCompliance) August 9, 2013

I'm not sure I expected that from "The Official Twitter Account of Baylor Athletics Compliance".

Edit: Hey, we've got a Separated At Birth! Manziel's new lawyer and the sports guy from Anchorman.

The Decatur Beggar Spotted In Metroplex With New Lady Friend

(Thanks, Patrick.)

Random Friday Morning Thoughts

• A woman's body was found in a freezer in Mineral Wells. Police Chief Dean Sullivan said, “We’re treating this as a possible homicide.” I now picture the chief from The Simpsons.
• Johnny Manziel has hired a couple of lawyers out of Lubbock El Paso and, although their reputation is outstanding, they sure project "country" by their photos. 
• "Public tribute for Kidd Kraddick set for August 15th at 5:30 p.m. on the AT&T Plaza outside the American Airlines Center." Outside? In this heat?
• Mark Cuban's brother, "a non-practicing lawyer", has written a book about how wheel off his life was.  "I became what I thought I had to be in order to fit in to that crowd — a drug-using, drinking, obnoxious club-hopping douche bag." 
• I had no idea that Bryan Cranston of Breaking Bad also had the recurring role of the dentist on Seinfeld.
• Fernando Cantu of Bridgeport was found guilty of a lesser charge of negligent injury to a child yesterday in Decatur. Make no mistake, that's a huge defense victory. I've heard the guy has a ton of support from west of the Big Sandy.
• NBC is going hard into soccer by obtaining the rights to broadcast the English Premiere League. Its sports channel is basically running informational shows right now on what it is and who you might want to cheer for. I got a little sucked in last night. (But from what I can tell, that twenty team league has only four teams that are capable of winning it.)
• Randy Galloway will retire from radio at the end of the year. I've found him nearly unbearable to listen to for the past decade. 
• A couple of days ago I made a reference to Take It Easy by The Eagles. Yesterday, the Fort Worth Court of Appeals issued an opinion in a civil case that had this line in the beginning: "On November 10, 2008, Wipff was the conductor for a train traveling from Winslow, Arizona, to Seligman, Arizona." 
• Here's the crazy Facebook story on the cover of the New York Post.

2013 Texas School Accountability Ratings Released

If I'm reading it correctly, for Wise County, only the high school in Boyd failed to pass. Eighty-four percent of all schools across the state qualified as "Met Standard".

Release.

How'd I Miss This?

The "Girls On Fox News".

(Thanks, Julie.)

Sign Of The Apocalypse?

At this moment we are being threatened by storms that do not understand the concept of a high pressure system.

Facebook Big Sandy Wars

Unfortunate Photograph

If you can't read it, it's about two ladies investigating a "death" in a citizen's police academy.

Credit: Bud Kennedy.

Edit: Photo being placed to the two headlines is what makes the placement unfortunate. (Did I really have to explain that?)

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• Mark Davis said this morning that no Republican candidate could beat Hillary Clinton in the next presidential election other than maybe a Ted Cruz/Chris Christie ticket.  That man take up drinking?
• The Fifth Grader In The House told me she felt sorry for me for having to dress up all the time. Tell me about it, child. 
• Sports: (1) TCU coach Gary Patterson chastised LSU for reinstating a player yesterday which might lead to an LSU throttling of the Frogs in a couple of weeks, (2) the NCAA will either suspend Johnny Football which will ultimately lead to the organization's demise, or it won't suspend him which will also ultimately lead to the organization's demise, and (3) There's a new Ticket app which everyone is going crazy about -- all the podcasts are there and you can pause and rewind the live radio feed. 
• A group of us at the courthouse, including men and women,  had "Testosterone Talk" yesterday at the courthouse. It was pretty fascinating. Females afraid to broach the subject with their husbands and men admitting why they might want to take it. 
• The "Double Fake Chris Davis" comments on here every time he hits a home run. That's a funny bit. And the real official Liberally Lean MLB player is up to 40 home runs for the season. 
• And some commenter for years has blamed the mortgage crisis on Clinton because he "forced banks" to lend to poor people.  You, sir, are clueless.  Ask companies like Bear Stearns if they went out of business because they were "forced" to do anything.  
• A Mavs Maniac dancer (a group of fat men who perform at Dallas Maverick games to keep the crowd interested) allegedly shot and killed four people last night. 
• The alleged Saginaw killer of a little girl (who was from Decatur but we don't talk about that) had his book-in photo released yesterday. Wheels. Off. 
• Over the last twenty years, government jobs -- even in Texas -- are becoming more attractive than private sector jobs. The wages are equal or better and the benefits exceed the private sector by a mile. 
• George Dunham of The Ticket said this morning that We're The Millers is funnier than The Hangover or Bridesmaids. I'm not sure that's possible. 
• My three favorite Muppets: (1) Grover, (2) Animal, and (3) Beaker.  Edit: A commentor said that I should double up on the Testosterone after reading this. Pay the man, Shirley.
• We had about 15 spare bricks and 20 decorative bricks that we needed to get rid of. Mrs. LL put an ad on Craigslist to "come get them for free" and she received a landslide of responses. 

Not sure the story behind this Decatur funeral

What I've learned from a faithful reader:

J. M. Brooks . . . built the casket himself. I can send you pictures or give you any information you wish to know about it.

He gave us . . . explicit instructions that he was not to ride in a hearse. We had intended to load him in the back of [our] pickup when one of his dear friends offered the use of this Peterbuilt.

He was a great, self-made man . . . .  Anyone that knew him, knows how much the casket, service, and marker are him.

Edit: Other photos

Miss Redneck Alabama 2013 Contest

I hope Neil Young will remember.

Link.

And Another: New Jersey

Boom!  2013 making a strong second half charge.

Story.

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts

• I'm always on the lookout for ads disguised as news story and there is no question this article about movie and record rankings in the Dallas Morning News is actually an ad for some outfit named "CD Source".  The tip off? This quote from the owner in the article: “Besides music we have a large selection and variety of used and new movies.”
• This isn't breaking news, but if you want to see a map of the massive electrical lines which have destroyed the landscape over the past couple of years in North Texas, and especially Wise County,  here ya go. 
• Funny new nickname I heard this morning for Johnny Manziel: "The Money Badger."
• If I'm the Aggies, I'd have my backup QB taking lots of snaps, but I still don't know if the NCAA will take action and declared Manziel ineligible.  A few weeks back there was huge saber rattling by the biggest five football conferences about breaking off from all other teams and the NCAA altogether. The NCAA is scared to death about that and now they've got to deal with this Johnny Football mess. 
• I'm a third of the way through Empire of the Summer Moon and am still loving it. Yesterday a came across a passage about Bianca Babb, a young girl living "near Decatur" who was kidnapped by the Comanches but ultimately returned after a ransom was paid. (I learned there's a historical marker about her two miles east of Chico on FM 1810). Any of her relatives still in the area?
• And the book is sympathetic to the Comanches but even the author can't candy coat it: They were truly bloodthirsty savages. 
• Lake Bridgeport is becoming infamous. The Star-Telegram has an article today entitled "Part of Lake Bridgeport nearly dry enough to ‘drive across’"
• The Paradise/Bridgeport model is in another Maxim contest.
• The U.S. hit Yemen again last night with another drone strike -- this time killing at least six. We truly are entering the era of the robot war. I mean, if the invasion of  Normandy were to occur today,  it would be ton with 5,000 drones, right? 
• Placed in my "to be read later" file (and I do have one), this New Yorker article about how police and prosecutors abuse forfeiture laws. The author's lead "example takes place 176 miles east of here, outside of Longview, in the little town of Tenaha, Texas.' (Credit: Frontburner)
• If I come across a long article I want to read later, I email it to myself in gMail, put a personalized label on it named "To Be Read Later", and then archive it. When I have time, I go back and look in that folder of stuff to read. 
• The Fifth Grader in the House was eating some kind of candy out of a box yesterday that were formed in a combination of Angry Birds and Star Wars characters. Idiocracy.

Above The Fold

Everyone Is Equal But Some Are More Equal Than Others

Go to http://t.co/qpH4tNnIpH, type in "Manziel" in upper right search box, hit enter. This comes up. pic.twitter.com/N7KNvXIu24
— Jay Bilas (@JayBilas) August 6, 2013

As the NCAA is (or is on the verge of) investigating Johnny Manziel for allegedly profiting off his own signature, an ESPN reporter has discovered that the search engine for the NCAA store uses Manziel's name to direct purchasers to Aggie jerseys.

I'll Never Get This Out Of My Mind

Appreciate HLN anchor kind remarks re: my investigation/arrest of suspect traveling 2 kill her http://t.co/oyYavLyFQw pic.twitter.com/5MS98IL17M
— Joe Arpaio (@RealSheriffJoe) August 6, 2013

Sheriff Joe.

Nancy Grace.

Together.

Britney Spears Went To Church

Really.

Amen.

The Ballad Of Last Night's Fountain Lady

How a drunk lady in Kansas City can end up in a fountain and, more importantly, in the cross-hairs of the funny scope of Deadspin in less than 24 hours.

I'm Calling For An End To All This Minor League Baseball Schtick

This is 100% fake, right? I mean, that is some bad acting. Like Duck Dynasty bad acting. (There was one not too long ago where a minor league team did a fake angry couple on kiss cam.) There's a trend going on that must stop. We don't need double fake dating couples trying to take it to the next level. Why not just haul out a real married couple who will argue over bills, kids, sex, vacations, pets, school, work, in-laws, the trash, The Bachelor candidates, the lawn, toilet seat positions, or toothpaste caps. That's a bit we can believe in.

Oh, and what the heck is a New Britain Rock Cat? Crazy cat. Psycho cat. Dumb cat. That, I understand.

Oh, The Humanity!

I think the funniest part is the crowd's reaction at 1:15 after the do-over.  Their disappointment lasted for, oh, about half of a second. The excitement and drama of bowling ain't what it used to be.

Favorite Singer?

ESPN is airing a million little league games so there's bound to be some screw ups. But, sheesh.  The best speculation is that this kid's favorite band was actually "One Direction".

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts

• Those remaining of what's left of Kidd Kraddick in the Morning were interviewed by Dale Hansen last night. I just can't see that show going on. It's rudderless. And Kellie Rasberry pretty much called Big Al Mack out to his face for not being more positive. Not a good start. 
• And after the interview aired, what did an incredibly emotionally distant Rasberry tweet: " All righty then. Losing the weave and scheduling Botox first thing in the morning. Harsh lighting or age+stress?" 
• Four people killed in Yemen by U.S. drone strikes. For a nation of peace, we are pretty much on a perpetual killing spree these days.
• Sports: (1) What's going on with TCU? Two starters have quit the team and maybe the best defensive player in the Big 12 has been suspended for the first game, (2) Suspensions for steroids give me Tired Head, and (3) You'll never see the Heisman awarded to freshman again after this Johnny Football train wreck. 
• A Tarrant County candidate forum associated with Glenn Beck began last night with a prayer asking for Tarrant to be the "most Christian county in the most Christian state." Anyone see a problem with that?
• Testosterone update: I expected that this whole treatment was nothing but a bit, but I'm on the verge of giving it a big thumbs up. 
• The cholesterol medicine I'm taking might be important because it might prevent a heart attack when I open up the next electric bill. 
• One thing from the Eagles documentary that stuck with me was Joe Walsh, when discussing the line, "There's a girl, my lord, in a flatbed Ford", said it was great one because it was able to cram in girls, cars, and redemption.  Edit: I knew someone would point out that Walsh had nothing to do with the song. No question. But he was the one on the documentary talking about the lyrics.
• "Plano woman who met fiance at topless club is on trial, accused of trying to kill him."  My cases don't seem quite as exciting all of a sudden.
• There's a pretty big case starting in Decatur today about a Bridgeport man accused of injuring a toddler. 
• The trial of  Maj. Nidal Hasan, the accused Fort Hood shooter, begins today, and I read that it could take "weeks or even months." You gotta be kidding. That could be done in three days. Plus, it's a military court. The prosecution could probably win just by showing up. 
• WFAA story that even gets played by their Houston affiliate: "No relief in sight as Lake Bridgeport dries up."
• I told you the end was near for the Dallas ISD superintendent. Yesterday he announced his family was moving back to Colorado because the "negative media" was taking a toll on them. I'll bet $100 he doesn't make it to the end of the next school year.
• Pretty funny line last night: "A-Rod playing third, batting fourth, and taking the fifth." 

Saturday In Grand Praire

Interesting to watch people's reaction, and it looks like quite a few made an effort to help.  That doesn't include the driver of the white pickup who made a Tony Dorsett like move to exit the freeway.

Tricking Up Our Sports

From Deadspin:

This happened July 27, but we're just seeing it now . . . .  It's from a Tough Mudder event in Buffalo, N.Y., and this particular obstacle—the last before the finish line—is known as electroshock therapy because those are live wires hanging above all that mud and all those bales of hay. For the poor guy in the orange, getting zapped by a few volts wasn't the worst of it.

Chick Not Allowed To Wear These Shorts On Airline

Hang on, girl. I'm on my way to help!!!  I will not put up with that discrimination!!!

Story.

Random Monday Morning Thoughts

• A faithful reader gave me a book a while back, Empire of the Summer Moon, which I finally started reading over the weekend. It's about the Comanches in Texas in the 1800s and it is beyond fantastic. (And there's a Wise County reference in the first chapter.)
• For some reason I saw an aerial shot of Oklahoma City this weekend and had no idea how fantastic the new (?)  Devon tower is. 
• Lake Bridgeport is now officially 19 feet low. Since the lake level was changed 1972, I'm not sure it's been that low. (And I think the Tarrant County Regional Water Board isn't letting water out of the lake at this point -- we've just got evaporation going on.)
• NFL Hall of Fame notes: (1) The Induction Ceremony had an attendance of 1,105. There will more people at a regular Paradise high school football game, right?, (2) I hate Bill Parcells, but it's impossible to deny how good he was at coaching in the NFL, and (3) Great line from Larry Allen about his wife: "On our first date, she cooked for me. She cooked me two chickens, french fries, baked me a cake and gave me a 40 ounce. I knew then, that was my wife." 
• Testosterone update: I'm feeling better but nothing dramatic. But it's still early.
• Standard blog news: Five people were killed in two wrong way driver incidents in North Texas over the weekend. 
• Rick Perry sported some new glasses over the weekend at a conservative bloggers convention. Sorry, that librarian look he's going for won't make him smarter. 
• The Texas Tribune has an online database of campaign finance reports and contributors in Texas. Pretty cool. But it appears to be a few months behind. 
• Kudos to the Messenger for getting the Chico "sex trafficking" story.  The Star-Telegram had it last Wednesday but there was no reference to the girl being from Chico. But how did my faithful readers not make the connection and tip me off? 
• An 83 year old woman was driving the wrong way in Parker County a couple of weeks back and critically injured a guy. He sued her and the case went to trial last week which resulted in a $5.2 million verdict. Question: Why was that case tried? She wasn't working for anyone at the time so she probably just had a standard liability policy. How does the insurance company not tender policy limits? And if they did, why wasn't it taken?
• Mark Cuban used 3,000 words on his blog to explain why he isn't screwing up the Mavericks. Now he's actually using tactics of a snake oil salesman. 
• Maybe the newspaper business isn't in bad shape after all: The Boston Globe will be sold for $70 million. Oh, wait. The seller bought it twenty years ago for $1.1 billion. 

I Shrugged At First . . .

. . . then I read how incredibly detailed the allegations were. This is a problem. I don't see how the University can let him play a down until this is cleared up.

And if true, Johnny Football has played his last down of Aggie football and will go down in history as being the dumbest Aggie of all time.  Credit goes to his dad for being the worst disciplinarian of all time.

I love the way the newest article ends: "Yeah, it could all come unraveled," Johnny's father told ESPN The Magazine. "And when it does, it's gonna be bad. Real bad."

Edit: Johnny responds to the allegations . . .