12.01.2006

I've Never Seen An Actual Line . . .

. . . being placed on the ground before the very deceptive Walk and Turn test is administered. But it didn't matter much for this guy.

I Love Free Speech Cases . . .

. . . and so does the Supreme Court who agreed to hear this case today. Quick facts: The Olympic torch was to pass in front of a school in Alaska. The school released the kids from class to watch the event, and one kid, a trouble maker after my own heart, decides to unfurl a "Bong Hits 4 Jesus" banner on the other side of the street - land that is off of school property. He is suspended (and this is the critical fact) because of the content of the banner (and for no other reason). To make matters worse, the school principal actually crossed the street and crumpled up the banner. He sues. The Supreme Court has now decided to determine whether his free speech rights were violated. Here's an interesting note: The school district is being represented for free by Kenneth Starr, the nutcase who was in charge of the Clinton impeachment. At least we now have a little insight into the man who was willing to waste millions of your tax dollars. Edit: A "cooling off" period has been declared for the comments. And, folks, can we tone down the language? (And, no, it's not censorship since I'm not a governmental entity.) Play nice.

Wouldn't Your Belly Still Be Cold?

Mariah Carey.

Fathead . . .

. . . is a company that produces huge wall art of various professional athletes that you can . . . uh . . . put on your wall. So far, they have been limited to players. But now they have struck a deal which allows them to do the same with three Dallas Cowboys' Cheerleaders. You can get Becca, Andrea or Nicole here. I just found my eighth, ninth, and tenth wives. And they will be very low maintenance.

I Walk By This Old Building . . .

. . . in Decatur every day. It kind of reminds me of the Amityville Horror house.

I'm Going To Worry About Britney All Weekend

Christmas Gift Idea

Buy it for Junior, here.

The Frozen Tundra Of TCU

I Finally Saw the "Borat" Movie

Verdict: Huge thumbs up. (Although I spent alot of time uttering 'oh noooooo' at all of the uncomfortable tension.) I'm not much of a "laugh out loud" kinda guy, but I did it at this movie.

Not Sure

I saw four guys dressed in some all black commando style outfits in a Jacksboro convenience store this morning. (Complete with black "Gilligan" style hats.) They had an insignia that read S.O.R.T. on their shoulder patches, and I got close enough to read "Special Operations Response Team." One of them had what looked like an ID card with the letters "CC" on it. They didn't look military. They didn't look like cops. Anybody want to clue me in?

11.30.2006

One Weird Thing About Me

I hate watching sports injuries. I think I'd rather experience it than watch it. But someone has collected the Top Ten Leg and Arm Injuries on YouTube.com and put them all in one place. I haven't watched a single one. But I know my audience, and you guys can't help but click on this link. Ignore the background.

I Don't Know

Best Crash Of The Day - Slim Pickens

Fox 4 News had a pretty good one, but it was too dark.

Where's Recklessness When You Need It?

High Sheriff David Walker tells me that the WCSO teamed up with DPS for accident assistance today. Being prepared for the equivalent of a Hindenburg disaster, they were called out on only seven minor accidents (and two of those turned out to not be accidents at all.) No injuries were reported.

Man Or Woman?

This disturbing time wasting game was just sent to me. I refused to play it. But if I did, hypothetically speaking, I would have been 13 out of 16.

Tony Romo Giggle

I'd Be Happy To Make It To Allsups

. . . but that thing called the television just told me that Dr. Scott and Donna Stowers are trying to get to Atlanta. (That's a Wise County couple to those of you confused.)

Quoting From Another Blog

Have you seen [the Southwest Kia commercials]? Bill Dickason is walking through the dealership, talking about his good deals on Kias, when he's inexplicably interrupted by a short clip of a kitten playing or two deer nuzzling or a baby getting a bath. Then Dickason returns to the screen and doesn't address the interruption at all. The first time I saw one of these, I thought I was losing my mind. I finally saw one of the commercials. Bizarre. But it's the only way in the world I'd mention a Kia dealership so I guess it's effective.

Channel 8 Has Gone Picture Crazy

Bridgeport got into the mix as did Rhome. But things were kinda put in perspective when the pic from Amarillo was put on the screen.

I'm Not Sure Why

. . . but a couple from Decatur managed to get a digital picture broadcast on Channel 8 news this morning. By the way, Channel 8 has named the storm "Bitter Blast."

Maybe We Should All Stay Home With A Good Book

And here's a blog dedicated to nothing but pictures of hot girls with books. I love the Internet.

Lack Of School Closings

This might be a dicey proposition if things freeze over during the day. Getting everybody home in the ice (if that happens) is dangerous. Edit: It's slick out there! Edit: I saw that Alvord ISD and Slidell ISD are shut down. I have a very unconfirmed report that Decatur ISD will shut down at 10:00. Edit: Bridgeport ISD closing at 11:00 a.m. Edit: Paradise ISD closing at noon.

Incredible

We lock people up for drugs, place people on probation that are no threat to society whatsoever, and keep coming up with more "crimes" every year so that the above figure will keep getting larger and larger.

11.29.2006

It Begins

I Don't Understand . . .

. . . the jacked up truck.

Harold Taft Note

My thermostat in my Lamborghini read 78 degrees at lunch today. If this cold front comes through like I think it will, this may be the most dramatic change in weather I've ever seen. Oddly, there's a tornado watch this afternoon followed by a winter storm warning which begins at midnight. Good times.

I Had A Party At My House Last Weekend

I'm very embarrassed that a video of the event has leaked onto the Internet.

All Cranked Up

"Wanda in Runaway Bay" just called the Mark Davis Show on WBAP to talk about the dangers of meth. She mentioned that all of her three daughters had tried it - one "blew a blood vein in her spleen" and "one of 'em did it with her boss in Rhome." Then she ended the call with the proclamation that methamphetamine is "just like cigarettes in the 1960s - everybody wanted to smoke!" That confused me. That confused Mark Davis.

Anybody Know What's Going On?

From the Update.

"Wintery Mix"

Get ready for the following on the local news: a reporter standing by a highway, trucks being loaded with sand, trucks spreading sand, interviews with the guy in charge of the trucks with sand, driving tips, being told to steer into the direction of the skid 500 times, "it feels like [x] degrees if you factor in the wind chill", the homeless, the danger of space heaters, checking on the elderly, school closing, school delays, the difference between sleet, snow and freezing rain, footage of past car wrecks, the footage of an actual wreck taking place, the effect on home heating bills, the importance of wearing "layers of clothes", "don't venture out unless you have to," the use of the phrase "essential personnel", a reporter in Parker County, a reporter in Decatur, Troy Dungan and Pete Delkes holding each other to keep warm, footage of kids playing in the snow, a close up of a tire spinning, the phrase "bridges and overpasses" . . . .

Dallas v. Notre Dame v. Jenny Craig

11.28.2006

Evil Roy Slade

I rarely suggest anyone buy anything, but if you even remotely relate to my sense of humor I want you to buy, and I am not kidding, a 1971 made for TV movie called "Evil Roy Slade." I know what your thinking but trust me. It may be the funniest movie I've ever seen. There are people in this world that "get it" and there are those that don't. This movie, even with age, is the litmus test. The most amazing thing is that you can find out if your child, assuming he/she is over ten years of age, falls in the "gets it" category. It's now on DVD.

"Ho, Ho, Ho, sweet baby Jesus"

"The Ticket" radio station always makes fun of the very unstable (and confusing) Christmas neighborhood decoration of a nativity scene which includes . . . uh . . . Santa. You can have one for $94.99 from Target.

Flashback

I posted this about a year ago, but today's proclamation by the Rev. Jesse Jackson (that all black entertainers, including comedians and rap artists, should abandon the use of the "n word") made me think of it. The news report starts a tad bit slow but when the white guy starts explaining, with the aid of handmade graphics, why he used the word "nigga" it becomes 100% gold.

Thou Shalt Not Flaunt The Law

It looks like a small county in Florida has just erected the 10 Commandments on the courthouse steps. Last January, when the decision was made to install the monument, the county attorney promised to represent the county for free if any legal challenges were filed. Although he no longer is the county attorney, he promises to keep his word. He better get ready. Story here.

Not Sure What The History Is On This

Time Waste

Smack the penguin. (Click on the bat once to start and again to swing.)

Decatur's Trevor Brazile

. . . has made a train load of money this year as the NFR is set to begin.

I Bet He's Gonna Buy a Backstreet Boys CD

NBC News has been using this footage to show the number of early morning shoppers on "Black Friday." Check out the big guy on the left and his "happy dance" as he makes it through the door. I can't help but laugh every time I see it.

11.27.2006

My 4th Wife

Nobody Gets More Spam Than Me . . .

. . . and these have been showing up by the dozens on a daily basis.

I Didn't Know That

Although I refuse to get too excited about the Dallas Cowboys (I gave up cheering for professional sports teams 10 years ago), I try to keep informed. But I did not know that Dallas had an assistant head coach named Tony Sparano. And that's not a typo.

Spare Me

The Dallas Morning News yesterday had a story in the sports section about some CPA (yep, a CPA) who had killed some defenseless huge mule deer in Colorado. Like that suddenly makes him a man's man. And the above quote got my attention. It speaks of why he stayed an extra day after seeing the deer very late one afternoon some four miles away. He decided to spend the night and go after Darth Bambi the next day. Buddy, that "very important business meeting" couldn't have been that important, the fact that you didn't want to "waste time" going to find cell service that night indicates you are inconsiderate, and "owning you own business" isn't gonna work out for long if you simply stand up people who expect to meet you.

It's The Un-Holy Trinity

My Typical Monday

I Can't Hear Myself Think

At a gas station in Fort Worth outside of a Walmart this weekend, they had added a TV screen (top pic) that plays commercials as well as news and weather from Channel 8. At the same time, there is audio playing from a separate screen about some fuel additive.

Decatur Has An Inflatable Monkey Today

Me loves me the inflatable monkey.

Giggle

What Deer?

Maybe We Can Talk About The Weather

And I don't know why I'm looking forward to Thursday so much.

11.26.2006

I Did Not Post This

She Turned 35 This Weekend

But "Married With Children", which is one of my favorite guilty pleasures, seems like yesterday.

We've Got A Double "Hey, Now"

I Wonder If Dakota Fanning Ate That Pig For Thanksgiving?

Shout Out

The Messenger made reference this weekend about my running in the Turkey Trot and also referenced Sheriff David Walker running in a similar event in Fort Worth. I would be remiss if I didn't point out that the Assistant Wise County Attorney, Thomas Aaberg, ran the 8 mile race in Dallas and finished in 59:05.05 - a very brisk 7:23 per mile pace.

"I Done Wet My Britches"

In 1994, the greatest high school football game in the history of ever was played at Texas Stadium. Plano East trailed Tyler John Tyler 41-13 with just under three minutes to go. What happened next was simply unbelievable. The clip above is four minutes long. Check it out.