blank'/> Liberally Lean From The Land Of Dairy Queen: 11/22/09 - 11/29/09

11.27.2009

Trust Me

I don't know how exactly I stumbled upon this movie this evening, but I want you to do one thing this holiday season: Rent it. I promise you one thing, you cannot believe how bad it is. It's the kind of bad that as you are trying to accept the impossibility of the plot the director clubs you over the head with a cliche. It is so bad that I couldn't stop watching it. I can't believe what I just saw. It's so horrible, that it's good. Denzel Washington. John Lithgow. Ice-T. Kevin Pollack. Lindsay Wagner. John Amos. Yep, that's the cast. It is now in my Top Five for worst movies ever. Easily.

News About A Guy Who Rarely Makes News Off The Golf Course

Developing. Fox News is using the term "seriously". Edit: So odd. All the reports keeping calling it a one car accident but that "charges are pending." Huh? Edit #2: At 2:28 p.m. CNN says that he has been released from the hospital. Edit: Very brief police report. PDF. Edit: Since it appears he is OK, the first funny line being circulated is, "He should have used a driver." Edit: Woah. TMZ says the injuries were caused by his wife. Double. Woah.

The Great Aggie Kiss Diss From Last Night

Pretty funny.

Abbreviated Random Thoughts

  • I'm thankful on Thanksgiving that I don't have to travel a long distance for the holidays. That would be a beating.
  • Unless you are dying to see a reporter in a mall this morning, don't turn on the local TV news.
  • I ran the Dallas Turkey Trot yesterday morning (8 miles in 1:08:57). I started doing that a little over 10 years ago and kick myself for not starting it 20 years ago. I absolutely love it.
  • Nothing is funnier than spotting the guy running in speedos, feathers attached to his butt, and holding a big American flag on a pole. He's there every year.
  • A&M scared the Evil Empire last night. And that A&M quarterback should give you Aggies a lot of hope for the future.
  • Fun facts: No eventual BCS National Champion has ever given up as many points or as many yards as Texas did last night in a regular season game (without overtime.)
  • Funny thing I read yesterday: If we never order turkey when we go out to eat then why do we have it for special holiday occasions?
  • No way I'm getting up and going shopping at the crack of dawn when I'd have to fight the crowds.
  • The Who is the halftime entertainment for the Super Bowl? What demographic are they going after?
  • A high tone couple snuck into the State Dinner the other night with the gal getting her picture taken with Joe Biden? Secret Service fail.
  • The last time TCU won the National Championship they beat Carnegie Tech in the Sugar Bowl. Carnegie Tech? Yep. And it still exists.
  • Jerry Jones sure did cave in a hurry in hanging an American flag in the new stadium. I think he sensed that the story could blow up into an actual controversy.
  • But is we are all so patriotic and love the flag so much, how come we just noticed there wasn't one there until two weeks ago?

11.25.2009

Happy Thanksgiving

Where I Sit (2008)
And my annual call back to my 2005 post.

At Least I Think I Influenced It

Someone with a big brain over at the Messenger figured out that the Wise County Sheriff's Office weekly crime reports, which are huge crowd pleasers, deserve their own web page.

Decatur's Mike Lee Hot Dogs It. Bull Takes Offense.

My Strange Pet Peeve

I'm convinced that local newscasts, which are financially strapped, are sneaking in ads disguised as news stories. This morning I saw this one on Channel 8 where the segment was opened up with "We've done some comparison shopping for you." Then the anchor read the screen and the whole segment lasted about 30 seconds -- the time of a paid commercial.
That's an ad for Kroger, right? I mean, why just compare Kroger and Tom Thumb? Why just show three items where Kroger wins every time?

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts

Edit: I've learned this is a repeat. But a good repeat.
  • Crown Royal had an interesting marketing idea. Have a bunch (?) of vans available for free rides home in big cities, including Dallas, on Thanksgiving Eve to combat drunk driving. Pay Jimmy Johnson a ton of money to be the spokesperson. And then make Jimmy available to sports talks shows across the nation for a free segment so long as he can spend a minute plugging the Crown Royal Free Ride Home program. If you listened to the radio yesterday, you heard him.
  • The concept was based on Thanksgiving Eve being a "major party night." I don't think that's true.
  • Although I did see a conga line composed of a party of Germans break out at Billy Miner's in downtown Fort Worth about 20 years ago on that night.
  • The State Dinner for the prime minister of India last night looked like a pretty good gig. But they had Jennifer Hudson sing? Why?
  • I hope Obama doesn't ramp up the troop level in Afghanistan but instead starts bringing them home. All the Taliban will do is run off into the mountains of Pakistan where we aren't allowed to go. Yep, we can't have troops in Pakistan.
  • Not a whole lot of minorities at the Sarah Palin book signings.
  • Have you seen the story of the guy that was thought to be in a coma for 23 years but was really aware of his surroundings? Call me crazy, but I don't believe it. And the video of the nurse typing what he wants her to looks ridiculous.
  • Limited interest: Want to see Baylor's new freshman girl basketball sensation dunk a ball during a game? 25 second mark.
  • My hot sports opinion that A&M beating Texas would be the greatest upset in the series history? Yeah, I'll stand by that. The Longhorns are a 25+ point favorite and never, ever, has a season been laid out for UT to get to the national championship game. For the Aggies to ruin that, it would be remembered forever.
  • The lack of a stationary U.S. flag at Cowboys Stadium is a silly controversy. A color guard during the national anthem is sufficient.
  • Ugh. President Obama will continue the tradition of "pardoning" a turkey today. Fail.
  • I wrote the other day about learning of a friend's marriage breaking up by his absence on her Facebook page. Now, the man writes about it. It's a bit more shocking than I realized. Edit: It was a blog post on the Dallas Observer but the paper "yanked" it shortly after it was published. Dang it. Edit #2: But Google caches things in a hurry! Page 1. Page 2.

11.24.2009

Ole Miss KKK Rally Last Weekend

Language warning. And if you can get past the bubba in the crowd who is pro civil rights, you'll hear the voice of a girl in the background who may be the voice from that "Cause I'm a pothole" commercial. But, overall, the entire scene is amazing. Simply amazing.

I Want This Guy As A Client

One of the first things you learn in Crime Committing 101 is to not leave any evidence behind. Evidence is bad. Evidence can get you convicted. So what does this bank robbing guy do? He eats the bank robbing note. And he doesn't do any of the ol' panic and make a big scene out of destroying evidence routine. Nope, he's cool about it. Fonzie cool. Source.

Little Kid Linebacker Terrorizes Other Little Kids

Two plays here. The first one shows a QB holding the ball on a busted play only to get waylayed by the second coming of Lawrence Taylor. (It happens pretty fast.) The second play is self explanatory since you'll see what I call the "Launching Of The Running Back."
But, uh, aren't these kids a little small to be playing tackle football? I mean, it looks like most of them are on the verge of falling down when they attempt to simply run.

Pick Me Up: Katie Couric Giving It The What For

Scoreboard for the Liberal Media.

From The Update

Boyd gives Decatur and Bridgeport the Heisman. Proclaims dominance for years to come.

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts

  • Get ready for news stories about "busy airports" on Wednesday and the size of shopping crowds on Friday.
  • I have no idea what the story is behind yesterday's pic of the Fox Business anchor. I presume it's photoshopped. But nicely photoshopped.
  • I think I know one person that actually owns the "Photoshop" software.
  • You can dial "211" for flu advice? Really?
  • When exactly did AT&T and Verison declare nuclear war upon each other.
  • I recorded a program called "The Lost JFK Tapes" off of the National Geographic Channel last night. Now if I can just remember to watch it.
  • I had someone get mad at me last night when I started to explain something that was funny on TV. She did not appreciate me trying to explain humor. Tenseness ensued.
  • I've already bought three Christmas gifts. That's a new record for me. But after I waited all Christmas Eve day for UPS (to eventually fail me), I decided that wasn't going to happen again.
  • Baylor and Tech are playing at The Death Star on Saturday and there's no way I'm going to watch that disaster.
  • We may now have the picture of the year from the Denton book-in photo site from over the weekend.
  • I've been a fan of Firefox for years but am slowly using Google's Chrome more and more.
  • Hard to believe it was 10 years ago that the Y2K "threat" was building up. And was that not one big scam?
  • There's no way A&M beats Texas on Thursday night, but if it were to happen it might very well be the biggest upset in Longhorn history.
  • The chances of a newspaper vending machine not working in Wise County are very high.
  • President Obama had a meeting of the "War Council" last night. I couldn't help but think of the movie line, "Gentlemen! There is no fighting in the War Room!"
  • I suppose no one in the actual room would dare make that joke. Or would they?
  • I ended up at the north end of DFW Airport around rush hour yesterday. Sheesh, 114 is horrible but going north to 635 or 121 looked insane.

11.23.2009

Even Chuck Norris Fears These Men

The Messenger's Joe Duty had a little photo shoot with former Texas Ranger Lane Akin and Wise County Sheriff David Walker. More here.

Almost Forgot

It's the weekly Wise County Crime Report. There's also some dead possum news in the link.

He's Baaaaack

First AnObiter came out of exile and now it's the conservative you all love to hate: Jarhead.

I've Changed My Position On The Death Penalty

Because this hot girl got hit with some kind of bottle at a game over the weekend. This time the lawlessness has gone to far.

Happy Thanksgiving Week

Random Monday Morning Thoughts

With a weekend round up of being a tour guides to friends:
  • The Sixth Floor Museum is really neat in a morbid sort of way.
  • Despite many frames of the Zapruder film being on display throughout the place, the famous "head shot" is no where to be seen. I suppose that makes sense.
  • It's amazing the number of people that come to the grassy knoll on a daily basis -- and they can always tell where Kennedy was hit by gunfire on the street because there is an "X" painted on the pavement. Really.
  • There was one guy standing around proclaiming that he was there on the day the shots were fired. My conclusion: Nut Case.
  • Traffic in the metroplex is getting unbearable.
  • Took my friends to Angelo's on Friday night and they got to witness a drunk and arguing couple tip the waitress $100.
  • Most awkward couple moment: The girl telling the waitress, "He's not my boyfriend. He's my brother. Well. Kinda."
  • And then I actually set foot in Billy Bob's on a Friday night. Not much has changed over the years except guys are no longer required to wear the uniform of starched shirts and ropers.
  • They don't have Whataburger's in the northeast (where my friends were from), so we had to stop by there at midnight.
  • Went by the Gaylord Texas on Saturday and it's already decked out for Christmas. Even if you don't spend a dime there for anything other than parking, go walk around that place. Amazing.
  • And who did I see in the lobby at around 10:00 p.m.? Cowboy's Patrick Crayton. He was just sitting down and talking to kids. (Apparently the hotel is where the Cowboys stay before home games.)
  • That night we went to the Glass Cactus (last reported on by Jarhead a few months back.) Downstairs is a beating. Upstairs is people watching gold.
  • Went to the Cowboy game yesterday. Parking and getting in and out is pretty much a breeze. And the game presentation is just short of Idiocracy --- and that thing is printing money.
  • But the game would be more enjoyable if the two people behind us would shut the heck up. It was like listening to bad color commentary including such gems as, "We need to put our fast players on that guy to cover him!"
  • And I bought the tickets from Stubhub and was almost rewarded with a game that almost had zero touchdowns.
  • I'm tired of eating out for three days in a row.
  • I can't sleep when I'm responsible for waking other people up.
  • On to other things:
  • I predicted New Moon would set all box office records, and I was close. It had the third best opening weekend ever with $140 million.
  • I just saw a commercial staged as a news story on NBC 5 about 24 Hour Fitness providing free personal trainers this week.
  • The Texas Lawyer newspaper has an article on leasing issues in the Barnett Shale.

11.22.2009

Paradise Found

The Star-Telegram's Bud Kennedy sends along these pics from a new park he saw in University Park. (There's a Wise County reference at the bottom of the statue.)