9.01.2009

I Can Heal Our Wounds

Ok, folks, after weeks of arguing over Obama, Obamacare, Cash For Clunkers, Bailouts, Socialism, Townhalls, Spider Monkeys,Birthers, and darn near everything else, I've come up with a great idea to bring us together: Cuddle Parties!!! How did I not think of this? Just picture it: Denny Crane, MzChief, Wordkyle, Double Fake Guy, Chupacabra, Mike Honcho, Jarhead, Adolf O. Bush, Triple Fake Guy, Your Majesty and everyone else all involved in the peaceful and calming effect of the group cuddle. This is going to kill. They said there was a $30 charge in the video, but that's crazy. I'm charging $20. No, wait. Make it $29.99. And in someone's home? No way. We are taking over Frilly's at Happy Hour (but before Karaoke because I've been practicing my Debbie Gibson.) And the Wise County Singles Club thought they had kick arse events! Step aside, boys. There's a new Party Sheriff in town.

59 comments:

Anonymous said...

Do you think this will melt Jarhead and Wordie's cold, cold hearts? It's worth a try...

Anonymous said...

To hell with a cuddle party...im thinking 8oz boxing gloves and a ring party!

Is this where the jerry springer auditions are held!


vote uncle fester 2012

Anonymous said...

I think if you had a cuddle party with the people you mentioned, it might turn into a slug-fest instead.

Anonymous said...

You forgot to invite Asstapper.

Anonymous said...

This rock's...I'm there!

Anonymous said...

a cuddle party with a bunch of ugly people......too stressful

Anonymous said...

Uh......no thanks, buddy. Too many swords in the room for my taste.

Double Fake "Guy"

Anonymous said...

OH CRAP, it's another alien ploy!!
PUT ON YOUR FOIL HATS AND TAKE COVER!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Can I skip cuddling with MZ please? I already got bit by a rattlesnake, gored by a bull, and accidentally cut my thang off with a machete this week.

You may call me Your Majesty. In fact, I insist. said...

Come here, ya'll, I need a hug.

Anonymous said...

I suppose cuddling with MzChief could be a life-changing experience???

mzchief said...

Not on your best day and/or my worst.

Anonymous said...

Well, as one of the people mentioned by handle, I think this is really gay. But you knew that, right? Actually, I have hugged one of the other people mentioned, and I plan to keep the total at one. Unless you get Silicone Alley involved, then maybe I'm in
Hosting it at Frilly's makes me think you will try to turn it into one of those "Let's have a beer and attempt to hammer out our differences" type deals, trying to emulate your leader. But I'm more of a "Let's have a beer...okay, how 'bout another beer?" type guy

Plus, I've heard of these kind of deals where you get people to show up for what sounds like a good deal, and then you arrest them all for outstanding warrants. You would stand to make a nice little sum defending us all, wouldn't you?

Triple Fake Not Falling For It

Anonymous said...

I would probably get a huge fat chick on each side of me...just my luck!

Anonymous said...

Will there be booze and drugs ?

Anonymous said...

I'll play the banjo

Xanthippas said...

I'll go for this if WordKyle is required to whisper liberal talking points in my ear while he rubs my back.

wordkyle said...

Too far to drive, plus I have to wash my hair that night.

mzchief said...

To anonymous 1:48...
*OTFLOLHysterically*
YOU RAWK!
*StillLOLHysterically*

You have no idea how hard it is to type while crying laughing tears. Too bad about your "thang."

*StillLOL*

Anonymous said...

Isn't there a guy at Frilly's everyday that hugs everybody?

Anonymous said...

Invite Chuck Berry and then we'll know whose playing with whose ding-a-ling.

House of R and R said...

One word....CREEPY! There is no way I would ever do anything like that.

Anonymous said...

How bout an ammo party...alcohol tabacco firearms...whos bringing the chips...poker in the rear!

Anonymous said...

I'll join in I'd you can get comment4u and bigcatdaddy to come out of retirement to join in.

Anonymous said...

Oh, all right, but I don't know if I trust the banjo players. I'm just sayin.

Anonymous said...

comment4u is anobitor 2:26. can't believe you didn't know that.

Anonymous said...

Bigcatdaddy....Would you???

Anonymous said...

At 30 bucks a head it looks a lot more like liberals engaging in capitalism.

Who'd a ever thunk it?

Double Fake Jack I.T. Box said...

OMG, I just threw up the Subway that I ate before getting on this blog.

Anonymous said...

Giggity Giggity Giggity - df Quagmire

Double Fake Anobiter said...

MzCreep is drinking again.

Anonymous said...

Speaking of Frilly's, who is Teri Lyn? and why is she back?

Anonymous said...

I don't care what anyone says these comments are fun!

Anonymous said...

I'm a gay P1 and I'd pay a LOT more than 30 bucks for the chance to make a Barry sandwich.

Anonymous said...

Mr Obama is the best thing that has ever happen to this county, so step back all you haters and watch this man fix all that you bunch of bubbas have screwed up over the last 8 years!!!!

Anonymous said...

4:08
The only thing Barry Obama is going to fix is another plate of chicken and tater salad..then he will proceed to the back stoop and watch the watermelons grow in the great garden on the hill.

Anonymous said...

Skippy, admit it. You and Richard Simmons thought up the cuddle parties.

House of R and R said...

WOW 4:08 That's a mighty big statement there.

"Mr Obama is the best thing that has ever happen to this county"

Honestly, Mr. Obama hasn't done jack shit for me. But, I'm not someone whose always looking for a handout.

soz said...

never work. i dated a republican once... in her words, "i'm republican. we don't hug." maybe that's why i became a treehugger...

You may call me Your Majesty. In fact, I insist. said...

OK so I just watched the video...and that IS creepy.

mzchief said...

To anonymous 4:08...
"Mr Obama is the best thing that has ever happen to this county, so step back all you haters and watch this man fix all that you bunch of bubbas have screwed up over the last 8 years!!!!"

Obama is doing and plans on doing NOTHING to lessen the debt., NOTHING to lower the deficit and has done NOTHING to reduce unemployment, done NOTHING to denuclearize North Korea or stop nukes in Iran and done NOTHING to end the need to deploy troops into a war zone. NOTHING, Obama plans on doing will increase GDP and GDP is what increases a nation's prosperity. No! Growing the government and generating more government jobs does NOT increase GDP because government does nothing but recycle, at a cost to the citizens, money that is already in the system.

Tell me EXACTLY what it is that Obama has done to "fix" ANYTHING.

Anonymous said...

Seems like for wvery intelligent, rational person on this earth there are 13 morons/retards/ misfits/defective units.

Scary part is we let them all vote.

Anybody want to bet? I got $1,000 says everybody in that human sludge pit in that video is a Democrat.

Mr. Mike Honcho said...

I am there, Barry... just let me know when the Hug Party is. I declare myself official banjo tuning judge. I will bring my own instrument for the finals.

Step right up ladies...

PS - I will also be running the sign up booth for aforementioned banjo tuning contest. Please post pics on this thread in advance and I will let you know if you can compete.

Anonymous said...

2:07 & 2:32 hit it on the head - I'm concerned about lurking banjo players...

Jarhead said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Do they serve alcohol at the rubbin party...i would need alcohol to let girls that butt ugly rub on me...lots of alcohol

Anonymous said...

Obama is DESTROYING this country!!

Anonymous said...

Barry - What a fun post.

Commenters - What fun we can be when we aren't talking politics! (With only a few exceptions.)

Anonymous said...

we can cuddle till 12/12/12. then there'll be no mo.

bigcatdaddy said...

Someone say my name?

I never retired. I just choose to stay out of most of it.

Maybe I'll start posting again. BSG is playing in my fantasy football league, so I suppose I could post weekly updates so that y'all know how bad I'm whoopin' his ass.

Denney Crane said...

It's been a long time since I laid in a pile. I don't think I would be up for the aforementioned group... no disrespect intended, but they're way too political to take to the floor!

Now if you get a group of liberal lovelies (i.e. airheads) and draw a gallery, I may reconsider... I could learn to appreciate touch therapy... Even hot lips Mzchief might melt Georgia asphalt!

Whatever you decide to promote, I'm thankful that today it wasn't controversy and conflict...

Anonymous said...

Instead of boy, girl, boy, girl. We could have Republican, Democrat, Republican, Democrat.

Anonymous said...

4.08 keep speaking the truth obama can,will and is. helping the county get back on the right track. I just know he will turn all this around! Keep up the good work
Barack Obama 2012
Michelle Obama 2016

chupacabra said...

I saw "scary" and "creepy" as I perused the comments.

Count me in.

chupacabra said...

PS any of you saying,"not if mz is going to be there!" etc?
You wouldn't have anything to worry about- she would be too busy whispering smart stuff in my ear.

Anonymous said...

3:00AM I think that would be boy, girl, boy, girl. Just sayin.

Adolf Oliver Bush said...

I think I'll pass.

Comment4U said...

Bigcatdaddy!! Nice to "see" you again. =) Look me up on Facebook, brutha!

Anonymous said...

I had a dream last night....

Denney and I were sitting on a balcony at the La Quinta in Bridgeport, sipping scotch, smoking cigars, wearing thick bath robes all while watching the sun go down over the lovely Aggregate Mountains of Chico.

Then I woke up in a cold sweat.

Double Fake "Guy"