blank'/> Liberally Lean From The Land Of Dairy Queen: Oh, The Irony

3.02.2009

Oh, The Irony

"Far too many of your youth are leading super-sized, sedentary lifestyles which put their lives in danger," Nelson said in a statement. "Unless we take action, an entire generation of Texans will live shorter lives than their parents."

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

I say let them all be fat and dumb and teachers won't have sex with them and we will not have to throw all those billions on education down a rat hole and we will have generations of mind numbed liberal weenie voters.

Anonymous said...

Fat, dumb, hypocritical sow. Typical politician.

Anonymous said...

So said
Senator triple chin.

Anonymous said...

Nelson doesn't want our kids to grow up looking like her.

Anonymous said...

Looks like ole Jane could lose a couple of Chins herself....

Anonymous said...

You are not going to make people thin like they were 50 years ago. Technology has eliminated human muscle exertion. Today, instead of being paid to sweat, we have to pay a "gym" to make us sweat. When I was a kid growing up I sweated by loading 70-pound bales of hay on trailers and stacking it in the barn. In the winter I loaded it back on a trailer and took it back to the fields to feed cattle. I probably lifted each 70-pound bale six times before it finally got to the cattle as forage. Today I am retired and returned to live on the farm. I will use my tractor with a climate controlled cab and hydraulics to take a 1,000 pound bale to the cows. So, after finishing my chores around the farm today I will drive into Decatur in my Ford truck that has power everything (so I won't have to move my muscles) and go over to Firehouse and pay them so I can sweat. When I was a kid, a gym was a place where Clay, Patterson, Liston went to learn to beat the hell out of white guys. There were no "gyms" or health clubs that make money showing people how to sweat. Now, you know what has happened to all the pretty women.

Yesterday I went to the doctor to talk about my obesity and discuss lap band surgery. While sitting in the waiting room I remembered that I had left my car unlocked. So, I walked five feet to the door and clicked the button on my key chain. In 1960 I would have walked 100 feet (200 feet round trip) to lock my doors. Now you know what has happened to the human body.

We have a natural instinct to consume high energy food and eat just about the same as our hunter-gatherer ancestors, but just don't have to use our muscles to get at the food. Instead of chasing after wild animals to eat, BG runs marathons (honing his deer chasing skills and remaining attractive to the opposite sex so he can pass on his genes) and eats huge amounts of fat in Mexican food. Now you know the rest of the story.

Schools can't fix this, evolution might not.

I wonder if XAN is goings to try to counter this science like he did my Hollywood Global Warming essay yesterday.

Anonymous said...

Irony is dead. Just look at the first comment.

Anonymous said...

So what your saying... Is we should load hay and chase Fat chicks to bang...I like your thinkin Mr. GreenJeans...

Anonymous said...

JANE NELSON...THIS IS THE PORK PATROL...STEP AWAY FROM THE CREME SODAS AND HOHO'S...DO IT NOW!

Anonymous said...

8:17, most of us mate with chicks before they pass their prime breeding age and gain 100 pounds.

Anonymous said...

What in the world is hanging off of her right above her half buried necklace?

Anonymous said...

7:49, so what stopped you from walking to your car and locking the door as you did in 1960, instead of just pushing the button?

Anonymous said...

@7:49. AMEN. There is a lot of truth in your comments, a lot of truth. We just need to get more active. More more, eat less. Take the stairs, don't try and find the closest parking spot. Get up from your computer, walk around. The human body was meant to move.

Also, it's sad they are taking PE classes out of most schools b/c of lack of funding. Very sad.

Anonymous said...

10:19, man will choose technology over health, except for the Ammish. Our instinct is to use less energy in case we don't find food running through the forest the next day. When we find food our instinct is to stuff our stomachs in case there is no meal tomorrow. Did you not study Darwin?

How to get layed: Take a cute girl to dinner and stuff her with expensive food. This demonstrates that you are capable of providing for her and any child that may result from activities later that evening. So much centers around food. It is just Darwinism.

Anonymous said...

10:42, OK, but there millions upon millions of active, thin, fit young, middle aged and older people who apparently didn't get Darwin's memo that they are supposed to eat everything they see and avoid exertion at all costs because there is an easier way.

Anonymous said...

10:42, if I think a girl might really like me, but I sense she's a little nervous or really wants to make a good impression, I purposefully AVOID making a meal any part of the date. Instead, the date will be something a little more active and casual, not something where she's under a lot of pressure to sit and talk and worry about thinking I care about what she eats. So maybe it's just a coffee deal, or "hey I've got tickets to a game" or a museum or show date, etc. And if it's an evening type of date and things have gone well, I might suggest stopping off at a fancy restaurant, after the filet crowd has left, for a "couple bites" of some really wicked desert as a night cap. But, what do I know. You're the expert, so I guess next time instead of what I normally do I'll just use your line..."hey, can I take you to a buffet?"

Anonymous said...

12:05, whatever helps pass on the genetic code is fine with Darwin.

Anonymous said...

3:12, are you thinking that it doesn't even take one single reproductive cycle to have the gene pool change? Skinny as a kid, not-so-skinny as an adult is NOT Darwinian. If that were true, wouldn't a black man turn white before he died simply by moving to Norway? Wouldn't Tom Hanks have developed gills and fins after a few years and swam back to Helen Hunt? Wouldn't we ALL be tubby because we have technology and computer games? C'mon now...I don't know flip about Darwin, but I do know the basics...that the genetic code can change over time and multitudes of generations in response to the environment. Takes more than one or two rolls in the hay to change the fundamentals. Friend, maybe it helps to look everywhere else a person can possibly look before admitting the answer/problem may be found in the mirror. But I guaran-darn-tee you that evolution is not why someone goes from a skinny kid to an overweight adult.

Anonymous said...

I wonder if Darwin ever spanked a Monkey.

Anonymous said...

Fat people make me SICK!

So I quit eating them

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
Irony is dead. Just look at the first comment.

8:06 AM

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That is so untrue. I had a fresh pressed shirt this morning to wear to work. It is still a viable skill.