I Have Discovered A New Mental Disorder

It's called Barnett Shale Tired Head (or "BSTH"), and I hereby claim copyright and trademark and all those other legal words. So everybody else back off.

I can't turn on the TV invention without seeing something about the Barnett Shale. Then there's billboards and the countless newspaper articles. Everybody is getting rich off that stuff except me. Not a dime. (OK, maybe a few bucks from some random oilfield worker gets falsely accused by a trooper of driving while liquored up.) But, in general, mention of the Barnett Shale causes a great deal of depression in my life including Barry tears rolling down my Barry cheeks. I mean, I can hardly breathe when I see terms like "$800 million," above.

Anyway, I'm working on getting "BSTH" included in the DSM-V. If I pull that off, I'll buy my own oil well. Just like Eddie Chiles told me to do when I was a boy.