blank'/> Liberally Lean From The Land Of Dairy Queen: Apocalypse Now

5.20.2011

Apocalypse Now




I've avoided it all week, but I'll let the Rapture take us into the weekend. (#raptureregrets)

And cue up REM's It's The End Of The World As We Know It and Blondie's Rapture.




If you look closely, that's old Dallas circa 1975

55 comments:

Anonymous said...

Notice the truck ad says "it begins May 21, 2011". One question: How long does it last?

Tater Salad said...

So, I reckon Macho Man will be the first in line when I get there tomorrow evening. SWEET! Err, I mean OOOOHHHH YEEEAAHH!!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

This is just a warm for December 21 2012

Bacon said...

Bacon
Can you imagine that these people have reproduced in our world. Sometimes I worry.

Remote Controller said...

There will bean earthquake beginning tomorrow and lasting until Oct. 21st.

I am pumped, usually there isn't much going on in Texas during these months due to the heat.

Tater Salad said...

Quick question, BG. In preparing for this here rapture- If I get all liquored up tonight, steal a patrol car, do donuts and pull broadies around the courthouse, will my "rapture" defense hold up in court? I wouldn't mind a direct response....

Anonymous said...

"begins"? Isn't today always the first day of the rest of your life? And, the last day of the first part of your life?

Anonymous said...

3:23 O not yo momma as a president should have worried you!

Anonymous said...

Ok so here is a quick rundown of their beliefs. Begning at 6pm somewhere in the middle east which is mid morning for us, earthquake. Then normal rapture stuff until Oct. 21. It has already been determined who is going to heaven, you have no control of your salvation. There is no heaven or hell. Once Oct. 21 is over and if you haven't died you simply ie and stop existing.

Anonymous said...

R.E.M!?!?!?

I'd rather hear Freebird. FREEBIRD!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Folks didn't believe Noah, either.

Anonymous said...

Anybody know when the rapture starts tomorrow?

I got a tee time at 1:42 tomorrow at Iron Horse. If the rapture starts before noon or so....I don't want to waste the gas on driving down there.

Anybody......anybody....?

Double Fake Tin Cup

Anonymous said...

I hear someone is predicting a whole lot of shakin' going on. Count me in.

Double Fake Elvis

Anonymous said...

3:34

Of which "court" are you speaking?

Double Fake Bubear

Anonymous said...

Randy Savage was take from us, by our Lord, because he needed an enforcer at the pearly gates. An overflow crowd is expected on Saturday.

Anonymous said...

Do y'all think I should get real high for this rapture thing?

Seems prudent, but I don't have a lot of rapture experience

Anonymous said...

By the time it turns Saturday here, Saturday will be almost over for much of the world. We're well into Saturday right now in eastern Asia.

Anonymous said...

It's noon in Honolulu. Has any called and did anyone answer. And if they answered, is there anyone missing?

Anonymous said...

So does that mean that the only ones left are the Muslims?

Anonymous said...

I hope Loves opens before the rapture.

Anonymous said...

The Rapture is scheduled to start at 5pm Central Saving Time, so you'll make your tee time.

Just watch your language--

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GYbUx6wZ7z4

Anonymous said...

I had a bit of a problem with this very topic for several years. Could not lift anything over 10 pounds. Then a simple surgery solved everything.

Sorry, you didn't say "rupture"? Never mind.

My Other Brother Darryl

Anonymous said...

For sale.

RV with a big decal on the side.

Owners have disappeared.

Available immediately.

Call Double Fake Smith RV.

Anonymous said...

For the last two days, some people around me have already been raptured, as far as I am concerned. If that's how it goes, I'm all for it - Rapture on. I

Anonymous said...

I was so looking forward to see if Arnold Jr. would grow up to become governor of California and marry an anorexic Kennedy bitch. Seeing Obammy lose in a land slide would have been cool too.

Anonymous said...

What denomination prepared this end times thing?

Bet we can guess.

Anonymous said...

What time can the lootig begin?

Anonymous said...

OK, tomorrow when the Rapture doesn't happen, here's a prank we can pull on those who believe it's real.

http://gizmodo.com/5803766/rapture-prank

Anonymous said...

I don't Really give a flying bung drop about all of this. I've been way to close to death for quite a while now and no white light, no voices, none of that other kaka. I already know if God exists I'm going to hell but at least I won't have to be sick anymore.

el chupacabra said...

Last one leaving, don't forget to turn out the lights.

Anonymous said...

7:59 Your words hurt my heart no one should go to hell, hell is not a place you will want to be no you won't be sick but you will wish you were instead of the torment you will be going through, I pray that you will find your way to the savior before your life comes to an end. Confess your are a sinner and ask the Lord to save you it is that simple, you must believe, God loves you and He sent his Son to die for you. So please don't die without the Lord I promise you will regret it the moment you open your eyes in hell.

Anonymous said...

Reeves
Howard
Luttrull
The End

Anonymous said...

It's amazing that even one person buys into these "calculations". They are based on disparate, unrelated dates and time periods scattered throughout a huge book; clumped together into a formula. It's like this: I predict that the Mavs will beat the Thunder in Game 3, 98-94. This is based on the fact that it has been 9,400 days since the Mavs were established, and that Mark Cuban's house has an 8 in the address. Plus, his office was on the fourth floor of a building when he was starting his career. And on the side of an ice cream truck today, I saw a price of $1.00 for a blue bomb. Since the zeroes were in a pair...it obviously means something important, because a guy on the side of the road one day also had a T shirt on that had two zeroes. Therefore, those numbers, when combined in a way that pleases me, CLEARLY indicates the Mavs win by 4. So, go to Vegas and bet all that you have.

Anonymous said...

Let's get our rapture on!!!

Anonymous said...

this rapture thing doesn't mean a thing to you and i; they are targeting the weak minded.

Anonymous said...

Personally, I can't wait for all those people to ascend into heaven so I won't have to wait in such long lines at Wal-Mart.

damn yankee atheist

Anonymous said...

See Ya Later!

el chupacabra said...

I'm still here, but I don't know if that means I'm bad or the endtimers were wrong.
Really, I mean- I don't even hear any traffic outside, but I'm afraid to look out in case rivers of blood are running down the streets and giant scorpion monsters are eating the other bad folks.

Anonymous said...

5:02 is time zone challenged.

Honolulu is 5 hours behind Dallas, not ahead. Noon there is 5 pm here.

Anonymous said...

So what's the big deal about a rupture? I had one once.
DR. Stowers fixed me right up. I only missed a couple of days work.

Anonymous said...

Can I please get an Amen and someone pass me the offering plate. Just make all of the checks out to the new name Jesus gave me...... "Cash"

RPM said...

Giant scorpion monsters? Nobody told me about giant scorpion monsters. This is a gamechanger.

Anonymous said...

I think there is at least one of those hungover owls that portrays the event?

Anonymous said...

It's Saturday 6:26 PM and my husband and I are all alone. Wonder if we got left behind?

Anonymous said...

Will they take folks with barefeet?

Anonymous said...

If you are reading this.....,.,

You are headed for the HOT BUFFET

Anonymous said...

Well, HELL!! I've done been LEFT BEHIND!! Now I have to wait until December 21, 2012.

Anonymous said...

Gordon Keith tweeted "I'm in heaven, where is everybody??"

Anonymous said...

As a kid growing up in the Baptist church in Bridgeport with the nick name "Preacher" I'm sure you didn't fall for this Barry Green. I'm sure you know the bible verse Matthew 24:36 (King James Version)

But of that day and hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels of heaven, but my Father only.


Surley you did by that post rapture pet care for that crazy cat did ya???

Anonymous said...

Barry

Barry

Are you still with us?

Anonymous said...

The end of the world comes everyday for thousands of people. It comes as a heart attack, stroke, cancer, car wreck, gunshot, diabetes, old age, and so on. It will continue like this for about 14 billion years when the earth crashes into the sun. No heaven, no hell, no worry, live for today, be kind to each other.
To quote George Will "I am an agnostic, I'm decisive enough to be an atheist."

Anonymous said...

On December 21 2012 The End...I Garruntee it!

Anonymous said...

HEY!!!!!!!!! Where did you get this last picure!?! I can SWEAR I saw this at the StockShow in the late 80's in the dealer room. Some guy was talking to use about the rapture and such.

Anonymous said...

Sorry, should be I'm not decisive

Anonymous said...

Not Decisive George Will's face would burst open and his brains dribble out if he ever smiled. Grim faced conservative.