Saw This In A Fort Worth Grocery Store Today

And, after looking around, I'm still not sure what a "New Age Drink" is.

A Man Can Get Stabbed Anywhere These Days

You kind of hear about you occasional killing at a downtown Dallas Hip Hop bar or some rundown place off of Harry Hines, but you don't hear about many stabbings that get started in an Uptown bar. (That's normally where I roll with my entourage.) But we have a new entry of getting-killed-in-a-club-where-you-don't-expect-to-be-killed: Tribeca. (And, for Ticket fans, it looks like a place where a bunch of Chris Chris's hang out.) Remember kids, no one got stabbed at Frilly's last night. And, tip number two: Leave your boxcutters at home. Edit: The Dallas Morning News began allowing comments on its stories this week. And, man, they let quite a bit go through. Much more than I thought. The story on this incident is here.

Opening Ceremony

I'm a little in awe . . . you must watch the opening drum ceremony of the Olympics. That was 2,008 Chinese drummers. Bob Costas put it best: "It is both awe inspiring and intimidating." Boy, is it. I had chills. Pics later. I'm rolling TIVO on it.

Decatur Begged To Go To Ranger Game

So odd. Had a guy come in our offices to try and sell Texas Ranger tickets at a discount. Had a pretty good spiel and acted "official." (But I've got him locked in the basement right now dressed up as The Gimp because he violated our "no solicitation" sign.) Then I go up to the courthouse and two nicely dress girls come in the County Attorney's office doing the same thing: Selling Ranger tickets. We have Baseball Chaos breaking out.

That Would Be Some Gold

Just got a call from a Wise County resident (and buddy of mine) who some how, some way is a judge tonight in a Hawaiian Tropic Bikini Contest in Shreveport. He tells me he has his digital camera with him and hopes to send a few along a few pictures "to post under that DQ logo." (Uh, sir. That is not a DQ logo.) Developing . . . Edit: That didn't last. I just got a call that a "massive thunderstorm" has caused sponsor ESPN to cancel the event. ESPN was involved? And a "thunderstorm" and "girls in bikinis" are mutually exclusive? What in the wide world of sports is going on?

Friday Afternoon Pick Me Up

That's Paz Vega who I'm pretty sure was in a quasi-serious Adam Sandler movie. But for Wise County Park standards, I think she needs a little bit more material in her britches. More from that beach outing here.

Random Friday Morning Thoughts

• Saw three women in a VW Bug convertible on College Street this morning. And it was drizzling. Ladies, sometimes you just have to give it up. (But the driver, who looked fairly young, had a scarf on over her head - made me think of Jackie Onassis. Which made me think of Elaine from a Seinfeld episode.)
• The Cowboys are taking a train to San Diego tomorrow. I've never ridden on a train (except that one that used to go around Six Flags when I was a kid - but that can't possibly count.)
• Horrible bus crash this morning in Sherman that killed at least 13. But I've always thought that the bus fire near Dallas that killed 24 during the Hurricane Rita evacuation never got the press it deserved.
• Back to this morning's bus crash: The passengers were from the Vietnamese Martyrs Church of Houston on their way to a mission trip in Carthage, MO. Let the philosophical discussion begin.
• Two unrelated things: The Opening Ceremonies for the Olympics in China are going on right now, and Dustin Hoffman is 71 today.
• The singer Jewel (who I really haven't heard anything about in years) has a 2.200 ranch in Stephenville with now husband Ty Murray.
• What do you do with 2,200 acres?
• I can sew on a button in a way that it's supposed to be done.
• That Osteen trial in Houston really has my attention. And I think she's hot.
• Also about the trial: Heard one of the flight attendant witnesses interviewed yesterday and, is it just me, or do most flight attendants seem a little angry?
• One more thing: In addition to the "victim" claiming that she got hemorrhoids from being elbowed in the breast (the most confusing claim ever), she is also now claiming that the incident caused her to "lose her faith." I'll lose my faith in the justice system if she gets a dime.
• I haven't done one of my "football trips" in a couple of years, and I found a weekend where I could go to the college stadium in Wisconsin (vs. Ohio State) and then go to the stadium in Green Bay (vs. Atlanta) the next day. Debating myself about it.
• The Ticket was talking this morning about one of the local newspapers having a listing of "Best Burgers." For the life of me, I can't find it online. Edit: A reader found it for me.
• Speaking of burgers, someone mentioned this name yesterday that I hadn't heard in years: Mister Buster's.
• I laugh every time I watch Reno 911.
• As good as the Cowboys should be, the team is absolutely doomed if Tony Romo goes down because there is absolutely no back up whatsoever.
• I was listening to Dave Ramsey's radio show yesterday (financial show) and a lady called in with a question about ownership of a condo that was in her mom's name - a mom, according to the caller, who had died the day before. I think I would have called her greedy and hung up.
• Why has Fox 4 traffic guy Chip Waggoner been in studio and not been in the helicopter this week? (Maybe faithful reader and ex-Fox guy Todd Carruth can let us know.)
• Speaking of Fox 4, everyone is making fun of Shaun Rabb for issuing this statement on a story about AIDS earlier this week: "If you've had sex with anyone other than yourself in the last 10 years, you need to be tested."
• A guy died earlier this week in a firey crash on I-30 in Fort Worth which, according to news reports, was horrific (I guess that was self-evident.) Anyway. I drove by it yesterday - it was easy to spot due to all the scorching of the median. Creepy. But I have to admit I was looking for it.
• I have to use a shoehorn to put my dress shoes on.
• It's 08/08/08. I've never really gotten too excited about stuff like that. But this is guaranteed to bring out the comment from the nut case who always writes that the world will end on a particular date
• That outdoor theater at Fair Park is now the Superpages.com Center. I can't begin to recall all the names it has gone by. (Obscure note: The last concert I saw there was New Order.)
• I hope O. Michael Rinke has a bad day.
• Edit: I have no idea what is going on with the "Approved Inferior Blogs" sidebar. They just randomly disappear sometimes.

And Another

Story. (Texas connection.)

Thursday Afternoon Pick Me Up

Whose Who's Working For Runaway Bay PD? Spielberg?

I'm not going to do this justice but here goes. All DWI videos come on DVDs these days. Assuming you can get them to play in a regular DVD player and not just on a computer (no small feat), you really don't have a lot of technological options available. I mean, you're not going to have "scene selection", "alternative audio", or a "director's commentary." Normally the thing just fires up and starts playing. But I just popped one in from Runaway Bay which caused me to waste 10 minutes of my life because it's so freakin' awesome. It immediately fired up and I see a truck with its hazards flashing in front of the cop's car . No problem, I think. I presume the cop is running my guy's DL and we'll see him on the screen in a second. I turned up the volume and started doing other stuff. After a while a take a second look at the screen and see no cop. Man this is taking a long time, I thought. Upon closer inspection I see, down at the bottom (in small letters), the words "Play" and "Scene Selection." Yep, I was just watching an opening menu screen BUT the opening screen was a ten second loop of the first part of the video. So I hadn't been watching a truck sit there in front of the cop car for ten minutes, I had been watching a ten second loop of a truck in front of the cop car. Frustrated yet impressed, I hit "scene selection" just to see what I'd get. I'll be dang, it works. But get this: It popped up six windows and in all six windows there isn't a still shot but part of that scene actually playing. It's like sensory overload. I feel like I'm in Best Buy. I don't know what type of program they have out there at Runaway Bay, but Homeland Security must be throwing a lot of money their way. Edit: Upon reflection, this probably wasn't worth the long post. That O. Michael Rinke has thrown me off my game.

Testing posting pic via phone

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• I could have sworn I was coming down with the flu last night, but then it left me. Weird. Maybe just allergies
• I haven't mentioned the Republicans meeting in the House while its not in session because it is a silly publicity stunt. (And that Rep. Jeb Hensarling, who replaced Charles Stenholm, is a Rush Limbaugh starter kit. He actually said, "Americans can't afford to go on vacation so I don't think it's right that Nancy Pelosi gets to go on vacation." Incredible.)
• I had a craving for Ranch Style Bean last night and went to the store to get some.
• I got to meet Greg "The Hammer" Williams yesterday. What a nice guy.
• Man, I don't understand the "controversy" over the pic of the new Decatur High School Elementary School principal that appeared in the Messenger. I thought it was great and just fun.
• Joel Osteen's wife is being sued in a silly lawsuit after she got a little snippy on an airplane. A flight attendant claims she was pushed which caused, and I'm not making this up, anxiety and hemorrhoids. And the story also says she wants 10% of Olsteen's net worth in punitive damages. I hope she doesn't get a dime.
• I was involved in a funny bit yesterday at the courthouse as we tried to recreate what it will be like if Joel Osteen is called as a witness. We could just see an enthralled and smiling jury as Joel testifies (and you have to do this with a Joel voice), "Yes my wife can have a temper but God didn't make us sheep, now did He? He gave us emotions and wants us to express them. Now my dear wife, who has the patience of Job after putting up with me all these years, might get a little angry when I don't take out the trash or won't turn off the television, but she wouldn't raise a hand to another soul. God doesn't work within us like that. Does He?"
• Thank goodness our long National Nightmare is over since Brett Favre signed with the Jets last night. (But I always pronounce his name as Fafffraaaa ever since I saw Something About Mary.)
• Speaking of that movie, that "Seven Minute Abs" scene makes me laugh every time
• I wonder if that pic above will enlarge?
• I actually heard the AOL alert at the courthouse yesterday when the words, "You've got mail!" came over a computer speaker. Hadn't heard that in years.
• Overnight news: "Police said it appears a 44-year-old man killed his wife and their 14-year-old daughter before turning the gun on himself this week in their North Fort Worth home."Man, there are a lot of murder-suicides these days.
• I haven't been to downtown Fort Worth in a while. I used to go all the time.
• I feel sorry for people that have to hire me to defend them against a simple marijuana possession charge.
• I always thought there was a greater chance of Speedo Man whipping my arse than getting a letter from a Dairy Queen lawyer.
• I once prosecuted a guy for robbing the Dairy Queen in Rhome. He actually went to prison. He was not a criminal mastermind.
• Remember when Dallas tried to get the rights to the 2012 Olympics? Yep, a marathon in 104 degree temperature would be swell.
• Twenty-six cheerleaders (yep, 26) got stuck in the same elevator in Austin yesterday. I'm pretty sure I saw that in a movie on Cinemax last weekend.

He Hates Us For Our Freedom - Blog Under Attack!

From the email bag (and I am not making this up):

Barry, Your blog has come to our attention, and we have concerns about your use of our trademarks in your heading. American Dairy Queen Corporation (ADQ) is the owner of the federally registered marks Dairy Queen and the ellipse shaped logo. These trademarks are very important and valuable assets within the Dairy Queen system. You are using our marks in a way that may lead some to believe there is an association or endorsement or similar arrangement with our company. We are flattered that you had Dairy Queen in mind when creating your site, but we do have a responsibility to limit and control the use of these trademarks. As an author, we hope you will understand our situation and respect the intellectual property owned by another. We request that you remove these two marks from your blog. Please feel free to contact me with any questions. Thank you.

Sincerely,

AMERICAN DAIRY QUEEN CORPORATION 
 O. Michael Rinke President and Assistant General Counsel
952/***-**** 
952/***-**** (Fax)

I'm probably responsible for more free advertising and the sale of more Hungr' Busters (which is probably a registered trademark) than any guy in the history of Dairy Queen. And this is the thanks I get? Would O. Michael Rinke rather me go on an anti-Dairy Queen rant every single day (which, the last time I checked, would be protected speech under one of those amendment thingies to the U.S. Constitution?) It's a dark day in the America, folks. I've called an emergency meeting with myself at 7:00 a.m. tomorrow morning to discuss this matter with myself. But I can see a landmark U.S. Supreme Court case coming: American Dairy Queen Corporation v. Liberally Lean From The Land Of Dairy Queen. I'm even working on my oral argument: "Over? Did you say 'over'? Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell no! But I'm not gonna stand here and let O. Michael Rinke bad mouth the United States of America!" (But that may be the nicest "lawyer letter" I've ever received.)

I Can't Tell You How Good This Is

HBO premiered its series tonight which follows the Cowboys in training camp in Oxnard, CA. If you even have a passing interest in the team, you have to see this show. I pretty much put the NFL on the back burner about 10 years ago, but this thing even excited me. Good. Stuff. (Extreme sidenote: That tight end from Texas A&M might be a bust.)

Now This Is News

We've got a confirmed sighting of the Google Street View Van going up and down the streets of Decatur taking pictures. (If anybody grabs a pic of the van taking pics then send me that pic.)

Rumor and Speculation

This is the hotel under construction behind the Decatur McDonald's which I think is going to be a Four Seasons or Anatole or Motel 6. Not sure. But someone made a comment the other day asking whether anyone had noticed that "construction had suddenly stopped." I really hadn't noticed it, but when I drove by it a second ago there sure wasn't any activity. Any validity to this? What a mess it would be if it became an eyesore or all eyesores.

And Another

It's been a while since I've gone back to the well of the "And Another" teacher scandal bit, but this one gets me back on track. It actually involved only text messaging but, trust me, it has a couple of "oh, my" factors that make it worthy of its own post. Once again, its just a situation of a hot teacher temporarily having her moral compass malfunction. So what if she taught in a Christian school, tried to seduce a female, and had her husband involved. [Insert sound effect of needle scraping across a playing record.] Wait. Let me reassess this.

Can You Say "Oscar"?

My day just got a little bit better. Story