Lap Band Surgery Can Turn You Into That?

Yahooty. (From today's Dallas Morning News, p. 14A.)

Oh, My Aching Back

So I finish going over the plea papers with an inmate at the courthouse this morning. After having done a stellar job of explaining what those 15 pages meant, I stood up. At that point, I felt like I had been shot in the back with a lawn dart. I couldn't move. I grabbed a pillar for support. Man, my back hurt and I didn't know why. But the inmate saw what was happening. "You OK, man?" "You, OK?". He even reached up to grab me in the event I tumbled over like an old man. The irony did strike me, however. The inmate had just signed up to do 4 years in the pen for a couple of burglaries. And he was concerned about me.

People Aren't Mature Enough For Live TV

Warning: One prominently placed F Bomb.

No Words

This photo was featured on ABC's World News Tonight. (Background.)

Saw This Full Page Time Waste In The Star Telegram Today

I would like to distance from Paula White. (Ad here.)

Quizno's Part Deux

So I get some gas at that 7-11 at Western Center Blvd. and I-35 and get claustrophobic about how tight it is. I hate driving around in that place because its almost impossible to maneuver.

Then I spot this concrete base of a light post that has been beaten to death. I've almost backed into it myself a time or two.

I Guess We All Handle It Differently

Awful story in the Star Telegram about this pregnant Anna ISD kindergarten teacher who was killed in an auto wreck this morning.

But, at the risk of sounding callous, this line from the story bothered me: "Dallas lawyer Scott Palmer, who has been retained by Selkirk’s husband, confirmed that the teacher was 15 weeks pregnant."

One of the first things you do is retain a lawyer?

Edit: Didn't post one comment of a fictitious conversation between lawyer and client in this case. That, sir, was simply way over the top.

A Penny For Your Thoughts

After the driver's license hearing, I stopped by the Quizno's at Western Center Blvd. My bill came to $7.01 and the cashier nicely asked me if I had a penny. I fumbled through my pants and found no change. He then looked down at the "take a penny/give a penny cup" and saw that it was empty.

So I ended up with him giving me 99 cents in change.

Sheeesh.

Death Trap On The Way To Fort Worth

These pics don't do it justice, but I bet this "pole" (or whatever the heck it is) extended a good 10' off the rear of that truck. And it was head high.

I Learned Something Very Important On Saturday

The next time I'm sliding upside down while driving down 287, do not get into the grass. And what is up with all the fans throwing beers bottles at Jeff Gordon yesterday? That sort of thing should only happen in Europe or if Decatur beats Bridgeport by more than 20.

Where In The World Is Matt Lauer

The Today Show has started up the "where in the world" series this week with Matt Lauer's first stop being at the Boeing manufacturing plant in Washington State.

But I stopped down this morning when they showed Matt flying a simulator for a Boeing 767 (or something like that) with the music of Ludacris' "Move, bitch, get out the way" playing in the background. Yep, they dropped the "bitch" from the lyrics but it was kinda odd.

That's A Mess

The bridge that collapsed in San Francisco this weekend.

More pics here.

Google satellite of the mass of freeways at that location is here.

It'll Be All Right, Avery. I'll Hold You.

It would be a miracle if the Mavs can win three in a row to get out of this debacle, but if they don't, the window for an NBA Championship has closed. Every team probably has a peak of three to four years. Last year might have been the best chance ever. Considering this year's disaster, next year won't be any better.

Edit: And don't rule out God punishing Mark Cuban for this.

Unstable On A Couple Of Levels

A baby, held by an amateur sumo wrestler, takes part in a baby-crying contest at Sensoji temple in Tokyo April 28, 2007. Eighty-four babies born in 2006 took part in the event, which is held to pray for the babies' health and growth. The winner of the contest is the baby who cries the loudest. REUTERS/Toru Hanai (JAPAN)

Not Much News This Morning

Mavs lose. And Kate Bosworth (although I'm really not sure who she is) went swimming.

With The 112th Pick In The Draft . . .

. . . the Pittsburgh Steelers select Baylor punter Daniel Sepulveda.

Pencil them in for Super Bowl. That man has had to punt, according to my calculations, 7,697 times for Baylor. God has blessed his thigh.

Cuban On Suicide Watch

"If we lose [today], this season is pretty much over," Dirk Nowitzki said Saturday.

Man, this could be the biggest collapse in Dallas history. I'm still not convinced it will happen, but something is definitely wrong.

Central Expressway De-Greened

Crews have begun removing shrubbery in the medians due to cost of maintenance. Kinda sad.

When I worked in Dallas in the late 1980s, I routinely drove up and down Central. Back then it was two lanes each way with entrance ramps about as long as a typical driveway. It's amazing now.