6.20.2007

Thou Shalt Not Commit Road Rage


The Vatican released a very odd document yesterday which serves as The Ten Commandments For Driving. But as I glanced through them, I noticed nothing about driving while intoxicated.

Uh, oh. I expect to see the following very shortly:

(AP) Dallas - Mother's Against Drunk Driving (MADD) issued a press release today denouncing the Vatican's omission of the sin of drunk driving from its new Ten Commandments For Driving. "We are outraged," said MADD president Glynn Birch. "We always suspected those Catholics hit the bottle too much, but how can you omit DWI from that list?" There was some speculation that MADD might place pressure on the Church to remove Pope Benedict XVI from his papal position. "Look, we've been bullying prosecutors for years, and it won't be the first time that we've cost someone their job for not doing exactly what we tell them to do." Birch added. "Even though the Vatican almost has as much money and power as MADD, we have God on our side. They will listen or face our wrath which, as we have demonstrated, can be merciless. And while we're at it, we'll probably have them start substituting grape juice for communion. That's bugged us for quite a while."

Edit: And look what happened on the same day as the Commandments were released.