12.28.2006

Uuggghhh

Ok, it happened again at lunch today. Dear Dallas Morning News Guy: You have tormented me all year. I don't ask much from you - just that a single copy of the Morning News be in either of the two news racks across from the Messenger office. Yeah, I know I could subscribe. Yeah, I know I could pick it up earlier. But I want my paper at noon. I'm a creature of habit that does the same thing every day. I want to read the paper at lunch, not at breakfast, not at dinner, not at the crack of dawn. At lunch. You offer it for 50 cents, and even though you demand exactly two quarters and not "any combination of coins", I am gladly willing to pay it. Heck, I consider it a bargain. Even the Messenger and the Bridgeport Index charge 75 cents. (The Index!!!!!) But you seem to get some sadistic joy in having me walk the two blocks down to the rack only to find it empty. And don't think I'm not aware that you haven't replaced the alternative rack outside of the old Mattie's restuaruant even though Sweetie Pie's, despite its goofy name, causes a ton of people to walk by it everyday. So let this serve as notice that I won't put up with it in 2007. No more Mr. Nice Guy. You hear me? I've been on the verge of losing it for several years and next year could be the year. So if you don't want me to wrap a chain around your news rack and drag it down FM 730 until its beaten to a pulp of twisted metal left for dead in downtown Boyd, then put enough freakin' papers in there to last all day. Or, at the very least, until noon. In Christian Love, BSG

11 comments:

greta said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
greta said...

You are too funny! I bet that paper boy is scared of you now that you've threatened to drag his rack all the way to Boyd. LOL

Anonymous said...

I will help you Barry. That old trout Mother Sheehan busted again, Nifong censured, Saddam to the gallows on Sunday and the Dow Jones keeps setting records The good news just keeps rolling in. Glad I could save you 50 cents.

Anonymous said...

Hey Barry, Don't listen to TxSheehan. The sky is not falling. The only thing you and Snoop Dog will need an umbrella for is drizzle.

Anonymous said...

Barry,
Nothing that Belo prints is worth such emotion. Consider yourself lucky not to be exposed to such a weak excuse for a newspaper.

Anonymous said...

Hey Barry, you ever wonder why they call it the Dallas "MORNING" News and not the Dallas "NOON" News -- get there earlier!

wordkyle said...

Maybe the newspaper guy HAS stocked extra papers and your enemies keep buying them all before you get there, just so you won't have one.

Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean people aren't....you know.

Anonymous said...

Barry,
Please consider it God's way of sending not too subtle message that you should not be reading such propaganda!

Anonymous said...

Try BUYING the paper in the morning, but not READING it until noon.

mzchief said...

To Barry...
Ahhhh...Uhhhhh...I am CERTAIN you NEED someone OTHER than the paperboy to HELP you work through YOUR newspaper ISSUES.
*;)

I thought the DMN posts ALL of the IMPORTANT "news" on their website?

Anonymous said...

Good gosh Barry, can't you go online and read the paper?

What's the big deal here?