Say What?

The first paragraph of a press release from a Dallas County sheriff candidate:

DALLAS COUNTY – Dallas County sheriff candidate Lowell Cannaday has raised $40,000 for his first fundraising event to take place Monday evening, an amount he also reported in his quarterly campaign finance report filed earlier Monday.

Read it until your head spins. All I can think about is Donnie Darko-like worm holes and time traveling.

Things Are Hot and Heavy In Runaway Bay

Got a report that the electricity is out in some parts of Runaway Bay. "Might" be back on by 2:00 p.m. Yep, the news can get a bit slow in the summer.

More Mug Shot Fun

I'm never a fan of T-shirts with "slogans" on them, but they can be entertaining in mug shots. Ten of them begin here.

A Genuine Award

Ok, I give up. Who is Bert Ford and why is an award named after him?

And would it be inappropriate to go hit Sixth Street after the award ceremony?

Ralph Is Either Drunk Or Stupid. Or Both

It's a little hard to see him when the clip first starts. You'll find him at the top of the ladder.

Britney says,

"Don't worry Precious. I won't let you near that nasty ol' animal shelter in Decatur."

47 Days Until College Football Season

The pic is a screenshot I took during last year's Baylor v. The Evil Empire game. Baylor had just scored on a bomb and a field goal and then followed it up with an interception. This girl was caught looking at the scoreboard with an expression of, "We are playing Baylor, aren't we?" I was so happy at that moment, but I knew the game would end as horribly as a date with Christina Aguilera. And it did.

I'm Rethinking . . .

. . . my desire to run with the bulls.

Phoebe Cates is 33 44 Today

This should be a national holiday. For many guys across the nation, that 15 seconds of Fast Times at Ridgemont High may be the greatest moment in the history of film. How she didn't win an Oscar for that scene alone is a tragedy.

Searched Flickr . . .

. . . for "Bridgeport" and "Texas" and this came up.

Random Cowboy Note

His name might be in the Cowboy's Ring of Honor but it is not on his grave site.

Hey, Now

Britney from this weekend. (It's clickable.)

Duke's

I don't know where "Duke's" is in Bedford, but the cops sure do. I was at a driver's license hearing today in Fort Worth and heard two cops talking about it. The Bedford cop was proclaiming how busy the cops had become since it opened up (meaning lots of DWI arrests). Bedford cop: "In fact, I'm here today on stop out of Duke's." Saginaw cop: "Me, too!"

"They Tried To Make Me Go To Rehab"

Lindsay Lohan got out of rehab on Saturday and then went to some club in Las Vegas called "Pure". (That her in the pic.) No drinking. Just Red Bull. Lots of Red Bull. I bet she still hasn't gone to sleep.

And I think my fifth bride wore that exact same skirt to our wedding.

Bullish On Bulls

Man, you have to watch this short CNN video (after a very short commercial) about the Running of the Bulls last week. Apparently, one of the bulls did a U-turn and caused some major carnage. And if you hate carnage, you do NOT want to click on this link. (He's OK, by the way. Saw him on The Today Show this morning.)

Kim Kardashian says,

"I picked up this towel at the Dollar Store in Decatur. Women must be smaller in Decatur than what I'm used to."

Sorry For The Slow Weekend Posting

I spent my weekend dressed up as something riding an ostrich amongst cheerleaders that can't dance during a Mexican baseball game.

Martians!

Actually this is a headline from the Star Telegram in the 1940s. The story really isn't very interesting, but I had never heard of it.