Best. Buy. Power. Down.

So for whatever reason, my DirecTV has been on the blink. I'm not getting about half the channels (which has been kind of refreshing since I'm watching stuff I've never seen before) but that joy came to an end a few hours ago when I realized I couldn't get the TCU/BYU game tonight. Unacceptable. I'm kind of weird because I went out five years ago and bought one of those fancy flat panel HD televisions. That's not the part that's weird. The fact that I've never subscribed to an HD provider is weird. But this technical glitch was the incentive I needed. So I went over to the new Best Buy off of Heritage Trail in north Fort Worth to sign up for HD DirectTV. First I looked at all the HD TVs just for fun and realized they were selling for about a 1/3 of what I paid a few years back. OK, I can deal with that. I was going high-tech. I was going to be a new man. But then I walk over to the "DirecTV HD" booth (yep, they've got one) only to find no one there. No biggie. I looked around and saw the above receivers (those are my pics) and instantly contracted a severe case of Confused Head. Yeah, I understand the DVR. I understand the dual DVR. But do I need one of those HD receivers for every television? What if one of my other televisions isn't HD? Do I really have to buy this equipment? Ugh. But a nice salesman showed up so I told him I wanted DirecTV HD but I had a question about this receiver business. "How's all this work?" I asked. He says, and I'm not making this up, "I'm not sure. Basically you buy the box from us and then go home and call them." I'm pretty sure you could you see the life force drain from me. I was there. I was ready to spend money. I just wanted someone to tell me what I needed to do. Heck, rip me off! Just give me some solid information that I could believe in. "Uh, OK, " I said - still not willing to give up. "Do I need a receiver for every TV?" He leans down and looks at the dual DVR (which I think means you can watch one channel while a different channel is recorded) and he says, "Naaa, I'm pretty sure you can hook two TVs up to this. " Not only did that not answer the question, I'm pretty sure that answer was flat out Crazy Talk. I was done. "OK, let me look around a little bit." And then I high tailed it out of there (Editor's note: That's what we call a Random Thoughts "call back joke.") Can anybody help a brother out?