- This is judge showboating. The criminal cases are as dead as Epstein. Any "hearing" of any type is just for the press.
- I noticed on the Tarrant County trial board that two defendants are being tried jointly in front of one jury in a misdemeanor case of "Interference with Public Duties." Without knowing a single fact, I feel comfortable in saying that's a recipe for disaster for the prosecution.
- Interesting Andrew Luck gambling tidbits: (1) Before his retirement was announced, the over/under on Colts season wins was 9.5. It then plummeted to 6.5. That had to be a mad, mad scramble by sports books to change those odds when the news broke - I read somewhere that most were able to do it within 10 minutes. (2) At least one guy in July thought it would be worth betting on Luck to be the NFL's MVP.
- By the way, you need to know that, as a Sports Expert, I'm working on a very hot prediction on the Dallas Cowboys over/under. I've just got to run a few more numbers through my IBM Mainframe. (May I remind you that when the rest of you thought the Rangers were great before the All Star break, I told you it was a "mirage").
- We finally found out who the troopers were who were involved in the fatal shooting in South Dallas. They weren't from Wise County but pretty close.
- I've caught the first two episodes of HBO's new show, The Righteous Gemstones, and it's pretty, pretty funny. (It helps that I picture Joel Osteen while watching it.)
- Hot Sports Opinion: Other than the opening credits and the ending, ESPN's College Game Day is boring. (And Lee Corso's deterioration is making the ending difficult to watch.)
- I don't know who writes these "tips" for the Texas Criminal Defense Lawyers Association, but they are "invariably" awful. I've never had a client ask for money back once a case was over and cannot envision a situation where they would want money back after an "awesome result." But it happens to the author of the post below "invariably" (which means "in every case or on every occasion.") And he says give the money back even though you delivered?
- Some people steal baby food out of desperation, others drive a Mercedes to a spa in order to steal Botox using a Mikata.
- Whether it be a school superintendent, police chief, city councilman, or mayor, Dallas always has the most clueless and wheels off leaders. Yesterday, the new mayor thought it would be a good idea to announce that he has a new side gig as a partner in a major Dallas law firm in their public financing division. These are the sort of things that are envisioned when you think of "appearance of impropriety." (One of his excuses was that he wanted to keep his law license active. Sheesh. Pay $250 a year and watch some continuing legal education online and you're good to go.)
- The Longhorns will honor Cedric Benson with a "32" sticker on their helmets. Here's a suggestion: Clean that mess up. We know you play in the U.S. We know where Austin is. We know you're in the Big 12. And you number is in big letters on your jersey. For arguably the best uniform in all of college football, the back of the helmet is a disaster.
- A conservative Super PAC has set up a tents outside of DPS driver's license"megacenters" in Hurst and Fort Worth and asking people to sign a petition. I honestly have no idea if they need permission to be on what is obviously public property.
- Who would have though Alabama coach Nick Saban has a better perspective on criminal justice than most prosecutors?
8.27.2019
Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts
8.26.2019
Random Monday Morning Thoughts
- We had yet another shooting last night in Wise County that resulted in a death. The Messenger says it arose out of a rooster fighting incident (?!) but then revised it to a card game after the cockfighting. This is the only arrest and charges associated with it the incident and murder isn't one of them. (And I'm not sure how only one person gets arrested for engaging in organized crime since it requires an agreement with one or more other people.)
- The Dallas PD released a propaganda video this morning as they just "happened" to be filming when the Chief of Police came back to work. She just casually stopped down to say a few words. (Uh, she has a driver?)
- The photo of Melania, the Canadian Prime Minister and Trump could replace that old and popular meme.
- But this may be my favorite pic.

Step Brothers (2008) - The boys in the oil patch make a lot of money, but they are going to earn it today.
- I have to issue one correction on my Zeke/Cowboys negotiation rules. The Cowboys could void this year's contract (the final year of his mandated first four year contract) of $3 million and renegotiate it if they wanted to. The first three years were set in stone, but not this year. That's buried in the collective bargaining contract.
- Jesse Watters of Fox News finally became engaged to his mistress. He left the mother of his twin girls last year after having an affair with this then 25-year-old junior employee on his show (who had to be transferred to another show due to Fox News’ sexual harassment policies.)
- This story of the 26 pound cat was going around last week. Let me tell you something. I own a 22 pound cat. A 22 pound cat is a friend of mine. You, sir, are no 26 pound cat. (You might be pushing 35 pounds or more.)
- Everyone had hot sports opinions about Colts' Andrew Luck walking away from the NFL in the prime of his career with many thinking it is the "biggest story" in at least the last 10 years. This was a pretty funny retort. (Yep, it happened.)
- I hope there's more to this story, but the story doesn't say if there is more to this story. (And it was just a municipal judge.)
- There was never more proof that if a big news story happens on Friday evening we won't learn anything about it at all because there are only skeleton news crews on duty for the next two days. We know this story out of Waxahachie has lots of questions -- it's answers we want:
- Quick loading video time: (1) Lightening striking a tree and injuring several at the PGA event this weekend, (2) The end of the Arizona/Hawaii game where Arizona needed to get 31 yards to tie and got 30, (3) Andrew Luck being booed as he walked off the field after his retirement news broke, (4) Defendant slugs his own lawyer in the courtroom.
- This morning's traffic report on three problem areas:
- Time to remind you that DPS has enough money to have gun boats on the Rio Grande with twin 250 horse power engines.
- Why don't you Google "Elected leaders, because of their reckless rhetoric, enable nutcases with AR-15s to murder brown people "?
- Here's a little constitutional fun fact for you. Not only was that less than 100 years ago, it only applied to white women.
- Messenger: Above the Fold
- Those are two big stories in the Houston Chronicle: (1) DPS Troopers are buying weapons from the Department and unloading them on the open market, and (2) an alleged mass murderer goes to trial in a case that has gone basically unnoticed in the metroplex.
8.23.2019
It's Friday. Let's Get Out Of Here.
See...I’m not the only one...😂😂 pic.twitter.com/GNtTGfFiZz
— DJ Jazzy Jeff (@djjazzyjeff215) August 18, 2019
Majestic mattress flight at Denver’s 'open air bed' cinema gone wrong. Quite a sight. pic.twitter.com/p00FcTB8P6
— Juris (@JurisAbramenko) August 20, 2019
This did not go well. #AnimalThunderdome pic.twitter.com/6pa9zEPzOL
— Clay Travis (@ClayTravis) August 19, 2019
Listen to how badly this dude just biffed the end of God Bless America pic.twitter.com/eCmM5IPfir
— Cooper Lund (@cooperlund) August 18, 2019
Sports...💪😍😏 pic.twitter.com/LmZTuZZAQz
— Rex Chapman🏇🏼 (@RexChapman) August 22, 2019
Random Friday Morning Thoughts
- I told you that Texas Monthly cover story on Robert Jeffress wasn't very good. And here's huge confirmation: Jeffress is promoting it. (And, dude, you want to at least make a little bit of an effort on your appearance if you're going to appear on TV?)
- I used to rattle of "Oh, my!" quite a bit but I haven't used it lately. It officially needs to come out retirement based upon this photo that somehow made it to print in the Austin American Statesman. (Or, on second thought, maybe it needed to make it to print as a commentary on society.)
- State Rep. Dan Crenshaw promoted that he'll "run his district" but inadvertently revealed how he's only elected due to gerrymandering.
- There was a motorcycle death in Grand Prairie last night after a collision with car. The car looks maybe worse.
- Greg Abbott did a photo op yesterday for the new "task force" in light of the El Paso Massacre. Make no mistake about it -- they'll do absolutely nothing. This is only for show. He did the exact same thing after the Santa Fe School Massacre.
- And it was discovered Abbott sent out an anti-immigration fundraising letter days before the El Paso mass shooting urging people to "DEFEND TEXAS NOW" and to "take matters into your own hands."
- This is the actual opening paragraph in an opinion released yesterday out of the 11th federal circuit court of appeals. That's just a super-casual judge.
- Luke Wilson will star in the film adaption of 12 Mighty Orphans which is a fantastic book if, for anything, a lot of Fort Worth history.
- The good: The public will now have online access to every piece of paper electronically filed in every civil case in Texas. The bad news is that it costs 10 cents a page just to see any individual filing with a cap of $6 per document filed. That's robbery. Lawyers are already paying ridiculous fees for the "convenience" of e-filing. And now the public has to pay to see those e-filings? And, according to the story, "that money goes to the court clerk where the document originated." Why?
- The alleged murderer of the girl whose body was found in a burning SUV on lower Greenville is so fat that he can't fit into a jail jumpsuit.
- That case is disturbing but a dismissed misdemeanor assault case involving a shove isn't exactly a predictor of capital murder. This tweet is a reach. (I don't think Fox 4 even aired anything about it.)
- My desire to immediately walk away and retire to a humble jungle shack in Costa Rica was revived yesterday with the news of the death of 21 year old Luke Laufenburg: "The family’s statement said that Luke had been declared cancer-free on May 3, 2018. In January 2019 he was awarded a scholarship by UTEP, and was expected to start at tight end for the school’s football team this fall. But the cancer recurred on April 5 of this year, and on July 12th his condition was diagnosed as terminal."
- I absolutely hate Google's new search results layout under its news tab. They completely destroyed it.
- While it was no surprise that it was announced yesterday that Sarah Sanders was joining Fox News (what's changed?), it dawned on me we've heard nothing from her replacement.
- Last night the media gathered around New York Giants rookie quarterback. To the right is Eli Manning putting on his shoes.
- In one of the weirder stories yesterday was the CEO of Overstock.com being fired for revealing a relationship with Russian agent turned convict Maria Butina and for oddly talking about the "deep state." And then it got even more bizarre as he appeared on Fox News and CNN last night claiming the affair and "political espionage" was ordered by FBI agent Peter Strzok. (He was so crazy and confrontational on Fox Business that one of the panel of reporters taunted him with, "Hows it feel to see the stock of Overstock climbing since you got fired?" That's in the link.)
- This morning: A Koch brother has died.
8.22.2019
Random Thursday Morning Thoughts
- I don't know how an unnamed fast food restaurant's chicken sandwich has become an online national sensation, but it is the greatest marketing schemes/scams I've seen in over a decade.
- What going on here? "She was part of a prominent Dallas family and had recently graduated from the University of Arkansas." Update: A 49 year old has been arrested.
- It sounds ghoulish, but I'm surprised more people don't kill themselves if they've committed a that kind of crime, finally get caught, and then absolutely believe they are going to prison for a long time. But it's pretty bizarre to do it in the Sheriff's office parking lot. (I remember about ten years ago Wise County guy killed himself in his driveway after learning of similar charges out of Tarrant County.)
- Speaking of ghoulish, Texas executed another person last night.
- There's an article about a Wood County judge and his "quick temper" going around. He's not perfect or particularly likable, but I've seen a lot worse. For example, he got in trouble for calling a lawyer a liar after he didn't show up for a court. And he's probably justified. Ask any court staff member if there aren't a certain number of lawyers who are known liars about "not getting notice".
- I guess I wasn't the only one to think "anti-Christ" after Trump's comments yesterday. Here's Twitter's "trending" in the afternoon:
- I may just play this nonstop:
- President of the United States declares: "I Am The Chosen One" pic.twitter.com/mgppIViNPk— Timothy Burke (@bubbaprog) August 21, 2019
- I wrote this last Friday. Coincidence?
- Yesterday I pointed out that the Dallas Police Chief has been off the job for almost two months, and later in the day she announced she's coming back to work. Coincidence?
- On Monday, I wrote about how Love Field used to have a skating rink and movie theater. Yesterday, the Ticket's Hardline dedicated a whole segment to that subject. Coincidence?
- If you notice the lack of troopers on the roads of Wise County, I've been told there is a reason: A bunch of them have been assigned to patrol South Dallas to help out Dallas P.D.
- For the life of me, I do not understand why Bob Stoops came out of retirement to coach an XFL team. Sheesh, even Kliff Kingsbury could get an NFL head coaching job.
- This is so clever it could almost be a cover on the now defunct Mad Magazine:
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