3.15.2016

Sarah Palin Is Crazy



Her husband is in ICU after a snowmobile accident and she shows up at a Donald Trump event.

The video doesn't catch all of this but this is the full text:  "It’s good to be here, thawing out, from Alaska. Literally, I’m thawing out. Before getting on a flight up here, I was ice fishing on my frozen lake. And my husband was out snowmachining, and thank you guys for your prayers for my husband who is recovering right now in ICU after a little wreck on a snowmachine, so thank you. Big wreck. Thank you. But, uh, you know, when real life happens, right? When somebody is sick in your family, there’s an accident that happens, all these struggles… all these real life issues that happen, it really puts things in perspective, doesn’t it? And doesn’t it make you appreciate your time? Time is our most valuable resource. And it makes me appreciate the time that we have to spend in doing something so worthy, and that’s to get Donald J. Trump elected President. And what we don’t have time for is all that petty, punk ass little thuggery stuff that’s been going on with these quote-unquote protesters who are doing nothing but wasting your time."
at 11:44 AM

Sir!


at 9:18 AM

Johnny Football Is In Rehab Again.

Check that. He's in the club!

at 9:04 AM

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts



  • Liberally Lean Pic' Em Tournament. Funniest name so far is "Foul Hooked Catfish" which is a callback joke from Random Thoughts last week. (Pay the man, Shirley.)
  • "A Weatherford High School senior was killed Monday morning in a hunting accident in Wise County, a spokesman for the Texas Parks and Wildlife Department confirmed." I wonder if it was part of the tournament that is going on.
  • Trump might very well win, for all intents and purposes, the Republican nomination tonight. 
  • I once sent out a press release as DA and used the phrase "intensive purposes" because that is what I thought the phrase was. The Messenger corrected it for me before it went to press.
  • Jeff Miller, the NFL’s senior vice president for health and safety, acknowledged a causal relationship between football-related head trauma and chronic traumatic encephalopathy Monday. Three thoughts: (1) Finally, (2) I wonder if this admission was authorized and, if not, did Roger Goodell had a heart attack?, and (3) This was during a "roundtable discussion on concussions convened by the U.S. House of Representatives Committee on Energy and Commerce"  That committee was discussing the NFL? 
  • Has the Fort Worth PD pepper spraying cop been fired yet?
  • The Senior In The House woke up yesterday, put on big dark glasses, and walked the dog. Her normally pretty hair was a mess. She looked just like the daughter in Vacation.
  • I can't remember the product, but I heard a radio commercial this morning that referenced "intelligent molecules". Idiocracy.
  • I missed the story yesterday of the guy who fled from the cops and was found in a barn in Wise County after a dog was used to locate him.  We had a regular John Wilkes Booth there. At least the barn wasn't set on fire. (Sidenote: Manhunt: The 12-Day Chase for Lincoln's Killer by James L. Swanson is one of the best history books I've ever read.)
  • Supreme Court justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg turns 83 today.
  • Mrs. LL is wearing out the kayak. I told her she's going to have arms like Hulk Hogan before the summer is over. 
  • I watched an old 30 for 30 on the USFL this weekend and it is a must see for any football fan. And then it turns its cross-hairs and Donald Trump who basically destroyed the league. There is nothing more entertaining when they show him the check from the NFL and the USFL sued them. The jury verdict was one dollar. 


at 8:39 AM

3.14.2016

Double Oh, My!

http://www.star-telegram.com/news/local/community/fort-worth/article65967552.html
at 4:07 PM

In Case You Missed It



Man, the Secret Service was all over it.

(But that is one redneck crowd. Language warning.)
at 8:51 AM

Random Monday Morning Thoughts


  • I'll have The Official Liberally Lean NCAA Basketball Bracket For College Teams Which Has No Prize [insert trademark] up in a few minutes.  Edit: It should be here. Tell me if you have any problems, and please vote responsibly. And get those funny names ready.
  • CBS decided to make it a two hour presentation of the seedings for the tournament and then someone decided to release an absolutely accurate bracket on Twitter that had been leaked.
  • Baylor plays Yale in the first round. That will be the whitest crowd in the history of ever. 
  • I've developed a serious case of the hiccups and they keep coming back. That hasn't happened in years. 
  • I caught another fish! Yay! It swallowed the entire lure. Boo!
  • "Alabama deputy shoots dog after man loses everything in trailer fire, arrests him for disorderly conduct, on video"
  • An off-duty Farmer's Branch officer shot and killed a 16 year old in Addison last night. 
  • "At Austin event, Mark Cuban calls Ted Cruz ‘worst politician in Texas’"
  • I repaired a bed this weekend which had slats that had collapsed. I used 2x4s, a circular saw, and a Mikata drill. Mrs. LL said there is no way it will hold up. I bet money that it would and gave her 10 to 1 odds. I forgot the supports underneath and I hope it held up or this will be expensive.
  • I've never understood the media saying they have an "exclusive interview". Isn't that 99% of interviews?
  • Texas has gone from a drought to a rain forest.
  • Mrs. LL knew where I went on Saturday and asked me about it, and I have no idea how she knew. I actually laughed. I've got nothing to hide and that's a good feeling. 
  • The end of the Oklahoma/WVU game was incredible. I'll name it "The Shot That Never Was."
  • Uncovered: In November a pastor called for the execution of gays and then introduced Ted Cruz. "Kevin Swanson: Yes, Romans Chapter 1 verse 32 the Apostle Paul does says [sic] that homosexuals are worthy of death. His words not mine! And I am not ashamed of the Gospel of Jesus Christ! And I am not ashamed of the truth of the word of God. And I am willing to go to jail…."


at 8:31 AM

3.11.2016

Whoa!


at 2:15 PM

After Two Years, Johnny Football Is Out Of Job


at 12:55 PM

Bernie Bits!


at 11:36 AM

Trump Rally This Morning Goes All Gangsta




Language warning.

(There is so much going on in this short clip that it's like looking at a great painting.)
at 9:32 AM

California Lawyer Gets Beat Up By DA's Investigator

(Source) — The 10th floor of a Santa Ana courthouse was the site of a bloody brawl Wednesday between a defense attorney and an investigator from the Orange County district attorney’s office, authorities said. The fight erupted about 10:30 a.m. in the courthouse hallway between defense attorney James Crawford and the unidentified investigator, according to Orange County Sheriff’s Lt. Mark Stichter. Crawford, who recently won a high-profile court victory against the district attorney’s office in the ongoing jailhouse snitch scandal, was left bleeding, battered and bruised. It’s unclear what, if any, injuries the investigator had. Jerry Steering, a lawyer representing Crawford, said his client was in the courthouse to represent a woman who was subpoenaed to testify. The D.A.’s investigator was assigned to watch over the woman, he said. When Crawford approached his client, the investigator disparaged defense attorneys as “sleazy,” Steering said. Crawford replied that defense attorneys were no worse than the Orange County district attorney’s office, which has been mired in an ever-widening scandal over the use of testimony from inmate informants. As Crawford walked away, the investigator flicked a large paper clip at the lawyer, Steering said. Crawford then tossed the clip back toward the investigator. “The investigator then grabs [Crawford’s] head and slams it into the bench and then punches him like 10 times in the face and head,” Steering said, adding that sheriff’s deputies and officers from the Santa Ana Police Department had to remove the investigator.

If they don't set up a rematch in the octagon and make it pay-per-view, they are missing a golden opportunity.

Note to investigators in the Wise County Courthouse: Don't even think about it! I have ninja moves!
at 8:59 AM

Random Friday Morning Thoughts



  • I'm going to need signatures on a petition to get me on the ballot for District Attorney in the fall. I'll be posting a link later today on how it works. #MakeTheDistrictGreatAgain #INeedATruckCap #Fabulous #Luxurious #I'llBuildAWallOnMontagueBorder #TheyWillPayForIt
  • "Rainy Days and Mondays [Through Saturdays] Always Get Me Down"
  • Dr. Ben Carson is going to endorse Donald Trump? You still want him as your brain surgeon?
  • I went up to the courthouse yesterday to retrieve my umbrella and ended up in a 30 minute discussion on socialism.  I got drawn out of my three point stance. I'm neither for or against it but I love talking about it. I told one of the courthouse workers that I bust my butt working but I suspect she busts her butt more, yet I got to go to Hawaii last year and she could not. How is that fair? It was the Socratic Method of fueling the discussion and it was fantastic.
  • Monroe, Louisiana has receive 20.97" of rain. Somebody needs to check on those Duck Dynasty boys. 
  • Star-Telegram headline: "Controversial African Elephants Land At Alliance Airport". Controversial? They part of the Black Panther Party or something?
  • Crazy discussion yesterday with someone: If you were under indictment and facing prison and you wanted to flee, could you get away with it? The first thing on the other person's list of things to do: Plastic surgery. 
  • Email I received yesterday: "Ok here is a tip that sounds gay, but is not gay.  If you are interested in kayak fishing, search kayak fishing on Pinterest.  They have a ton of cool stuff and modifications that folks have made to trick up their kayaks."
  • I'm totally concur with BagOfNothing's comment about Anna Kendrick. She jazzes me to no end.
  • Note to local and national news sites: If you have a link to a story that has a story but also has a video that automatically plays, I'm out. 
  • I had someone pass me and almost hit me in a school parking lot for the opportunity to sit and wait one car spot in front of me for two minutes until the doors opened. I so wanted to go off of him/her for being a moron. And that's why I don't need a CHL.



at 8:37 AM

3.10.2016

Trump and Ali G



I've always been a sucker for Ali G. Borat is a very close second but Ali G has always been my favorite.
at 10:29 AM

Warning: Do Not Protest At A Trump Convention



You'll get sucker punched by a supporter and then a mountain of cops will move in on you.
at 10:11 AM

Pretty Accurate


at 8:54 AM

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts


  • I've been looking for ladies with an attitude. Seen any?
  • I'm always confused. Should I turn around so I won't do what?
  • Lake Bridgeport is two feet over its designated limit. 
  • I have been telling you for years that the Dallas Mavericks are headed to disaster because (1) Dirk is getting old and (2) Cuban doesn't draft anyone and can't land a free agent. Now it is happening. And what you are seeing now is what you will see for 10 years. #SportsGenuis
  • Nancy Reagan will have an "invitation only" funeral. That concept seems weird. Why not hold it in arena where everyone who loves her can come and show their respect? And I'm almost sure she would be horrified by "an invitation only" funeral.
  • I'm seeing more and more trucks with the massive front grills on the front. What's the point of that? Do you plan to run into stuff or does it serve some other purpose?
  • I have to get you guys a picture of the 22 Pound Family Cat which will depict how big that thing is. And the crazy thing is that it is as quick as a leopard. 
  • The Big 12 Tournament fires up for real today (TCU beat WVU  Tech yesterday) and #22 Baylor plays #23 Evil Empire this morning. The New York Times today has a story entitled, "Big 12 Emerges As The Mightiest Of Them All". 
  • BagOfNothing called me out for calling 538.com "always deadly accurate". OK, that might have been a little over the top on my part. But they did predict 50 of 50 states in the last presidential election. And they say at this point it would be impossible for Trump to win if he is the Republican nominee. Yet I'll bet the house on their prediction Trump wins Illinois and Florida in the upcoming days. Once again, it's over. 
  • There is some weight loss contest going on at the courthouse. There are 10 involved but so far they have been sworn to secrecy who is involved. (I don't know why -- I find it inspirational). I will crack this code. I know it also involves men. So far I've pegged one sweet lady on the third floor and one other sweet girl. I'm like Tom Hanks in The Da Vinci Code.


s
at 8:40 AM

3.09.2016

Oh, My!


Denver Bronco quarterback Peyton Manning retires so they then will rely on the backup. That didn't work out as planned.

I'm still trying to figure out the guaranteed money. I bet it is huge.
at 2:44 PM
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