Austin Traffic

@WORLDSTAR haha traffic in Austin got people mad this morning pic.twitter.com/SvGlzSReQ9

— NoelDeric (@NoelDeric) January 25, 2016

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts

• If you watch Fox News and you'll see them attack Trump. I've been preaching for the last three months that the Republican Party is going to implode because of Trump and I might be right.
• I can still see Trump running as an Independent, and yesterday Bloomberg hinted he might do it. Game. Changer.
• An arrogant Dallas lawyer was sanctioned $133,000 in Lubbock.
• Is it just me. or there a lot of hawks in the air. (Maybe the craziest thing I've ever written.)
• This is abbreviated because I feel sick again. I've been told that that there is a virus going around in Wise County that simply won't go away. Is that true? Mine is a weird pain.

I'm Guessing No Will Have An Opinion About This

Harris County grand jury indicts those behind Planned Parenthood undercover video operation https://t.co/7EzPGjPnJt

— Jennifer Emily (@byjenemily) January 26, 2016

Get Me This Dog Who Ran A Half Marathon On His Own For Fun!

Story

Get Me This Horned Toad Which Lives In Burleson!

I'm a grandma! Meet @thereaganjames' son Flynn. pic.twitter.com/dVCK6aLsHS

— Susan Cloud (@ProducerSusan) January 25, 2016

And check out those high tone fingernails!

Random Monday Morning Thoughts

Sports:That Denver/New England game was great there at the end. but I couldn't get over DeMarcus Ware not being blocked (ever) and Wade Phillips being on the sideline.

I almost watched all of Narcos on Netflix. Two  points: (1) TV is changing, and (2) Pablo Escobar is one fascinating character.

That show made me research Augusto Pinochet.

Mrs. LL: "I'm going to Sam's. Do you want anything?" Me: "I don't even know what is in a Sam's". Her:" It's like a Walmart with bulk items." Me (sarcastically) : "Get me a barrel of beans." The fact that she didn't bring home a barrel of beans out of spite is amazing.

I posted about a JFK auction and then in the mail I received an amazing catalog of sports auction memorabilia that ends at the same time on January 30th. Coincidence?

Bridgeport's Colin Jones is going to the Super Bowl. 

I finished Making a Murder and my head did explode: Especially in the last episode (spoiler alert): "In 2010, [the prosecutor] resigned from his position as Calumet County district attorney following a scandal involving sexually-charged text messages he sent to to a domestic abuse victim. Kratz was the prosecutor in the case against the victim’s ex-boyfriend." And told Mrs. LL after the last episode that my dream of retiring to the jungle may now go on hold because now I want to stay and fight. 

BagOfNothing emailed with this New Yorker article about Texas criminal justice corruption that was published last week. 

Why do you get sucked in when Donald Trump speaks? The Dallas Morning News explains and it is spot on. 

The Family Pups love to go to sleep with their heads on my laptop keyboard causing a cascade of crazy images to appear on the screen.

Rick Perry has endorsed Ted Cruz. That's a game changer!!!!!!!!! (Sarcasm.)

Sports (again): In the early game yesterday, a punt returner tried to field the punt on the run and fumbled it. It might have been 20 years ago, but there is an NFL film of Bill Parcells in practice yelling at a punt returner that you "must set your feet" before you catch it." I don't like the guy, but he is dead right.

Above The Fold

Decatur ISD Policy Regarding Cell Phones

If a phone is confiscated you have to pay $15 to get it back? Are you kidding me? Why not kick it up to $150? Heck, let's go with $1,500.

I have it on good authority that a hypothetical courthouse employee got hypothetically pissed off with this policy and paid the $15 with a hypothetical 1,500 in pennies. She hypothetically is my new hero. #YouGoGirl #FightTheMan

Edit: Proof, hypothetically of course, as she began her campaign to collect the necessary pennies . . .

 Edit: I want to know the name of the person who wrote that policy. Someone tell me who it is. 

Get Me This Acrobatic Dog!

pic.twitter.com/2mTeNmJr37

— Jayson Werth's Beard (@JWerthsBeard) January 23, 2016

And get me these city deer:

Deer frolicking in the street in Cleveland Park. @capitalweather #Snowzilla pic.twitter.com/UaQ5ZLCj4h

— Laurie Trayers (@ltrayers) January 23, 2016

A Faithful Reader Sends Me Breaking News: Plane Down

Just happened at 380 and 156.

Drunk Hot Female Doctor vs. Uber Driver: Who Ya Got?

Language warning

You tube description

Random Friday Morning Thoughts

• I learned yesterday, via email, that one of the deaths noted in the Update was a classmate of mine (actually one year behind me. I didn't recognize her name because they used her married name.) As I wrote in my email reply, it made me sick and made me sad.
• "The FBI took over a child porn site with 23,000 illicit images, left them online for two weeks to track the users." So the FBI is trafficking in child porn? Do they have any idea the number of times those images were copied and distributed and are now out there forever?
• I look forward to the snow photos today from the Northeast.
• I had one of those "I can't find my keys" mornings. That drives me nuts because you know they are there somewhere. I had to use the backup set. 
• Stay with me here. A guy was sentenced to less than two years in federal prison for "scheming" to steal oil from Eagle Ford Shale in Texas. This is a sentence from the press release of the U.S. Attorney's office bragging about the investigation. My comments are in brackets: "The case was investigated by Federal Bureau of Investigation [How many agents and at what cost?], the Internal Revenue Service Criminal Investigation [The IRS? How many agents and at what cost?"], the Texas Attorney General’s Special Investigations Unit [The AG's office has a "special" investigation unit. Once again, how many investigators and at what cost?], the Bexar County District Attorney’s Office [good lord], the Texas Department of Public Safety [How much did DPS spend on this and don't we have enough people involved already?], the Texas Rangers [OK, now this is overkill], the Dimmit County Sheriff’s Office [You kidding me?] and the Texas Railroad Commission [I'm insane now]. Prosecutors are assistant U.S. attorneys Bryan Nathan Reeve and Timothy Adam Duree [Let's end the press release with the names of prosecutors in your office --  who must demand by going by all three names]".  What do I always say? Too many cops. Too many prosecutors. And I'm dead right.
• The Liberally Lean blessing/curse continues. A few years back I named struggling Chris Davis and former Texas Ranger the official Liberally Lean Major League Baseball player. Yesterday: "BALTIMORE -- The Orioles announced the signing of Chris Davis to a club-record seven-year, $161 million contract on Thursday." All guaranteed.

This Kid Is A Born Showman

Above The Fold

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• The Northeast is about to be hit with a massive snowstorm, and I would love to be there. 
• There is a $120 million expansion planned for the Gaylord Texan. Wow. That thing isn't big enough? It will soon have 1,511 rooms. Amazingly, there is one hotel bigger in Texas: The Sheraton in Dallas has 1,840 rooms in downtown according to that link. (Is that by the Reunion Tower? I had no idea it was that large.)
• I'm not surprised by the stock market "correction" -- we all knew it was coming. It might bottom out in the 14,000s and then it would be time to go in -- that is, if any of us had any money to go in.  And the dumbest thing you can do is sell right now. Just ride it out. 
• My hair has become incredibly soft over the last few months, and I haven't changed shampoo. Is that a medical sign of something? (Please forego the "gay or not gay" comments.)
• My car fired up the two times I turned the key yesterday and again this morning without a hitch. However, if I were smart I'd schedule an appointment to get the starter changed. Let's see if I'm smart. (I'm not sure I'd bet on myself.)
• Devon announced layoffs yesterday at some town hall meeting? And oil dipped below $27 a barrel? What a disaster for Texas. This is worse than the early '80s. And it may just beginning. 
• BagOfNothing wrote today that he had never heard of the Bloom County comic strip I posted yesterday.  I bet most people haven't heard of it either. In the 1980s, I couldn't wait for it to come out in the paper. It was the smartest comic strip I had ever seen. And still is. 
• I was listening to The Ticket yesterday evening and they were talking about the Cowboys' Jackie Smith dropping a pass in the end zone against the Steelers in the Super Bowl back in the '70s. (33 second Youtube video here.) For guys my age, you'll never forget it. The anguish on Staubach's face (he knew it was drop but also knew it was a bad pass), and Smith literally flinging his body in frustration while on the ground is one of my all-time painful Cowboy memories. But yesterday things really got ramped up when teammate Charlie Waters randomly called in during that Ticket segment to talk about it and you could still hear the pain in his voice. I don't care if I do have Old Man Syndrome: Things in the NFL were much different back then. The players cared more than the fans.
• Get off my lawn!!!!!
• A new planet may have been discovered. I shall not recognize it until they apologize for the way they have disrespected Pluto. 
• Whatever happened to Focus on the Family? I can't even remember the guy's name who ran it.
• That Decatur/Bridgeport basketball game was apparently over the top. I'll be honest: I'm out of the loop on what's going on, and I probably shouldn't let comments go through about that game. 
• I have never sent a solicitation letter to any one who was arrested in Wise County. And my standard line is that if I ever do, I'll hang my head in shame, and then walk out the back door never to be seen again. 
• My morning was going pretty well until I heard a Jimmy Buffet commercial for his upcoming billionth appearance in the metroplex. Nothing, and I mean nothing, sucks the life force out of me more than Margaritaville.

It's National Penguin Day

I thought about posting something from the documentary March of the Penguins (which I love) but then I remembered Opus from Bloom County. He's the greatest penguin ever.

Twitter Comedy Regarding The Messenger Website Not Working

@WCM_RGreene is a hard working and underpaid (heck, I'm underpaid)  Messenger employee who has to watch high school volleyball and city council meetings. Jrod is just a wise guy. 

Dairy Queen Alert! Dairy Queen Alert!

PIC - Greenville FD Engine 4 has crashed into a Dairy Queen restaurant in Farmersville according to @cc_scanner. pic.twitter.com/jPd7e9F5nE

— DFW Scanner (@DFWscanner) January 20, 2016