Job Opening: America's CIA Director

Story.

Texas Helmets For Saturday

By the way, I hate that style they've had for several years because of that vent at the end of the horn on left. It always makes me think that one horn is deformed and excessively long.

Former Channel 5 Anchor and Viral Video Star Arrrested

The highlight of the story has to be when he allegedly tells his girlfriend, "It's time for you to die like O.J."  I know what the guy meant, but the girlfriend should have replied, "You killed O.J.?"  Either it would have diffused the situation with a discussion about sentence structure. Or it would have ended very badly.

Dirk Singing Or Pretending He Is Indescribable Pain

London Jewel Heist

Story about it.

Random Friday Morning Thoughts

• There have been two arrests in the death of the Tanglewood homeowner who found the teenager dead after a botched robbery.  Recall his body was found in a burnt out car on what would have been the teenager's birthday. Police now believe he was strangled beforehand. 
• We had to dog sit three dogs last night due to an "emergency".  I felt like a Petsmart manager.
• Conservative talk radio is discussing everything from changing its stance on immigration and abortion to "finding a more attractive messenger to convince those people we are right."
• I never thought TCU and Kansas State the Aggies would do as well as they have in their new conferences but they've also done about as well as anyone could have predicted. (Does that make sense?)
• I just don't remember as a kid the temperature being in the 80s as high school football season came to an end.
• The first openly bi-sexual member of Congress is also a "Hey, Now."
• I've watched probably 15 minutes of Pee Wee football/practice over the last two years but some of the coaches are way too hard and physical with those kids.  (I was a TXI Mustang, by the way.)
• Kay Granger will speak in Rhome tomorrow. That's surprising. As in surprising she crosses the Wise County line.
• Darrell Royal retired from coaching at 52.  Mack Brown is 61. (And everyone says that this long article about Royal published this week is really good.)
• High school geometry looks harder than I remember.  And I saw words on a "biology spelling test" last night that I had never heard of. 
• "Mortgage giant Fannie Mae earned $1.8 billion from July through September [and] paid a dividend of $2.9 billion to the U.S. Treasury and sought no additional federal aid." Funny how all that worked out after all.
• Great photo of a model of the re-creation of the assassination of JFK. (If that makes sense.)
• I've seen one James Bond movie and that's because a girlfriend made me go see it in theaters. I don't even remember which one it was.
• The new outfits by the Mavs Dancers are catching attention. 

Someone Is Not Winning Graciously

Someone's wise guy Tumbler page here.

"The Case Of The Missing White Voter"

Drudge linked to this story today. That really is amazing. Projections are that 6.68 million white voters stayed home when compared to 2008.

Edit: Absolutely unrelated to the "white vote" (but interesting nonetheless), in Tarrant County the percentage of voters who cast "straight ticket" votes was 65.36%.  I still haven't heard a Wise County figure.

Diane Sawyer

Some people think she was drunk during election night, but now this video has surfaced of her apparently popping pills and drinking a little red wine before Primetime Live in the 1990s. In other news, she was smokin' hot back then.

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• Headline today: "Texas last fatality-free day on Texas roads was 12 years ago today." You'd think that would happen a heck of a lot more frequently than that. 
• Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh were all smiles and optimism yesterday.  I thought the future of America depended on the election?
• Mrs. LL got up at 5:00 to do swimming/exercise.  Then we almost hit each other as I left for work and she returned.
• The Fourth Grader in the House has yet to acknowledge that there are only two bunnies and not three in the cage.  She absolutely knows, though.
• Fox 4 had a story last night on a dilapidated trailer park in Parker County between Azle and Springtown.  It was awful. No one should have to live in those conditions. 
• The NFL channel had a one hour documentary on Jimmy Johnson last night. It was great. Man, it's fun to see him and Jerry Jones in the beginning.
• Maybe the best explanation of the election: There's just not enough old angry white guys.
• WBAP's Hal Jay keeps saying "We need to get back to an Andy Griffith way of life."  Chris Matthews would interpret that as "code" for something else.
• Heard by me: "It's yoyo for dinner." Me?: "Huh?" Her: "You're on your own."
• Heard a million times on the news yesterday: "Fiscal cliff."
• There's a Danny Thomas and a Burt Lancaster listed in the funerals in the Update today.
• Those Obama girls sure have grown up, haven't they?
• My blood sugar turned out not to be at a diabetes level but still high. I think I'm going to take a class on how to control it. 
• In honor of Darrell Royal, the Longhorns will line up in the wishbone on their first play on Saturday.  But I can't imagine them doing anything other than handing off to the fullback because running the true triple option isn't easy. And passing out of that formation would be very un-Royal like. 
• Sarah Palin was on Fox on election night and had a really drawn in face. 
• Ted Nugent on Obama's re-election: "I cry tears of blood for The Last Best Place & the warriors who died for this tragedy." "Goodluk America u just voted for economic & spiritual suicide. Soulless fools." "What subhuman varmint believes others must pay for their obesity booze cellphones birthcontrol abortions & lives." Sheesh. 

Election Wrap Up: CNN Exit Polls

That's really interesting. Old and White vs. Young and Multi-Colored.

Above The Fold

Now This Is A National Tragedy

Scarlett Johansson's new tattoo.

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts

• Although this will be election intensive, I just saw that former UT coach Darrell Royal has died. 
• Now back to the election: How many times have I said it? It's all about demographics. 
• And if you think the Republicans might have won with a more conservative candidate, you're nuts. Gingrich, Santorum, or Perry would have been destroyed.
• Wise County went 82% for Romney.
• This is amazing: Romney got 56,974,934 total votes last night. Four years ago, John McCain got 59,934,814. That last number would have been enough to beat the President last night. 
• No one was more wrong than pundit Dick Morris who had been all over the place predicting a Romney landslide.  Well, that goofy "Mad Money" guy Jim Cramer might have overtaken him by predicting Romney would win 440-98. 
• Those polls that everyone criticized were exactly right.
• From a Wise County pastor on Facebook last night: "I'm done with America. I feel no allegiance to the USA anymore. We'll see about Texas. This world is not my home, I'm just a'passing thru. My treasures are laid up somewhere beyond the blue. The angels beckon me from heaven's open door and I can't feel at home in this world any more! Maranatha!"
• Trying to explain the Electoral College to a Fourth Grader is amazingly fun. When States were called for Romney or Obama last night, she wanted to know how many "points" it was worth.
• Mark Davis ended his radio show yesterday with an on-the-air prayer about the election. 
• And to remind everyone: I predicted that the Rangers wouldn't win a playoff series and that the President would win re-election.  
• I can't find a number for straight ticket voting in Texas or Wise County last night. Anyone? 
• Colorado and Washington legalized pot last night. It's still illegal federally. That'll be interesting. 
• I was right about hearing something had happened to an Alvord coach. He committed suicide. How many does that make for that little town? 

And Now We Wait

I'll be hanging around here tonight for the Wailing and Gnashing of Teeth.  If I remember four years ago, the race got called at 9:00 p.m. our time once most of the western states officially closed their polls.  But unless Colorado and Nevada are needed, we should be able to figure it out before then.

Edit at 8:15 p.m.: Pennsylvania goes to Obama. It just got tough for Romney.

Edit at 8:30 p.m.:  Obama wins Wisconsin. Leading strongly in New Hampshire.

Edit at 9:34 p.m.: Man, this is getting tight. Ohio, Florida, Virginia, and North Carolina are neck and neck.

Edit at 10:10 p.m.: Obama wins Iowa.  Florida seems like Bush/Gore all over again.

Edit at 10:11 p.m. Obama wins New Mexico. (He is 21 electoral votes away).

Edit at 10:14 p.m.: Fox News projects Ohio for Obama. "Essentially, that's it."

Edit at 10:16 p.m.: NBC News projects President Obama wins re-election.

Edit at 10:18 p.m.: Fox News calls the election for Obama.

The President's first tweet:

Edit at 10:27 p.m.: Karl Rove is on Fox News saying that Ohio should not be declared for Obama.  Fox News embraces this declaration. Even this is genius by Fox News or they are embarrassing themselves.

New Black Panther Panic!

Public Service Announcement: What The Women On The Bottom Of The Ballot Look Like

Cheri Honkala

Giant Turtle Wrestling

That moment right before the fall is more dramatic than any pile-driver ever administered at the old Sportatorium.