Someone Has Kidnapped Pete Delkus

National Weather Service says:

And Pete Delkus completely rules out anything happening.  We normally can have a 10% chance of thunderstorms and Delkus will tell us he's on red alert for the potential of damaging storms.  I'm worried about him.

Watch An Injury Prone Guy Flirt With Injury

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• In March, ESPN had a feature of how much Britney Griner loves to skateboard. I told Mrs. LL then there is no way I'd allow her to do that if I were her coach. Yesterday, we learned Griner has broken her wrist.
• Heard through some of my Tarrant County buddies that District Judge Sharen Wilson rejected a plea bargain in a child sexual abuse case and forced a trial. The Defendant was then found not guilty by a jury. (You won't see that in a press release from the new Tarrant County DA's office PR gal.)
• Prediction: Josh Hamilton will go on the disabled list within the next 45 days.
• Why in the world would anyone care if gays were allowed to marry?
• And to think George W. Bush wanted a constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage. History will not treat him well for that. 
• Still a huge fan of Modern Family.
• Lots of people walk out of criminal courts mumbling under their breath. (Side note: "under their breath" is an odd phrase.)
• The Ticket discussed Stephen Kings 11/22/63 book this morning. What a great concept: You can go back in time as often as you like but every time you do (1) you are transported back to the exact same moment in time and (2) your new trip resets everything you did on your previous trip.
• I'd go back to the time of Jesus and follow him and the disciples around. And I'd try to do something that at least would get a mention in the Bible. That'd be cool.
• For all you gals who follow "Men's Humor" on Twitter, here's a secret: Men don't think that stuff is funny.
• The great Megan Henderson missed the start of her news broadcast in Los Angeles. 
• We had are carpets cleaned yesterday which worked out fantastically with the exception of the parts that weren't cleaned.
• I got beat up by a judge at the Court of Criminal Appeals two weeks ago, and I was stunned to learn they decided the case so quickly yesterday. I won. There was one dissent. Yep, by the judge that kept giving me the business. 

Breaking: President Obama Just Went All In For The Gay

Christina Screenshots From "The View" "The Voice"

How I ever even considered replacing her as an official Liberally Lean gal is beyond me.

Did I Do It Again Or Did I Do It Again?

Link.

I told you that story was too fishy to be true. I saw it a mile away and, you know what?  I do this all the time!  Remember the fire in Saginaw at the antique store that I wasn't believing? Turned out to be arson.  Two or three years ago there was a story of a sexual assault in a park in Keller that I immediately labeled a lie. Cops backed me while I was on vacation so I didn't even get to gloat about it here.   The hair-dresser "murder" in north Dallas area where she was found dead in a burned out car when I said "something ain't right about that"? Medical examiner came out and disagreed with the police. And if that over-protective dad in Plano would let his high school daughter fess up to faking her kidnapping to Oklahoma, I'd have another one one my scoreboard. Sheesh, I've probably forgotten about a dozen more.

If I can find a job listing  for "exceptional oracle needed" on cragislist, I may quit this lawyer and blogging gig.

It's a gift.

Trial Update

I sat through the reading of the "court's charge" (the instructions and law the jury receives from the judge) and, man, was it long. Not only were there a million definitions in it, but there was also the law of self defense, reasonable use of force for disciplining a child, and . . . wait for it . . . The Castle Doctrine.  And that became a big part of the defense for the Aggravated Assault case where an adult male is the alleged victim.

First time a jury has ever even considered the Castle Doctrine in Wise County. (And I doubt that the legislature really thought it would be used, in the words of the defense attorney, in a case "involving a couple of drunks," and where the old saying, "some people just got it coming to them" might apply.)

Edit: Guy was found guilty on all three charges (three victims).

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts

• Normally judges have pretty strict rules regarding campaigning. I'm half asleep as I write this (as always), but I just saw a commercial for Texas Supreme Court judge Don Willett which had such things as he "defended our right to display the Ten Commandments" and he is "the judicial remedy to Obamacare." That just seems wrong for a judicial ad.
• And the ad ended with a child in his lap as he read the Bible. It started with an endorsement from James Dobson.
• I had my very vivid I'm-In-School-But-Can't-Find-My-Class dream last night.
• I also dream about falling but I'm never hurt. Normally I'll bounce off things like tree limbs that launch me into another fall.
• Most people who are arrested in Wise County are locked up for very minor offenses and will be released once they make bond. That bond amount will be set by a Justice of the Peace who, in the past, would arrive at the jail between 9:00 and 11:00 a.m. in the morning. I'm getting a ton of complaints that it is becoming quite normal for the JP to now show up at 3:00 in the afternoon or later. That is unacceptable and certainly not the "efficient" and "responsive" Republican way.
• I've not heard a single negative complaint about The Avengers. In fact, I talked to two different people yesterday who said the audience applauded at the end of the movie.
• Josh Hamilton hit four home runs last night. His brain might be fried, but he can swing a bat. (But I think there were more fans at the softball game I went to last night than in Baltimore.)
• Marcia Clark was on Fox and Friends this morning to "talk about her new book." They hurtin' for guests over there?
• It's getting harder and harder to find: Blood Rush -- the book about Wise County's most notorious killer. 
• I'll take a person who doesn't get worked up over anything versus a person who gets worked up over everything.
• The Ticket had a segment on The Beastie Boys yesterday and, I'll admit, other than Brass Monkey and You Gotta Fight, I really wasn't familiar with their music. And considering I thought those two songs were bad bits, I wasn't expecting much. Verdict: Their other stuff wasn't bad at all.  
• This is not like one of my old single guy weeks: Softball tournament, birthday parties, Mother's Day. A man doesn't even have time to play with a backstop. 
• Couple attacked by a baseball that acted like the bullet that hit Kennedy.
• The Tarrant County DA's new media relations employee has never released a press release about a "not guilty" verdict (and I know for a fact one occurred last week in a child sexual abuse case.) 
• What's up with juvenile crime? We had the verdict last week in the kid that dropped all the F bombs, a bunch of kids last year pushed the kid in front of the DART train, we've got a home invasion and murder in Dallas by kids, and four teens are held in a fatal carjacking in Houston. 
• The Black Hawk Down book is pretty good but I feel like a need a city map of Mogadishu in order to keep up. 

Messenger Above The Fold

Criminal Trial Going On

One of the deputies that responded

Table: Jay Lapham, Greg Lowery, Unknown, Bill Ray, Donny Ray Scott

I can't tell much about it, but it looks like one guy is accused of going ballistic on his family near Chico. They played the 911 call of the father-in-law* who had been injured and was driving himself to the hospital. They also showed some photos of a kid who had some pretty bad bruising.

I'll find out more.
___________
*For you Ticket fans, that guy sounded exactly like the Fake Billy Tubbs (complete with a bunch of "yeah"s)

Random email

'Just heard the police have some people stopped on Hwy 287 southbound lane between Decatur and Alvord and LOTS of police cars and rifles drawn. ??????????????????'

Barry (from iPhone)

I Mentioned That Name In January For Some Reason

Bud Kennedy posted this picture today and made a joke about how much smaller can the tiny Westover Hills government be? The "city" is buried in west Fort Worth. It's kind of like Highland Park is to Dallas.

But what got my attention was the fourth name on the list. I would suspect he was one of the victims in one of the most famous crimes in Fort Worth history. Let me Google that for you.

Colorado State Kid Tries To Dive Off An Apartment Complex. Fails.

Obviously that kid is the victim. The main culprit has to be  ABC's Wild World Of Sports which used to be the only sports show on during a Saturday afternoon. My generation was whipped to death with Acapulco Cliff Diving and the absolutely insane High Diving. No one ever got hurt, and there seemed to be a 100% chance of success. Alas, this guy is too young to have seen that so for now we'll simply call him "idiot."

I love the gal at the 1:26 mark: "I don't even feel bad for the kid." Cold blooded, but so attractive.

Original youtube clip here.

P.S. I can't tell you how much I cringed the first time I watched that video. But I figured youtube wouldn't have a clip showing the kid doing a face plant into the concrete. Maybe five years from now, but not in 2012.

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts

• How long have they had commercials completely in Spanish on Fox Sports Southwest? (I got a "I told you this already!" from Mrs. LL last night.)
• My new consecutive pitch and catch to the backstop streak reached 58 last night. The imaginary crowd in my mind was really into it. 
• I had a minor oil spill in my driveway on Saturday when I was changing the oil on my lawnmower. As I scrambled like I was trying to contain the BP disaster in the Gulf of Mexico, I remembered I heard a trick about kitty litter. Thank goodness (finally) for the Family Cat, kitty litter worked like a miracle!
• A carjacking at a private school in Arlington yesterday left one woman seriously injured. (With tuition like this, they might want to consider some private security.)
• The judge in the Deion Sanders case found yesterday that neither he or his wife committed family violence. What he should have said is, "The court denies the petition for protective order of both parties. The court further finds that both parties and the lawyers should be ashamed of themselves."
• I think anyone who is a "storm chaser" is also a drama queen.
• I'd withhold judgment on the Jane McGarry DWI case. Getting pulled over for "failure to signal a lane change" is a good start to defense case and, trust me, "failing" the walk and turn test and the one leg stand test means absolutely nothing. (That DPS scoring system is beyond ridiculous.) Let me see the tape, and I'll tell you whether she'll be convicted or not. 
• By the way, McGarry was taken off the air yesterday by KXAS. I could see them using the DWI as an excuse to exercise some cost-cutting. 
• I wonder if this will cause an rumors today in the country music world: The first name listed on the Tarrant County Medical Examiner' web site says Randy Rogers died last night. (Not that Randy Rogers.)
• Good point on the Mavs this morning heard on The Ticket: This has not been the Mark Cuban era over the last 10 years, this has been the Dirk ere. And Dirk was here before Cuban. 
• I got persuaded into buying Ranger tickets a couple of months ago for Sunday because it was "Girl Scouts Night"  (Yep, Kid In The House instigated.)  I figured it would be some spare game if they were running that promotion. But I'll be dang. It's the Angels. Anyone know the projected starters? Yu? C.J. Wilson? 
• Courtney Stodden is at it again.
• A Texas DA has been charged with bribery and other seedy crimes.

And Another

Florida is always competing.

And we have a special bonus of a Texas constable accused of sexual harassment.

Want To See A Gallery of the 2012 Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader Auditions?

Thought so.

Wise County Murder Conviction Affirmed

It's not very exciting (unless you think confession law is exciting), but the Fort Worth Court of Appeals affirmed a conviction out of Wise County in its last set of rulings.

There Might Be A Train Coming

Since there were no injuries, I think it's safe to say that was awesome.  You couldn't design a train splitting a trailer in half like that. Straight out of the movies.

And I was cutting Mrs. Screaming Lady a break up until the point of impact. Once it was clear no one was hurt, it was time to put a sock in it.