Dear Family Cat: I Take It All Back

(Thanks @myownworld2100)

Edit: Lots of comments I couldn't post (but shout out to the guy who submitted a couple of lines from  a particular song about "control" and signed it "Double Fake Prince." Genius. )

The Most Mesmerizing Video Ever

Some people like fireplaces. Others an aquarium . Some prefer bird feeders. To each his own when it comes to relaxing.

But for me, it's this video. I'm just going to loop it for the rest of the day.

We May Have A "Bum Steer Award"

Heard this morning that a guy walked into our DA's office and wanted to know if his son was on the docket because he was going to kill him. As in really kill him.

I think the cops are looking for him now. The daddy. Not the son. (Who wasn't on the docket at all.)

Random Monday Morning Thoughts

• Bad Deputy: "WEATHERFORD -- A former Parker County sheriff's deputy accused of stealing from a memorial fund set up for the family of a fellow deputy has been indicted on felony theft charges." Good grief, man.
• Sometimes I think the Tarrant County Medical Examiner's Office is nuts: They've ruled as a homicide a guy who had a seizure and fell off of a stool in his home. Homicide? Well, he did receive a gunshot wound 26 years ago so the two are obviously related, says the ME.
• Someone noted a two year old sign on a vending machine at the Decatur ISD multi-purpose building. They made the reference that it showed "passive aggressiveness." 
• Ticket Fans: Did you catch 1920s Reporter Guy asking Laker's coach Phil Jackson a final question at his press conference yesterday?
• Driving through Grapevine on 114 causes me white knuckles. I hate it when there the shoulder is taken away by a concrete barriers.
• I started off Mother's Day in pretty good standing but got a "You do realize it's Mother's Day all day long?" when I issued a Piddling Alert later on in the morning.
• Really don't know about the cheerleading issue over at Bridgeport High but it's gone public based upon a Special Agenda that's been posted. (pdf)  Edit: Keep away from personal attacks, please. We all know Texas cheerleading is a hot button. 
• WBAP's Steve Lamb on the Rangers game yesterday, "You don't see a Grand Slam very often." Yeah, if you consider at least 120 or more a year in MLB "not very often."
• The best documentary ever on the background of 9/11 is National Geographic's "Inside 9/11".  I watched a part of again this weekend and my ears perked when I heard the main culprit in the first Trade Center attack, Ramzi Yousef, was captured in Islamabad, Pakistan in a house owned by Bin Laden in 1995. No wonder we were looking for Bin Laden in that area.
• If Bin Laden hadn't been found in the raid last week, I guess we would have never heard about it. And if Pakistan did make news of the raid public, I suppose we would deny it. Which begs the question: I wonder how many raids we had conducted where Bin Laden was not found?  
• Heard on the radio: Was there really much of a difference between Bin Laden's home and a prison? 
• Awkward moment on Fox 4 News this morning when they flashed a picture up of two of the crew members at Mayfast with a random person between them. Anchor Lauren Przybyl quipped, "That poor man in the middle!" It was awkward because that was not a guy.
• More proof we're doomed: Philadelphia police release video in an effort to find those involved in parking lot assault. Man, there's one guy who is a complete goon. 
• Found myself cutting out those hair tie thingys out of the Second Grader In The House's hair after she went swimming. Her ponytails were in "knots", she said, and it seemed like necessary emergency action.

When I'm Wrong, I'm Wrong

Ok, I've predicted (almost guaranteed) for months that the Mavs would be long gone by either the first or second playoff series. I was wrong. Dead wrong. They sweep the Lakers by winning four games in a row which only makes sense if you consider an unthinkable tsunami in Japan, a an unthinkable tornado in Alabama,  Osama being captured, and Obama being elected. (Audience pandering on that last one.)

That 2012 guy might be right.

(But, man, Dallas could have launched a shot while being water-boarded and it would have gone in today.)

Edit. Funny: didthelakersgetswept.com/

Breaking: Small Plane Crash Near Chico

That's the report I'm getting.

Any info, folks?

Edit: My loyal readers come through! (Thanks, Brian!) Looks like no serious injuries. Channel 8 was the first one to post something.

Random Front Page Of The Day: The Spoils of War

Cop Treats 15 Year Old Like He's LB Ray Lewis

Story. (Gal was rolling on the ground fighting with momma before cops arrive.)

Original video. (Girl needs to back away from the cheeseburgers.)

We've Got Another Emergency We Didn't Know About

Story.

And that sound you heard was Brian Loncar and Jim Adler blowing up.

Edit: Here's the Plaintiffs' Lawyers response (which probably is only entertaining to Plaintiffs' lawyers.):



Edit: I don't know much about politics, but Tort Reform II passed the House late Saturday in what sounded like a free for all.

Meet The Radical Right's New Sweetheart: Ann Barnhardt

This young lady is getting Internet Famous for posting two videos which, admittedly, I haven't watched. The first one was some rant about defending the First Amendment which I don't have any problem with. But the second one involves burning the Koran which she bookmarked with strips of bacon.  The description of the second video pretty much convinced me that I don't care about anything she has to say in the first.

All info and videos here.

Conspiracy Update: First Spotting Of Osama

(Hey, any faithful reader that's going to photoshop the Decatur Begger and Osama is going to get it posted.)

Random Friday Morning Thoughts

• The Mississippi River is rising and some are predicting the state of Mississippi is about to see the greatest flood in its history. Talk about a story that's been buried because of other news.
• It was National Day of Prayer yesterday. I actually saw a group of about six people observing it on the courthouse lawn but that's about it.
• I'll find out more on this: A 17 year old Jack County kid was charged with "offensive touching" (a Class C misdemeanor -- the equivalent of a traffic ticket) of a 15 year old on a school bus. Now the County Attorney and a prominent* Jacksboro lawyer are battling in a JP court.
• The price of oil dropped 10% yesterday. I'm sure that's just the natural result *cough* of supply and demand. 
• The texture of food has never factored in to what I will or will not eat. 
• The sound of a drawer off of its grooves and grinding against the frame as it is pulled out drives me insane.
• I wonder if those Japanese nuclear reactors are still leaking.
• It's hard to get any news on the Granbury double murder trial going on, but it doesn't seem like a particularly strong case. (Latest update which has a reference to First Financial Bank.)
• Economy news this morning: The unemployment rate ticked back up to 9%. (Someone will tell me that will be a bigger factor for Obama's re-election chances than Bin Laden, and I'll probably have to concede that point.)
• I should have recorded it, but Steve Eager read a Viewer's Voice email on Fox 4 News last night, seemed confused, read it again, and then proclaimed, "I don't understand that." I didn't either. 
• The last time the Lakers played the Mavs in the playoffs was in 1988. I got to go to Game Four for free when my secretary, on the day of the game, walked into my office and asked me if I wanted tickets. (And I thought things like that would happen all the time for the rest of my life. Nope.)
• If the Navy doesn't use the Bin Laden capture as a recruiting tool, they are idiots at marketing.
• The SEALs used dogs in the raid? Wow.  And they had titanium teeth at a cost of $2,000 a piece? Well, that report yesterday was not true.
• That 9/11 Ceremony was a little weak yesterday.

_________
*Friend of mine who I thought about throwing under the bus.

I Get Lots Of Accidental Email

Since I'm the Donald Trump of www.wisecounty.com (meaning I own it), I get lots of email. Specifically, if anyone sends any email with wisecounty.com as the extension, I get it. It can be a treasure trove.

Just got this one a second ago with the message, "I've got another one to add to our slideshow!"

Girl, I'll give you $1,000 to trade cats.

Fox 4's Becky Oliver Was Busting Heads Again Last Night

This time she wasted spent countless hours watching Lockheed Martin employees drink beer across the street during their lunch hours.  I was more offended by their littering. Story.

It's "sweeps month" isn't it?

Poor Stopwatch

Sure, the guy falling and killing himself is why this video got posted on the Internet, but it's the reaction of the trainer which is my high point.

There might be a five ruptured discs in the back of the other guy, but he tosses that stopwatch aside because his fancy pull up bar contraption has been destroyed.

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• When I was young, I once asked my buddies when Cinco de Mayo was going to be that year. Sadly, I wasn't that young. 
• If we really did seize the computer stuff from Bin Laden's compound (10 hard drives, 5 computers, and over 100 external storage drives), I'd love to be the guy who gets to go through them. (Assuming I knew Arabic and was an encryption expert.)
• Watch it just be episodes of Southpark and the Jack Ass movie series.
• The Messenger reports a second Tea Party has formed in Wise County. This one is in Bridgeport and formed by a Hispanic who wants to dispel the notion that the party is full of racists.  Directly under the quote is an unrelated picture of a guy in a sombrero. 
• Speaking of movies, the three top grossing films so far this year are named Rango, Hop, and Rio. I'm guessing they are kids' movies, but I honestly have no idea. 
• Mavs up 2-0 over the Lakers? My prediction is in trouble, but they were up 2-0 over the Heat in the Championship Game a few years back. Still not a believer.
• If you turned on the TV at 3:44 a.m. this morning, you would have seen the end of a Major League Baseball game. Edit: Oops. Make that 1:44 a.m.
• UNT is trying to revamp its image and has hired a consulting firm to help. That's an easy fix: Bring back the 1970s neon green flying worm emblem. 
• Mrs. LL returned the confiscated soccer balls to the Neighbor Boys yesterday.  I bet they thought it was like the Grinch returning to Hooville with the presents.
• Three U.S. Senators public ally announced they had seen the dead Bin Laden photo when they had actually seen a fake Internet one. Makes you feel confident in their judgment, doesn't it? 
• Pippa Middleton really giving it the What For on the dance floor.
• Star-Telegram fluff piece on Trophy Club today quotes a resident as saying, "Here I can get anywhere I want to go in 15 to 20 minutes." I guess that's true if he only wants to go to Grapevine. 
• Rick Perry is still whining about the feds denying disaster relief for the Texas wildfires. It might have something to do with the fact Perry included 252 counties in the request (yep, even Wise is in there.)
• Of all the books that will be written about the invasion of the Bin Laden compound, I hope Jon Krakauer writes one. 

Kim Kardashian At The Beach

I'm issuing a Tsunami warning.

Breaking: No Picture To Be Released

If you thought the Kennedy Assassination Conspiracy was big, you have just seen the beginning of a new one that will dwarf it by comparison.   And this one has a built in audience: There are those who hate Obama so much that they want to be convinced this is just some manufactured political stunt. It will spread like wildfire.

Huge Edit: Reuters has obtained some photos taken by a Pakistani security official who entered the home after the Americans have left. Some have been released. (Graphic.) Or here.