DPS Wants You To Know They Are All Over IT

I love the first sentence of the press release: "A sex offender wanted on 18 counts of aggravated sexual assault of a child is behind bars after his arrest last night at an international bridge in El Paso."  Wow. At an international bridge? Did they tackle him as he raced toward the border? Taze him as he tried to sneak back in? Was it a secret operation? Tell us! Tell us!

Nope. Read a little further and you'll find that Mexican officials arrested him and turned him over to DPS at the border. [Insert sound of Sad Trombone.]  Although DPS takes credit for learning of his location within Mexico.

I Would Dog Perry For Pandering But I Had A Different Thought

More.

And I've always wondered why we think the more people that pray, the more likely there will be results. That seems a little shallow and, in fact, demeaning to God. Are we trying to get His attention with numbers? I always thought that "go into your closet and pray alone" meant something.

Clemson Fantasy Camp

Hey, I didn't watch all of this nor do I expect you to. I think it's a bunch of middle aged guys going to a fantasy camp where they pretend they are Clemson football players. Hey, if Baylor held one and promised me I would be awarded the Fantasy Heisman Trophy at the end of it, there's no way I'd take part in that silliness.

But I do want you to watch one part: Go to the 1:35 mark where the old men recreate running down the famed Clemson hill in the end zone onto the field. That guy looks like John Candy in Stripes when he's running out of control through the trail in the woods.

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• Edit: Oops. Sorry for delay. Forgot to hit "publish". 
• The hype for next week's Royal Wedding really hasn't been as bad as I thought it would be. 
• Helped try to hang curtains in a very small window last night. When the place is so cramped that you can't use a drill, it makes a simple job a beating. And the need to use a hack saw is always a bad sign. 
• Speaking of: In cleaning out the garage last weekend, I learned I had three hack saws, two sets of bolt cutters, and five tape measures.
• NBC 5's Jane McGarry big timed us last night on Twitter.
• If you've seen the Exorcist, you'll probably giggle/be disturbed by this.
• There's a viral video going around about a reporter with an awful runny nose. I'm not watching that. 
• I heard that "the Flip" had been discontinued this week and thought they were talking about a flip phone. Nope. It was the Flip video camera that was purchased by Cisco less than two years ago for more than a half billion dollars. They even ran a Super Bowl Ad a couple of months ago. Odd. 
• The Family Cat is at the cat hospital getting "fixed" right now. (Yep, we were a little slow in getting that done.)  Maybe that will give her an attitude adjustment in general as well as eliminate a severe personality change that occurred every three weeks that really creeped me out. 
• The murdered Frisco fitness instructor case gets more tragic as we learn she had an eight year old autistic son and an ex-boyfriend is a "person of interest.
• And I'll continue to point out that "person of interest" is a made up term in the last 15 years or so that has no legal meaning. It's simply a way for the media and law enforcement to refer to a suspect as something other than a suspect in order to avoid defamation issues. 
• Probably the best collection of Texas wildfire photos here. 
• Texas Rep. Kirk Watson was on the radio this morning promoting his bill that provides limited immunity for alcohol related crimes for minors if a person calls 911 to report possible alcohol poisoning of someone else. So a kid's buddy is dying and he's so morally bankrupt that he won't call in because he fears a $500 fine for Minor In Possession? And Watson thinks a law would change that? And how often does this happen anyway?
• Fox News this morning teased a story on the Houston child who dropped a gun at school with a graphic that read "Kindergarten Justice?". It then teased a story on President Obama's use of Facebook with the question "Does that give him a dangerous advantage?"  Dangerous?
• I think the new White House Press Secretary is the worst one in years. 
• I was finally disappointed with an episode of Modern Family last week. 

Just When You Think Wise County Is A Bit Sheltered

 And closer . . .

I'll admit that I saw this yesterday on the way to the courthouse and didn't have a clue what it meant. Only today, when by chance I was reading a movie review in Time, did I find out.

If you know,  I give you big props. For the rest of you, you'll only be interested if you like the Tea Party or are familiar with Ayn Rand's Atlas Shrugged (which has been released as an independent movie).  Safe to say we've got someone in the former category behind that door.

Sports Talk Interest Only

Deadspin (if I have to explain, stop reading) is after The Fan's Richie Whitt (ditto) for dogging Rangers pitcher Colby Lewis for missing his start in New York to see the birth of his second child. Lewis finally took the mound last night and got lite up.  Now Deadspin is trying to do the same to Whitt.

I wouldn't want Deadspin picking on me, but Whitt can't buy that much publicity. (Whitt's blog at the Dallas Observer is here and - trust me - no one has more haters in the comments that he does. Even I can't rival it.)

Edit: Richie's reply to the masses.

This Does Not Look Good

Last night there was a report of a missing Frisco fitness instructor.

This morning they found her car.

Now they've found a body.

Wow: Forgot There Were Other Texas Fires Going On

Heck of a photo. (On Facebook.)

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts

• Opened my sock drawer yesterday and looked down to see the Family Cat. She looked at me like I was intruding. 
• The Cowboys released their 2011 schedule yesterday with the big storyline being they would play in New York on the tenth anniversary of 9/11 in a nationally televised evening game on NBC.  Unfortunately, I bet that game never happens due to the current lockout.
• Note to local sports talk shows: Going through the new schedule and saying "I predict win" after every game is a tired bit. (Greg Williams did it on The Fan at around 6:05 p.m. and then Mike Rhyner did it on The Ticket about ten minutes later. I'm sure Randy Galloway did it on ESPN Radio but there's no way I'm listening.)
• Edit: Deleted reference to fire investigation and fund raiser. Different fires.
• It will make you nervous, but mint.com is an amazing budget/finance site. It actually sucks in data from your credit card and bank accounts in order to track and categorize every purchase. Throw in a couple of automatically created pie charts and suggested budgeting, and it's pretty cool. 
• I still wonder how all the hotels in Decatur stay in business.
• The history of 420. (That sentence either caused immediate acknowledgement or a question mark to form over your head.)
• While the Messenger first ignored the proposed creation of the new legislative Texas house district 88, it has now gone crazy with nicknames for it: First it was the "Great 88" (dumb) to "Crazy 88" (A Kill Bill reference?) to now "The Dairy Queen District" (an obvious Liberally Lean trademark infringement.)
• There was a 50 car pile up in Arlington yesterday blamed on the sun reflecting off the wet pavement. I'm surprised you don't see more of that.
• Mavericks are up 2-0.  I'm still not convinced they win this series and, as I predicted before the season, they definitely won't get out of Round Two. 
• Lots of bottled water and supply drives being held to benefit the firefighters to our west. I bet they'll be overstocked if they aren't already. (Palo Pinto isn't Haiti.)
• Bridget Marquardt is still a Hey, Now.
• "Denton Mayor Mark Burroughs’ law firm will collect the city’s delinquent property taxes for at least another year." That seems wrong. .
• After three years of use, I think the iPhone is a technological marvel. (And the Droid has already become what Windows was to the Apple operating system.)
• Edit: University of Texas female rugby player dies after injuries sustained in game (although it wasn't a UT game.)

Palo Pinto Evacuated

Which might have been a little premature, but I can understand why everyone's on edge. But I noticed on the news that Wise County had a police presence in the town.

Wise County Sheriff's Office Car With Loud Speaker Telling People to Evacuate

This Guy Reminds Me Of Some Actor And It's Driving Me Nuts. Ed Norton?

Come On, Pete. Give Us Something!!!

Thunderstorms? Softball size hail? Tsunami? You know there has to be something that Wise County is in imminent danger of!!!

If that man doesn't go into panic mode in the next two hours, I'm going to lose all faith in guys who know how to read reports from the National Weather Service and act like it's their own personal work.

Edit: Sooooooo close, yet so far @ 3:40 pm:

Just An Average Tuesday Morning For A Six Year Old. Wait. What?

Link.

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts

• I watched The Bridge a while back - a documentary about suicides of people who jump off of the Golden Gate Bridge. With a survival rate of only 2%, a 16 year old girl is lucky after she jumped on Sunday.
• I really don't see how high humidity plays a significant role in deterring wildfires.
• There's a Burn Ban today in Wise County: Let me suggest that anyone dumb enough to create a fire outside today is too dumb to be aware of a Burn Ban.
• I'm not certain it starts today, but a trial of a Wise County inmate who has made verbal outbursts at docket calls for the last few months is about to be tried. For months he wanted to represent himself but had a change of heart at the last minute. 
• Upper 90s today? (Nope, it's no proof of global warming, but I wonder where the skeptics are that always post when it's an unseasonably cold day.)
• Update on the Texas deputy killed yesterday: The victim was a part-time female deputy and the alleged shooter was a 21 year old inmate with mental issues. He was caught about an hour later. 
• I dread my water bill and electricity bill if the weather doesn't change.(And did we really have to be recreating Antarctica when I walked in the door last night?)
• President Obama kind of jumped on a local Channel 8 reporter yesterday. (It made USA Today, but doesn't seem to be that big of a deal.)
• I've given her a chance, but I think Fox 4's Lauren Przybyl is to Good Day what Angela is to The Office. (Both went to Baylor, by the way.)
• The headline all over the place yesterday was "45% of Americans Pay No Taxes." For a while, I thought that meant that 45% of Americans owed no additional taxes above their withholdings on tax day. But, nope, the story means no taxes.
• Baylor cheerleaders in the pool. Hey, now. 
• The stripper who falsely accused three Duke lacrosse players of rape has been arrested for murder. 
• Easter and Mother's Day sure are close together this year.
• Girl builds life sized Barbie --- with the exception of that small head, she's kind of hot. 

Possum Kingdom

I have no idea of the people involved or where "Hells Gate Loop" is at PK Lake, but this photo taken this afternoon is insane.

Texas Deputy Killed By Inmate This Afternoon

As I was watching a tense hearing involving a Wise County inmate this afternoon,  a tragedy was happening elsewhere in the state:

The University Of Texas Just Took Possession Of 6,643 Gold Bars?

I'm not sure I understand this, but I think it's because a guy who made half a billion dollars on credit default swaps in the mortgage meltdown told them to. His reasoning (I think): If everyone who owns gold on paper actually asked to have that gold delivered, there would be a huge run and there wouldn't be enough gold to go around. So UT better get while the getting's good. The value of the Evil Empire's gold bars is almost $1 billion.

As the value of the metal reached an all time high today of $1,489 an ounce, something feels very apocalyptic about this.

It's Not Antoine Dodson Quality . . .

. . . but Eric Hubbard explaining at the 30 second mark what the tornado did with his tasty burger is pretty funny.

Monday Afternoon Pick Me Up

Wait a second. Is that McLovin? Twenty-one year old McLovin?

Source.