Does This Look Like A Man Who . . .

. . . well . . . uh . . . let's just say you girls do not want to get a certain Christmas present from him. (The more modest members of the audience may not wish to click on that link. It definitely is an "oh, my").

(Thanks, Michelle.)

Senate Report Released On Kenneth Copeland Yesterday

Copeland Property Near Newark, Texas

What the committee was able to uncover was an extravagant lifestyle featuring a $6 million mansion and an aircraft.

Auditors were able to determine that in 1995, 15 Copeland family members were on the church payroll, earning salaries totaling $1.5 million.

The Copelands' salaries then totaled more than $600,000.

The audit was able to determine that their $20 million jet was used for personal reasons including vacations and shopping trips.

The Copelands were also accused of operating for-profit businesses on church property. Also, Copeland allegedly received an estimated $2.1 million birthday gift from supporters urged to contribute to the cause.

Full story.

Random Friday Morning Thoughts

• TCU fans that are aware of the OSU President's "Little Sisters of the Poor" comment, you will absolutely love this. And I mean love it.
• Mrs. LL did really well post surgery. Even though she's in pain, I think she's so excited about the prospect of the pain stopping after two months that she's giddy.
• Weird to have the doctor come out into the waiting room post surgery and ask for "Mr. Green" to update me. That's never happened to me before. And with her mother there as well, I felt like she deserved priority on the update.
• Cutting up Motrin pills into smaller pieces makes me feel like a drug dealer. 
• Looking around the waiting room at a surgery center made me speculate as to what body part was wrong with the other people. 
• Fiona on NYE.
• Watched a bit of Money Drop last night: I think those contestants are actors. And the build up/delay (like in Deal or No Deal) is what keeps me from watching game shows.
• Dallas had its lowest murder rate in almost 50 years last night  year with 148 homicides. The breakdown: Ninety percent of the city's murder victims were either black or Hispanic, with blacks accounting for more than half. Eighty-seven percent were men, and 64 percent were age 34 or younger.
• On the day that the Aggies play in the Cotton Bowl, former A&M, Alabama, and TCU coach Dennis Franchione gets the head coaching job at Texas State (which will always be Southwest Texas State to me.)  Man, what a drop. 
• The goofy talk show host on KLIF this morning thought it was "fantastic" that the Birther yelled from the House gallery yesterday. 
• Local officials now want to contest a strip club's liquor license even though they knew the club was being built near the south exit of DFW Airport for a couple of years? Good write up about it including the complaint letter here. 
• There was a seven year old who was killed while getting off a bus in Kaufman County yesterday. Stop! Man, I get really nervous when I see kids get off school buses. 
• Mark Davis this morning: "If you see someone with a flag lapel pin, don't you know what political persuasion they are?" Yep. 

Paris Hilton Still Has It

Well, This Is Off To A Fine Start

 During the reading of Article II, Section I of the Constitution -- the clause that requires the president of the United States to be a "natural born citizen," an unidentified woman in the gallery screamed "Except Obama! Except Obama!" Politico's Marin Cogan adds that the woman yelled, "Help us, Jesus!" She was removed immediately. UPDATE: I'm told that the woman who made the disruption was Theresa Cao, a birther activist and supporter of court-martialed birther Lt. Col. Terry Lakin. On December 16, she told WorldNetDaily that she was "taking his message to the White House and Congress." 


Source.

Edit: Funny - Rep. Pete Sessions misses oath of office but still takes part in the House the next day thereby violating the Constitution.

Mrs. LL Pre-op

Edit: So far, so good. If that girl could take pain medication, it would be much better. But she came out of surgery and made a joke with a giggle, so Hour One is fine.

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• So the Homeless-Man-With-A-Golden-Voice gets a job offer while the smokinggun.com releases his criminal history.
• Mrs. LL has surgery on wrist #1 this morning. I guess that means I'm becoming a nurse this afternoon.
• The Dallas Morning News will pull its hair out with its new pay-for-content policy. Currently, if the paper ever has a scoop in its morning paper, you'll hear it on WBAP, KRLD and KLIF just like those stations had discovered the info themselves. Will this change? I doubt it. And throw in how someone with a subscription will copy and paste the story on the Internet causing an exponential dissemination of the story, and you've got a DMN failed bit.
• Finally, I've beaten my two week long head cold. Sheesh. 
• I wonder if that guy that put up the Christmas lights on my house will come back to take them down? Uh, oh. 
• Wow: The iPhone 3GS (the one I still own) will now be $49 from AT&T.
• Congress reciting the Constitution today will give rise to some great and awkward Jon Stewart clips. 
• Interesting story of a former coach and high school star having his probation revoked in a Tarrant County case involving teacher/student sex. But did the judge really need to go into drama mode and announce that "you're being expelled"?
• Fox 4 News' morning show during the 5:00 a.m. half hour was having technical difficulties like nobody's business. It even caused Tim Ryan to get pissed.
• Tow days ago a guy on my jogging trail heading the other way yelled out at me "There's a dog back there but I'm not sure he'll bite." Huh? A couple of hundred yards up was a big dog with his back to me. I turned around. 
• Coach news: Wade Phillips got a job as defensive coordinator with the Houston Texans, the University of Michigan may make a run at TCU's Gary Patterson, and the Evil Empire finally talked someone into being its defensive coordinator but is still looking for someone to run the offense. 
• Idiocracy: Some Texas state rep named Gallego has introduced a bill (H.B. 137) requiring a person who has been convicted of DWI to obtain a driver's license with "a distinctive symbol or marking on the face of the license" which would reveal the existence of the conviction. First timers could get the symbol removed after three years. I never knew the biblical "mark of the beast" was actually "the mark of the State." 

KSCS Changing Formats To, Uh, Country

I haven't listened to the station in years, but in the nineties I thought Dorsey and Hawkeye were entertaining. They will still be with the station (which is running without disc jockeys right now) but they may be the only ones. It will soon be "relaunched" as "New Country" and begin playing "the biggest acts in country music [with] the intent to be playing the most country music in North Texas." Translated: They've got to do something every now and then.

If they'd only have a "People to People" program, I'd be in.  (That's a wheels off online local radio swap-your-stuff-show for you non Wise County folks.)

Source

Wednesday Morning Pick Me Up: Alternative Version

I know my rabid conservative Wise County audience, and this has to make your heart flutter.

The new Congress gets sworn in today which means Nancy Pelosi is no longer Speaker of the House.  Wake me when they start proposing budget cuts.

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts

• Hey, that crazy glass house featured in Ferris Bueller's Day Off is for sale. I'll grab my checkbook. 
• And that movie might be a little overrated. 
• WBAP had a guy on this morning representing the Christian group predicting the rapture on May 21, 2011. (Which is silly, because we all know when it will end based upon the comments of 2012 Guy.)  But as proof, the guest today cited the "Gay Pride Movement" as an indication of the end of the world. 
• If I were to rate the months, January and February would be at the bottom. 
• The "scandal" regarding the videos shown on the U.S.S. Enterprise seems silly.
• Any of you guys that flew out to the TCU game in Pasadena use Virgin Air? Let me hear from you. 
• I saw last night that singer Gerry Rafferty died which rang a slight bell with me. Then I read that he recorded Baker Street and high school memories came flooding back to me. 
• Jerry Jones will probably announce Jason Garrett the head coach today -- and if he does so, one thing is certain: He walk up to the podium with no notes and wing it. 
• One thing is certain: If a bar opens in Decatur, the cops are going to target it. First it was Frilly's, then Fat Daddy's, then Bono's. 
• I'm not sure I understand the Messenger's Facebook strategy. They'll post breaking news to Twitter with a link to a summary of the story on its Facebook page. Not sure where the ad revenue is with that. 
• A prostitution sting in Grapevine with pictures. Uh, it ain't Pretty Woman. 
• The 2nd Grader in the House apparently has been using the area under the love seat in the game room as her own personal storage shed. 
• It sounds like gas prices are about to go through the roof. I'm mean, it's going to get bad.
• More proof I'm a Sports Genius: Didn't the Mavericks just lose an important guy for the year with a knee injury? Short playoff run is now guaranteed.
• Viral video yesterday: Japanese marathon runner turning the wrong way seconds before finish line (but that paled in comparison to the views of "Homeless Man With Radio Voice" that was posted everywhere --- which seems a little fishy for some reason.)

Wise County Republican Officials

Yeah, it's blurry. But when you steal off Facebook, you can't be too choosy.

I'm Posting Something Cute

Of course, my puppy who graduated from the University of I'm Not A Dumb Dog, wouldn't find herself in that position.  Perhaps, Maybe.

Oh, heck, she'd drown if I wasn't over there within a second to save her.

Does This . . .

. . . look like a couple than ran up a $5,000 bill at a Dallas strip club last night and then fled. Why yes, yes it does.

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts

• Although it's still kind of hard to figure out, the Dallas Morning News has announced it will start charging for some of its online contact. And by "some" it sounds like any story authored by a Dallas Morning News reporter. This will be interesting.
• And in one of the comments on the story, someone used the phrase/words: "sesquipedalian verbosity." Wow. 
• One year ago at this very moment, I was on a completely vacant Costa Rican beach. 
• I think Jon Gruden does an awful color commentary job. Last night, while commenting on Stanford QB Andrew Luck during the Orange Bowl, he said, "He's an incredibly accurate passer which is often the most overlooked aspect of the position." Really? Accuracy is overlooked?
•  I've never thought being very bright is a requirement to be an NFL coach. Case in point: John Madden.
• Weird: News of over 3,000 birds falling dead to the ground in Arkansas over the weekend. They now believe they were spooked by fireworks and then crashed into each other and objects. 
• The "feel" of our courthouse has changed a lot over 20 years. And not in a good way.
• I still haven't seen Inception because all I can think of is that it will be like Memento and Memento hurt my head. 
• Are we headed for record breaking low temperatures around Monday, January 17th? Some people think so. 
• Forgot to mention how weird it was to see that the Rose Bowl was on ESPN. 
• The new House of Representatives will read the Constitution out loud. Let the showboating begin. 
• And then they've scheduled a vote to repeal Obamacare. Let the showboating really begin. 
• We got news yesterday of another wrongful Dallas County conviction -- this one caused a man to be incarcerated for 30 years. Hey, the next time you're on a jury and the judge tells you to find the defendant not guilty if you have a reasonable doubt about his guilt, do it. 
• Ended up watching most of the original pilot of Six Feet Under last night before I went to sleep. Greatness.
• Edit: Forgot to mention Rick Perry throwing millions of taxpayer money at one of his buddies.

Fatality At 287 and Business 287 South Of Decatur

Traffic is backed up big time (especially northbound.) But WBAP called it an "hour backup" which is, uh, very wrong.

Story.

And Channel 5's Tammy Dombeck wins the "I don't know those small towns" award as she took about 30 seconds this morning to talk about the wreck and pointed out the Saginaw cutoff in Tarrant County. She even warned people in Newark who would be heading into Fort Worth to look out for slow traffic.

To make the morning weirder, there were a series of about five fires on the east side of 287 about a mile away. If it was a controlled burn, someone forgot to tell the local fire departments.

And Now The Beating Officially Begins.

Story.

And if you thought that was just for tonight, think again. The westbound lanes are closed for several months! The westbound lanes will be diverted into eastbound lanes (separated by a concrete barrier) which means a logjam in both directions of biblical proportions.

Wait For It

 Edit: In defense of the kid, a commenter points out the lyrics to Jesus Loves The Little Children. Interesting.

Lunch Time Pick Me Up: Chloe Sevigny Delivers Sandwich