I Hope There Is More To This Story

The new Denton Police twitter feed is a little addicting. This poor girl was arrested in the middle of the night a few hours ago for speeding. Speeding? It's one of two traffic violations you cannot be arrested for in Texas. The other is "Open Container."

"I can't think about that right now. If I do, I'll go crazy. I'll think about that tomorrow. "

OK, we all know that Gov. Perry suggested that Texas could secede from the United States, and we all know that's not going to happen. But I'm very confused by an article from the great Bud Kennedy of the Star Telegram and a blog post by the Texas Monthly (with the brilliant name of "Secessional Healing") that argue Texas can't secede because the U.S. Constitution says that it can't. Huh? Taken to its extreme yet logical conclusion: We all pick up our guns and tell the United States, "We're through! We're forming our own Republic once again!" And then we'd all do an about face and go sheepishly into the night after the U.S. replies, "You can't do that. That's against the law!" ?

"Because Everyone Needs And Excuse To Get Out Of Gym Class"

"I've Got A Feeling ..."

The Ticket talked about this gal the other day, and I've seen at least two other people write about her since then. She is Camille Cortinas. Her current claim to fame? She's the voice behind the kidnapping-of-the-mind song, "Lucky Day", which promotes the Texas Lottery. You can find a quick loading link to the song here. But I promise you, if you listen to it, it will be struck in your brain pan for the rest of the day. Or longer.

Pressing Question From Email Bag

Dear Mr. Green - Purveyor of Trust and Justice:* Have all McDonalds always charged a 50 cent dine in TAX on their orders? First time I noticed it yesterday when I stopped in Decatur for a quick snack.I guess they get your money one way or the other. Considering I haven't been inside a McDonald's in 15 years, I have no idea. But the masses must know the answer. ___________ * Ok, that part was made up Wow, a receipt was sent to me:

From The Liberally Lean Triple Doppler Weather Center

Random Friday Morning Thoughts

• Motorcycle craziness: Last night a guy tries to pass a truck on an entrance ramp from the George Bush Turnpike to the North Dallas Tollway, strikes the side cement guard, and his female passenger flies off the bike and over the side of the ramp landing 65 feet below. Oh, my. Her condition is unknown.
• John Madden retirement thought #1: The guy has always driven me nuts having become nothing but a caricature of himself. But if someone does anything for 30 years, that automatically happens.
• Madden thought #2: Someone pointed out that he never used sarcasm. I'm not sure he was sharp enough to use sarcasm.
• Madden thought #3: I caught a replay of a game on the NFL Network that Madden did about 10 years ago. It's amazing how much energy he's lost over the years. Ten years ago he was yelling the tiresome cliches of "This is as good as it gets! This is what it''s all about!" as the kickoff happened
• Madden thought #4: I wonder how much he has made simply by licensing his name to the Madden NFL video game.
• Edit: Extra Madden thought -- I didn't know he had about $12 million and three years left on his contract.
• President Barack Obama and his wife earned $2.73 million last year and paid $855,323 in federal taxes for 2008.
• Thunder is good.
• I really debated about posting the rump shaking video from yesterday. I just couldn't resist.
• Saw someone mention yesterday they are already sick of Susan Boyle of Britain's Got Talent. True that.
• I stumbled across The Jerry Springer Show last night. You know, I think he would get bored with guests coming on stage and fighting each other. Then again, pay me enough and I would happily host it. It'd be more fun that Wheel Of Fortune.
• Teach your kids that Jesus loves them and about racial stereotypes.
• Youtube has added full length movies and TV shows. Most of them are bad.Very bad.
• Fifty year old mother (of the year) has surgery so she can look like daughter. Not bad. May she be a role model to all mothers out there.
• Every time I see an old episode of Arrested Development on TV I stop down.
• And to all of you emailers that sent me the story of "High School Cheer Coach Fired After Posing Nude" -- why do you think I'd possibly be interested in that? Oh, yeah.
• Wise County drug connection?

I'm Insane Now

The Denton Police Department has a Twitter feed to update who has been booked into jail, what the charge was, and a link to their book-in photo? Oh, my. To make it crazier, the Denton Police have nothing to do with it. (Thank, Alice.)

Thursday Afternoon Pick Me Up

More proof that any holiday can be tricked up.

The Search Is Over For The Next Mrs. Green

Twerk Team-@ Transfers Ft Twerk Team - video powered by Metacafe

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• That water looks nasty.
• I'm not a hamburger guy, but everyone is talking about "Five Guys Burgers and Fries" which has opened in the Southlake Town Center.
• The Tea Party in Decatur was pretty interesting. But they didn't get the memo that it was supposed to be a non-partisan affair since the Obama bashing was front and center.
• And the first speaker, who seemed to be a very nice lady, spent a lot of time advocating "putting God back in school." That's a bit ironic since it was supposed to be an anti-big government rally and she was supporting government mandating religion in locally controlled schools.
• And there was a funny moment when sirens could be heard in the background and one of the protestors yelled, "They are coming for us!"
• Another funny moment was when one of the speakers supported term limits by saying, "We have them now! Vote out the incumbents after two terms regardless of who is running against them!" The very conservative assistant DA standing beside me mumbled, "I don't know about that."
• Remember Northwest softball star Britney Barnhill? In her sophomore year at The Evil Empire, she is 20-9 with a 2.73 ERA --- the best on the team.
• I've never cared much for the Rolling Stones, but I never get tired of listening to the opening of Gimme Shelter (but it's that female vocalist in the chorus that makes the song.)
• I discovered there's a free "ink edition" of dfw.com which is basically an entertainment section of the Star Telegram (although I have no idea if it is associated with the paper). Man, it's great. And edgy.
• Crazy hypothetical thought: If Texas voted to secede from the U.S., would the U.S. send in military or let us go? (Side note: Rick Perry played the Tea Party bit very well.)
• The confederate flag made an appearance at the Tea Party in Burleson. Incredible.
• OK, I'm done with Tea Party Talk.
• I'll say it again: The documentary Thrilla in Manila currently being shown on HBO is absolutely great.
• Is Seth Rogen in every comedy these days?
• I remember one morning in the 1990s that there was a line of people in Decatur 100 yards long waiting to buy the newest Beanie Babies. (Very funny video of that silly craze here.)
• I've not posted some comments that attack another commentor's kids.

Hey, Kid, That's Kinda Funny

Officer Randy White's Widow Appears on Channel 8.

Link. (Thanks emailer, David.)

Paul Revere made an appearance

Tea Party Pic

Kind of interesting: You can see pictures from across the nation being posted on Twitter here.

Shout Out

Any dentist who can get me into his office with no notice and greets me with "I read on your blog this morning that you were having a little trouble" deserves a public note of thanks. Hero of the Moment: Dr. Dan Selz. (Funny observation: An elderly patient kind of complaining about having a different dental hygienist clean his teeth -- "You aren't the one who did it last time!" -- while also admitting he hadn't been there since 2005.)

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts

• We've now got a "Border Czar." Note: If your job description has "Czar" in it, odds are you're in charge of a problem that can't be solved.
• Last week I mentioned I wasn't sold on the Rangers after their 3-0 start and now they've lost five straight. (I've got a friend that claims I have the ability to jinx any team.)
• I like the terms "minx" and "vixen."
• I like the Star-Telegram's Bud Kennedy but he's going to catch grief for writing today that "State's Rights" is "a quaint throwback to the segregation era."
• Does every media outlet have to play "Tax Man" by the Beatles today?
• Saw a longtime female defendant up at the courthouse yesterday who looked a little chunky. Courthouse personnel conclusion: She must finally be off the dope.
• Shocked to hear that a 30 year employee at the courthouse in the maintenance department was let go. There has to be a story behind that.
• I think I've filed a tax extension on this day every year of my working life.
• I'm never interested in celebrity divorces.
• Someone yelled at me in the comments last week because I revealed the ending of a documentary. At first I thought it was a silly criticism -- should I not be able to reveal the ending of a documentary, say, about the Civil War? -- but if you don't know, you don't know.
• I don't know who Michael Irvin's partner is on his radio show, but that guy is the most annoying person ever.
• I'm currently reading Jesus, Interrupted. Fascinating.
• I really don't listen to that much music, but I can't avoid that "Poker Face" song.
• Dear My Dentist In Bridgeport: I've got a developing situation. Please work me into your schedule today when I call.
• The Cowboys released their schedule yesterday so I started thinking about planning one of my football road trips. In November Dallas plays at Green Bay and the day before Michigan plays at the University of Wisconsin. That would work.
• Blogging flashback: You think this guy is regretting buying two high priced condos in Dallas?

While You Were Sleeping

On 4/14/09 at approximately 9:25 p.m. a group of motorcycles was traveling northbound on W. Loop 820 South approaching I-30. Two riders accelerated ahead of the group then slowed down. Two more riders accelerated ahead of the main group and came upon the first two that had slowed down. One of the riders was not able to slow down enough to avoid striking the rear of another motorcycle. That rider (26 year old black male) was ejected from his bike and died at the scene from the injuries that he sustained. The other rider (37 year old black male) of the motorcycle that he struck was transported to Harris Hospital and listed in stable condition. Both of the involved riders were wearing helmets and it is unknown at this time if alcohol or drugs were involved. (Thanks emailer)