Relatives Try To Kill Old Man . . .

. . . by taking him to Hooters to celebrate his 100th birthday.

Endless (Kind Of) Loop

Youtube now has the video of the (alleged) drunk hitting the Dallas County Sheriff's Office car last week. For some reason, the AP thought it would be a good idea to loop it a couple of times. (Proof of original AP version here.)

Blonde Haired Women. Tall Black Guys. Let's All Dance.

So after Baylor gets beat by the worst team in the Big 12 on Thursday, the chances of the Bears making this week's NCAA Tournament were getting dim. So I sit down today at 5:00 p.m. to see if they make it. The Lord must not have liked the Bears skipping Sunday night services because every other team was announced until it came down to the very final slot.....yep, the Bears made it after much wailing and gnashing of teeth. But, then again, so did UTA.

An Emailer . . .

. . . sent along a link to what could be the "And Another" Hall Of Fame.

Girl Doesn't Let Boyfriend Look At Cheerleaders

Allow me to translate for those that don't speak mexican: "That boy better get control of his scene right now. If it's this bad when you're dating, she'll gouge your eyes out once you get married. Uh, and don't forget the new Triple Supreme Burrito at Taco Bell. Hola, salsa lovers!'

Somebody . . .

. . . emailed me wanting to promote this event that's happening in Wise County. I really wasn't interested until I found the above pic on the website. If a boy dragging a pig isn't clean, healthy fun then what is?

Reader Free For All

Today I've been sent links to:

- This kinky sex story (which is not the way I will spend my weekend.)
- This video of a lady having a bad day at the salad wagon.
- This video involving a Grand Central Station prank.
- This video involving a Canadian brother and sister who are denied their incestuously love. (Pseudo?)
- And this photo from an I-Phone (actually a couple of days ago.)

Hey, I'm not saying they are all great, but I would feel guilty if I just ignored everybody.

Edit: I think I got the links straightened out now.

Afternoon Background Music Of Limited Interest

So I just got through reading a Dallas Morning News' review of R.E.M.'s show at SXSW two days ago in Austin. The story ended with, "You can hear the complete concert at www.npr.org." Well, I'll be. You can.

And Another

We really have been deprived of the salacious details between this 28 year old and her 14 year old paramour, but there's enough to go on.

First, there are some things that creep me out: The thin, tricked up eyebrows; a ruddy complexion; and a look on her face that just screams, "I'll &^%$ you up if you call the police!!!!" But the last trait kind of turns me on. So it all kind of cancels out.

Verdict: Probation. But I'll make it a long five year one so as not to appear "soft on crime." I'm trying to send a message to other teachers out there.

Next case.

(Thanks emailer Tad.)

Edit: Updated picture. Small but hot.

German Invasion

Several reports indicate that the big German guy that plays for the Dallas Mavericks (whose window of opportunity, by the way, has closed) will be buying this fixer-upper in Dallas.

New Spin Material

Paradise has a new newspaper. (And even a URL but with no website.)

Although the first issue sets a trend: Put the name of every kid in Paradise in the paper. (Heck, it works for Dave Campbell's Texas Football.)

Friday Morning Pick Me Up

I would buy anything these girls were selling.

Friday Morning Observations

-It's been over two years since this happened, but a judge found the girl above (the one who is face down and kissing the concrete in Deep Ellum) not guilty yesterday.
- Did you notice that gas prices are insane? Dumb question. Have they ever been higher? I don't think so (but I can't recall what they were last year at their peak.)
- My Bush Tragedy book is really good. I didn't know Karl Rove's mom committed suicide and his dad turned-a-gay and ran off when he was a kid. (Not that that's a "good" thing, but it is a tidbit I didn't know.)
- Well Baylor lost in the first round of the Big 12 tournament proving they don't want to be invited to the NCAA Tourney. But bids are announced on the Sabbath, so they've got that going for them.
- Hypothetically, I had a client ask me over the last month if I truly believed him. Amazingly, I've never had that happen before.

In Honor Of 80 Degree Friday

For Our One Canada Reader

"Rob Leth from the Global Television Network in Canada" Edit: Sheesh, it's been removed. And I'm not real sure why. It was just a reporter getting run over by a sled but doing the most amazing 360 degree flip before coming down. Edit: As others have done in the comments, here's a new link.

As I sit in the Fort Worth hearing room for driver's license suspensions for the third time in as many days, I noticed (in a day old paper) that former Bridgeport coach Tina Slinker has been fired at UNT.

They Just Keep Coming

Story.

With all the nutty stories this week, I'm reminded of a funny moment between me and my dad last Christmas.

Me (softly, deadpan and looking off in the distance): "When did the world go crazy?"
Dad (softly, deadpan and also looking off in the distance): "I don't know."

(Thanks emailer Gigi.)

Random Morning Observations

- If you want to see an alleged DWI driver crash into a Dallas Sheriff's car, violently, go here.
- The Today Show has a Q&A with a call girl that is fairly interesting.
- I got a Susan B. Anthony dollar back as change the other day fron a convenience store. I hate the Susan B. Anthony dollar
- The Big 12 Basketball Tournament begins today. Good times. Not good times, however, for my Lady Bears who were upset by the Evil Empire yesterday. But I love this quote from Baylor's coach: "If I wasn't so young in my career, I'd resign tonight." Preach on, sister.
- Over the last week, we've had pretty white college girls murdered in North Carolina and Alabama. Arrests have been made of black guys in both cases. This won't help race relations.
- For all you knuckleheads that think that one snowstorm absolutely disproves global warming, does the death of 12 soldiers in 3 days in Iraq mean The Surge is not working?
- I think Geraldine Ferraro got a raw deal. But I appreciate how she didn't back down (despite resigning.}
- I'm now reading The Bush Tragedy.
- I got stopped in Decatur yesterday by a guy I represented in a court case as a court appointment a few years back. I managed to get him probation for meth but he told me he screwed it up and ended up with a seven year sentence. He's obviously out now and sounds like he is doing well. (Although getting a job has to be hard.)