You OK Manny?

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Two Men On The Loose. Probably Not Real Smart

MINERAL WELLS -- Authorities were searching Monday for two convicted burglars who escaped from a minimum-security West Texas lockup. The Texas Department of Criminal Justice identified the inmates as Joshua Hall and Carlos Goff, both 21, who were missing during a 3:45 a.m. inmate count Monday. Both men were wearing regular street clothes, the department said in a news release. Hall was serving a 5-year sentence for a 2006 Jefferson County burglary conviction, and Goff was serving 5 years for 2004 burglary convictions out of Denton County . . . . Inmates are assigned there when they come within one year of parole eligibility or release, the TDJC said.

Source.

And make that an extremely minimum security facility.

Edit: Nope, not that smart at all.

Oh, My

Link. (Although some of my more sensitive viewers will find it offensive and, uh, bizarre.) As the guy who found it says: "But every now and again something comes along that is so amazingly compelling that it demands to be linked from every web site in the universe." Edit: White boy parody. Edit #2: Jon Stewart finally played a clip of this on 5.15.07.

Just Heard This Advertised

It's not exactly the Boat Show, but I guess someone is interested. (Link. And it actually says in there, "fun for the entire family." Pray for those families.)

Dallas Has Gone A-Gay

Of the two finalists for mayor of Dallas, one of them is gay. If he wins, that would be a trifecta since the Dallas County Sheriff and Dallas County Judge are also a-gay. Not that there's anything . . . .

Edit: At least somebody in Dallas tried to make an issue of it.

Trump v. Cuban

In case you missed it, Donald Trump and Mark Cuban are acting like spoiled brats.

From Trump last week:

"Mark Cuban was extremely embarrassed when he copied 'The Apprentice' [with 'The Benefactor'] and failed," Trump raged. "They threw him off television like a dog. I wrote him a note and I said, 'Mark, you have absolutely no television persona. I wish you would have spoken to me previously or before you did this. I could have told you it was gonna fail.' And he failed. Same thing with the Mavericks. The Mavericks have a great team. They'll never win with Mark Cuban as the owner because he is not a winner."

Cuban today:

"I guess Donald is still upset that he can't afford to buy an NBA team. No doubt the cash requirements of more than $10,000 created a problem for him. Hopefully he will sell enough Trump Steaks, Trump Perfume and Trump Dolls to save some money and buy a team. Then we can see how he does. Until then he is a wannabe that needs to get a new spiel."

Stay classy, Dallas.

Brit Dressed To Go To The Decatur WalMart?

Dennis Rodman Says "Happy Mother's Day"

Forgot About This

As I was walking up to a driver's license hearing in Fort Worth last week, I was approached by a lady that asked me, "Do you know anything about UPS?" Uh.....no. (Other than the weird slogan of "What can brown do for you?")

Anyway, she tells me she's been looking for a UPS drop box and the only one she found was at this office building. "It said 'no pickups' but I put my package in there anyway. I hope it gets across town by tomorrow!" she told me.

So odd. Why not just drive it across town if it's that important? And why in the world would you risk putting it in the drop box?

(Pic is of the actual drop box where, I presume, her package still sits.)

Gettin' Licquored Up

"Meanwhile, the sale of all alcoholic beverages, including by the drink, passed in the city of Bridgeport by a lopsided 271 to 110 margin, according to Wise County Clerk Sherry Parker-Lemon."

All local election results over at the Messenger.

Hey, We Made The Paper

In a story about the downfall of the Rhome Traffic Cam, this blog got mentioned and one of the posted comments was even quoted. That's a first. Good job.

Edit: I completely overlooked this sentence in the story: "[T]he tickets start at $179, with Nestor [the company providing the camera] receiving about $25 for each one issued." Incredible. Completely incredible.

Just Once I Want To See This At Lone Star Park

One of the dogs gets a little loose in Turn Two causing a doggie spin out. However, he will not be denied.

What the?

In light of the recent herpes crab mite crisis at the courthouse, the powers at be have installed a loudspeaker with a recording to scare off the pigeons. I just heard it for the first time I second ago and I think it would scare a young child (or weak man) to death. It runs for about one minute on a loop. It starts with sound of a giant locust, and then builds up to what sounds like about 10 monkeys on crack. Then, for the big finish, it is some crazed animalistic screaming of I don't know what, but it sounds like that screeching noise from the zombies of Night of the Living Dead. I'll try to get a recording of it. It's gold. But you can't imagine all the people on the courthouse square that look up with the "what the?" look. Edit: I captured the audio! Please, please, please listen until the 20th second. (The audio was recorded with a cell phone from underneath the awning of Sweetie Pie's Ribeyes. It's raw and hasn't been enhanced at all.)

Speaking Of Headlines

(From the Boston Globe.) The headline combined with the picture is kinda funny if I were immature.

Since I Have To Deal With . . .

. . . prosecutors all the time, I can't stop staring at the headline.

My Excuse

I am tormented by dreams. Every night (and the best I can tell they occur around 4:00 a.m. or 5:00 a.m.), I'm involved in some kind of dream-state trauma. The dreams are never life threatening, but it's always a serious problem that I can't solve. (Missing law school finals, house's foundation cracking by a foot, teeth falling out, relationship falling apart, etc.) I wake up every morning shortly before dawn and I'm exhausted. My body is tense, I have to take 15 seconds to figure out my life is still the same, and I feel like I've been through the ringer. It happens every night. And I never have a pleasant dream. Edit: I had another one Friday nght/Saturday morning. Weird. I went to some "Mad Max" type place, was stripped down, spray painted with a protective latex coat, and then sent out amongst burning cars, makeshift tanks, and warriors. (I have no idea where that came from.) Edit #2: My dream Saturday night was that I had to explore a house I just purchased. It was the house of the murders described In Cold Blood. And in an odd twist, I was doing the exploring with Fox 4's Lari Barager.

Don't Forget, Folks

The State Track meet is this weekend in Austin. (You can thank me for this PSA later.)

Edit: One of the many, many sources here and here.

Fox 4 . . . (pause) . . . News

Fox 4 put Jeff Crilley on the case of the missing 12 year old girl from Paris, Texas who was allegedly sexually assaulted by William Rhone of Jacksboro.

The highlight of the story was the interview of neighbor Jean Wolfe who talked to the missing 12 year old for an hour and half before she later went missing: "I asked her again about her family . . . and she was very evasive. And I asked her 'So you're eighteen?' and she said 'yeah' and she had told William she was eighteen . . . . He made a . . .uh . . . mistake, trusting someone and believing somebody. But he did not harm her."

Fox 4 has the video of the story here.