Ladies and Gentlemen, I Present To You: Our Future

How many times have I  mentioned how I want to live in a hut in the jungle of Costa Rica?  I'll let the Faithful Readers come visit from time to time. No charge.

Good lord.

And In Today's Klan Humor News

Oklahoma mayor apologizes after husband dresses up as KKK member in Halloween 'prank' https://t.co/BNZ12KcogH pic.twitter.com/ilvKQj8IXd

— Fox News (@FoxNews) November 3, 2015

Oh, come on! What's up with all this political correctness? It's fun to dress up as a Klan member. It has no secret meaning. People do it all the time.

Edit: And forgot to add that I hate Illinois Nazis.

Look What Was In My Office Yesterday

A client came in to visit and brought his dog with him. I told him to bring her on back and let her run around.

Hey, you big city and silk suited lawyers. How much fun did you have yesterday?

Her name was Paris.

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts

• I'm getting so old that sometimes I'm more curious about the background of the RTG pic than the girl. I wonder where this was taken? 
• A Frisco mom allegedly got liquored up at a Halloween party in Frisco and drove into a pond. Corby Davidson of the Ticket had a funny line when he said, "I don't know why stuff like that doesn't happen every day. She's probably one of the thousands of women up there married to some contractor who makes a ton of money and sits around drinking Franzia all day." Side note: Kinda Hot. 
• A guy named Jose Puentes was sentenced for sending one pound of meth in the mail to Fort Worth by a federal judge. He got 30 years in federal prison. Holy cow. How insane is that? Our drug laws don't need reforming, right? (Side note: The prosecutor's office sent out a press release to brag about it.) 
• The last Waco biker is out of jail over five months after his arrest and after his bond was reduced to $50,000. Uh, lawyer: He was entitled to a PR bond or a bond he could afford 90 days after arrest if he wasn't indicted. And he not been indicted. 
• The rest of the Family In The House to me: "Can we have a Chinese student stay with us over Thanksgiving?"  I slowly look up, slowly turn my head towards them, and a huge question mark forms in the air. I'll give you an update. (If that happens, I might check with Donald Trump on how to "deal with him".)
• I'll probably do a separate post about this but the latest Police State video has emerged and it's from Texas. A guy goes to Godley City Hall to complain about a neighbor, a cop comes out and asks for his ID (the guy has no legal obligation to present it) and initially refuses, the cop eventually tells him to stand up, the guy tries to pull out his ID, is then slow to turn around, gets tazed, and then "charged" with resisting arrest (which he didn't do because the law requires the use of force against the officer.) That officer just lost his job. And he needs to.
• I believe there is a growing number of some young officers, not the veterans, who believe the rules do not apply to them. And that is what happens when those far up the chain don't hold them accountable because they don't care or, shockingly, sanction unethical/illegal actions.
• I can't stop laughing about Dez Bryant's monkey (named "Dallas Bryant"). But it got better yesterday at Jason Garrett's press conference when someone asked him a tongue in cheek question about whether he knew about the monkey. Garrett seriously replied: "I have not met Dallas. I've heard stories that he has a monkey. There has been visual evidence of that.'' That's golden. 
• I watched an episode of All In The Family the other day. Verdict: It was very, very funny. But it was funnier because of the shock value of the non-PC things that were in the script that would never be on regular TV today.
• WBAP's Hal Jay is really named Hal Harbuck?  And I saw a guy joke somewhere that his wheeze laugh sounds like Mutley. (I realize there may be 1% of you who have ever heard of Mutley and less than that have heard of Hal Jay.)
• Hot Sports Opinions: (1) When the official college playoff rankings come out tonight, Baylor will be #5, (2) TCU's Trevone Boykin is the best player in the country, (3) There is nothing weirder than TCU's coach Gary Patterson asking the West Virginia coach immediately after TCU's win against them, "What are our chances against Baylor?" Uh, coach, you have Oklahoma and Oklahoma State on your schedule before Baylor. 
• Special note to Dennis Prager fan: I flipped over to him yesterday and he was dogging some politician (Hillary?) and said something along the lines of "if your leaders aren't truthful, it will lead to the downfall of society." (I am certain about the last three words.) Then he read an ad for a cream that cures arthritis pain. 
• If I see one more story about Blue Blue . . .  oh no . . . 

Uber Driver vs. Drunk Passenger: Who Ya Got?

That escalated quickly around the 2:15 mark. (Language warning.)

(Special note to Ticket listeners: He drove bus! And that ride is closed!)

I'm Officially Concerned About The Media

This was up for at least half the day yesterday. It is the web equivalent of "Above The Fold".  There is a "latest news" graphic at the top. Underneath it are five links which are basically links to ads on the Star-Telegram site.  And then a graphic/link of  More Latest News.  But this is at the top of a news site web page. (I understand the standard newspaper has a real estate section with standard real estate "stories" that are paid ads. That's been going on for forty years). 

But this is the home page of the Star-Telegram. 

The only other story in view is about Blue Bell which seems to get lots of mentions by all the news organizations. But who could pay for that type of glowing media coverage? 

Breaking Cowboy News: PETA Is Demanding Dez Bryant's Monkey Be Removed From His Custody

(Not the actually monkey and none of these guys are Dez Bryant)

At least I just heard that from David Moore of the Dallas Morning News with "breaking news" on The Ticket.

Link coming.

Edit: Link.

Random Monday Morning Thoughts

• Mrs. LL and I had the best time on Halloween night. We wanted to hand out candy to trick or treaters but soon discovered that The Family Pup and Family Rescue Dog go crazy at a doorbell or if we sat on the front porch without them. So we opened the front door on a beautiful night, put up one of those indoor dog fences, and pulled up chairs to the door on the inside of the house. 
• I sometimes give the impression that my little life is all wonderful, but I am just like you. There can be issues which cause a ton of stress. 
• How far has the country developed? It took until 1972 before the Supreme Court struck down state laws that made it a crime to provide birth control to unmarried couples. (Yes, you read that correctly.) 
• That Twittering Judge will be part of the Texas Supreme Court which will hear oral arguments today on this issue: Is a school district liable if it files truancy charges against a parents who home school their children because the school district believes they were "failing to teach their children educational basics." But the parents justify any teaching deficiencies because they "were waiting to be transported to heaven with the second coming of Jesus Christ." This will be great. A far right conservative court having to make a decision regarding devout Christians. 
• Sports: (1) If a football team can be bi-polar, the Longhorns are Exhibit A. (2) This may be the most dramatic sports weekend ever. College football was bizarre with many crazy finishes and we may have seen the greatest kick return ever. And even I got sucked into the World Series games because of the drama. (2A) I'm worried there may be a guy who is now this generation's Bill Buckner, (2B) ESPN was breaking down the Miami kick return like it was the Zapruder film. There is controversy over whether one of the player's knee was down. He was not called down on the field but they went to replay. You know what the rule is before you can overturn the "non-call"? There must be "irrefutable evidence" to the contrary that convinces the replay official "beyond all doubt." That standard is as high as it can get. The criminal justice system sentences people to death if there is only "no reasonable doubt" they are guilty. (4) I love "Surrender Cobra" photos. 
• The biggest Republican candidate problem right now is that they have to go over the top to appeal to the far right conservative base to get the nomination. At least they believe that's the only way you win the nomination. Then after one wins it, he (or she) has to back off and appeal to all of the electorate to win the general election.  That hacks off the conservative base and the general electorate has seen you act like a Rush Limbaugh or Dennis Prager. That's a problem. 
• Candidate Carley Fiorina may have a figurative self inflicted political wound. She was on one of the Sunday morning shows and (once she stopped talking about the "liberal media") she finally admitted she "misspoke" when she said that 92% of the job losses in President Obama’s first term belonged to women. Is "misspoke" a code word for "lie"? 
• There's news of a woman poisoning her own child in Dallas. That's right out of Sixth Sense if covertly done or Jonestown if overtly done.  
• There's a TV ad I've seen a couple of times for treatment of "relapsing multiple sclerosis ." I had no idea that was a huge problem. 
• I mentioned the Aggie Bonfire Memorial yesterday but here's a cool coincidence: There is part of the Memorial which notes that the bonfire did not occur in 1963 because of the Kennedy assassination. A few weeks back I wrote about going to watch the Aggie Band in downtown Fort Worth. Part of my notes were watching the final stage of the band, glancing over and seeing the Kennedy Memorial, and then going over and looking at it. 

Halloween Book In Photos Are The Best

11/01/2015 04:18:12 Baltazar, 26 yrs old ♉ DRIVING WHILE INTOXICATED https://t.co/rWrSAYThKV pic.twitter.com/G0WMvpxrgG

— Arrests by @DentonPD (@DentonPolice) November 1, 2015

Mrs. LL and I Went To Aggieland

A couple of weeks ago, I received a gift from someone who knows how much I love my silly and stupid college football trips. I received two tickets to Aggieland: It's the South Carolina Gamecocks vs. The Aggies. The game time would later be set for 11:00 a.m. I've got an early morning road trip. Me to Mrs. LL: "You in.?" Mrs. LL: "You kidding me? Oh, yes!"

• I tell her we leave at a particular time and yesterday we only leave 18 minutes late. My master plan has worked (we didn't have to leave at that particular time.)   I tell her she could sleep all the way down if she wanted to because of the early start. 
• Things got weird quickly. She doesn't go to sleep. Now that's odd. But not as odd as a vehicle all over the road traveling at a snail's pace in front of us on I-35 after Burleson. I don't say anything and just point. She says, "Yep. I see it." It is 6:35 or so in the morning. Within a minute the guy makes it to the exit and Mrs. LL says, "There you go, buddy. Good job." And then he undershoots the exit and goes into the median which seperates I-35 from the service road. It was a slow roll. Was he drunk? Did he just fall asleep? Was it a medical condition? (Was it even a "he"?) Mrs. LL yells at me, "Go back!" I say, "Just call 911!" She does. We note the exit number to communicate it to dispatch. She hangs up and says, "Go back" again. OK, I will. What if it is a medical issue and we could get there before dispatch and do something? Let's go.  I overshoot the next exit and miss it and have to go down a couple of miles. I want to go over I-35 and head back up. She tells me to take the service road. I take the service road. As we get back there we see flashing lights of an emergency vehicle but the lights go off and the vehicle moves on. The guy is gone. Mrs. LL thinks she might have seen the vehicle at a convenience store we passed on the way. We go to it and it is not there.
• We head to Aggieland again. That's a weird start.
• She sleeps the entire way and I pull into a convenience store at College Station. We go in. Uh, it's Halloween and we see this in the checkout line at 10:00 a.m. That's a guy. With a beard. In a dress.  I think. Mrs. LL snaps that  picture and as she does I whisper, "Be cool." As we walk back to the car she says, "You think that guy cares if someone takes his picture?" Good point.
• I just want to see a football game and experience Kyle Field. This has been an interesting morning. 
• And we head to the stadium. I was stunned by the lack of traffic for what would be a crowd of 100,000. We park a long way away because that will give us a chance to see the campus. As we walk, we see the memorial for the Aggie Bonfire Tragedy and now we know what we'll stop by after the game.
• I was at Kyle Field 20 years ago. With the renovations, it looks like a brand new stadium.
• We get to our seats and they are on the first row at the 40 yard  line. Holy cow. That's not the best seat if you care about the best view of the game (I don't), but it is absolutely the best place in the world if you care about the experience. I am feet away from the South Carolina bench. I get to hear and watch the players and the coaches. I get to watch the media. I tell Mrs. LL this is my greatest football trip ever.
• I'm so close that I can see the white board when the defensive unit regroups and the coach draws on it. If I were an Aggie secret agent, I could take a picture and immediately send it to the Aggie coaching staff. With as big a business as college football is (and as big of a business as betting is), how does that not happen every week?
• Funniest/Oddest taunt ever: A young Aggie fan behind me yells at a South Carolina trainer, "Hey, nice cargo pants!"
• There is a hot sideline reporter walking back and forth and she stops right under us. She is making  notes on a pad. I'm not saying that Mrs. LL covertly took a photo of her notes, but Mrs. LL took a photo of her notes. I haven't looked at them yet because it almost feels illegal. (It's not.)
• I knew football was intense, but I had no idea the sideline was so intense. There are leaders who will cuss out the younger guys. The coaches will cuss out anyone.
• Mrs. LL wants to take a "selfie" with me with the great view of the field in the background. I hate selfies and I remind her of that. A lady behind us hears us and asks, "You guys want your picture taken?" No problem. Done. She takes the pic, hands the phone back, smiles at me and says, "It's all about memories."  I smile and reply, "You're right. And you allowed me to keep my dignity by not being involved in a selfie in front of thousands of people." She laughs. 
• The security was  amazing. There is always someone walking by and scanning the crowd. And it needed to be there. I could jump six feet down in a second and be on the field. Here's my chance to be Will Farrell from Old School and be a streaker! (The thought didn't actually cross my mind. I'm joking. But the vision of doing it and a horrified crowd seeing old me on the big screen does make me laugh.)
• I had told Mrs. LL about the Aggie band, and I didn't think she understood. She is a huge band fan. At halftime she finally sees it. (I think she is still saying, "Wow.")
• The Aggie Band and The Corp have a common mindset: Discipline and doing your job right. 
• Football note: The Aggies started a freshman quarterback who everyone thinks will be a star. The offense was boring in first quarter. Then they went hurry up and took over the game. After two drives I turn to the guy next to me and tell him, "They look exactly like Baylor." And they did.
• One of the greatest Aggie traditions is that crazy swaying the crowd does as they touch the backs of the person beside them. This happens between the third and fourth quarters. Mrs. LL and I have worn maroon and I tell her to get ready because it is a sight to see. We join in and sway with the crowd. The moment is fantastic.
• After the game we walk towards the Bonfire Memorial.  I remind her I got lost on the Kansas campus a few weeks back and she says that wouldn't happen to her because she has a tremendous sense of direction. She momentarily gets lost but quickly figures the way back. Funny. 
• We both notice the craziest number of bicycles in the history of ever. I bet there was one set of bike racks with over 100 bikes locked up on them. (However, I'm still confused about the bike in a tree we see as we were almost off campus.) 
• I don't care who you are, go see that Memorial.  Everything about the design was done for a reason. The tributes to those kids are beyond moving. I will be honest: I tear up. No. I cry.  I'm not an Aggie, but even I realized I was standing on Aggie Holy Ground.

It's Halloween Weekend. Let's Get Out Of Here

That's Dangerous

They May Be More Dangerous

Hey, Six Flags Use To Have A Sombrero Ride!

The University of Louisville apologized to the school’s entire Hispanic community Thursday after a photo surfaced showing President James Ramsey among a group of staffers at a Halloween party dressed in matching stereotypical Mexican costumes. More. 

Random Friday Morning Thoughts

• Police shot and killed a guy in Mesquite this morning and it looks like it was all caught on tape by local news. This may or may not get bad. 
• I mentioned the line from Pulp Fiction earlier this week of, "What's Fonzie say!?" And today is Henry Winkler's birthday. 
• Man, I finally have gone back to watching local news in the morning and it has a different feel. I think the consultants have come in and yelled, "Do it with intensity!" Even the mild mannered traffic guy on Fox 4 looks at you and tells you, "I'm about to give you information to get to work on time." And they even projected that on a stretch of road in Dallas that the drive time is 19 minutes. Idiocracy.
• It's almost November and the Montague DA has still not released the records requested by the Wise County Messenger. Why? 
• Halloween is coming up and it was insane in Bridgeport back in the day. It was water balloons and "rotten eggs" that we would later throw at each other. My group of friends actually went to a grocery store (Foodway?) and met with the owner and asked if he had any rotten eggs in the back since Halloween was coming up. He gave us a case.
• On Halloween night, Scott Bilby and I launched rotten eggs at State Trooper Grant Drale from 50 yards away (we lobbed them). Trooper Drake for some reason had stopped someone on my dead end street. He lived down the road so he probably saw someone driving like an idiot in the middle of a TON of trick or treaters. Throwin eggs was dumb and stupid and disrespectful thing for us to do. But kids do stupid things. You know what would happen today? I'd be charged with a felony of Attempted Aggravated Assault With A Deadly Weapon. And my life would have been ruined. 
• And I'm going to dog Fox 4's Dan Godwin for this morning reporting that a 12 year old was custody for drawing a map and making a threat. That's fine. My problem was that he said the kid was charged with "exhibition of a firearm" even though he "didn't have an actual firearm. Huh? I don't know what any of that means.  Edit: I've received more than one communication that there is an obscure provision in the Texas Education Code that makes this a crime. If I'm wrong (and perhaps I am -- I'm on it), I'll admit it. 
• Hal Jay on WBAP said this morning that a particular Constitutional amendment changing the qualifications for president could actually happen because of the "influx" of Asians, Hispanics and Middle Easterners into this country. He named all three. Does everyone who works with him back off from their mics every morning?
• One expected thing and one odd thing about the Mavericks game last night: Expected: They got drilled 104-88 and the Mavs owner trash talked the other team before the game. Hey, he's the smartest guy in the room, right? Odd: Coach Rick Carlisle said after the game, "We really would have had to play a perfect game and from a shooting perspective, we couldn't hit a bull in the ass with a bass fiddle." What does that mean? It's like a high tone guy suddenly deciding to act like Art Briles and try to fire off some back porch country witticisms.
• I mentioned Natalie Merchant the other day because I'm still pissed off that a particular song wasn't played at Bass Hall which she had performed on MTV's Unplugged.   I tried to Google the MTV performance and  stumbled upon this performance by her at an outdoor festival. It is fantastic (although she might look a little drunk). She is truly happy and truly thanking everyone who supports her as she sings with unmitigated delight. 

Holy Cow! There Is Video Of The Twin Peaks Waco Shoot Out!

Video

Obviously something went wrong and a crime probably occurred and one or more people needed to be arrested. At least there would be probable cause to arrest one or more. But the Waco Police arrested 170 people.  It was a mass arrest and roundup. And the DA has gone forward with prosecution. You kidding me?

For you people in Waco, get your popcorn ready to see how the "prosecution" unfolds. Unfortunately, you'll be watching a ton of dismissals against people who spent their life savings on bonding out and attorneys.

That should not happen in this country.

Side note: Nice job to CNN for throwing in scantily clad Twin Peaks waitresses running. You are hereby warned ! Don't steal my Random Thought Girl concept!!! There are intellectual property laws!!!

Trump!!!

The best clips of the debate in seconds.

I've Never Been More Intimidated By Someone Arrested For A Seatbelt Violation

Let's Check In On The World Series

Video.

Wait. What? Ok, maybe that's legit. She might have a handicap that is not apparent. But those are pretty kick arse seats.

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• We are hurling towards Idiocracy, and I admit that I might be a part of it. (See above photo.)
• Yesterday we had a car explosion in Plano because of someone sniffing something and now we have the news that "Dry ice likely why Plano woman passed out" in her car.  
• Don't go to Plano?
• Actual headline of Fox 4 this morning at the bottom of the screen: "Crime Spree Stopped By Man With Pumpkin Carving Knife."
• On the radio this morning I heard a reference to a Disney "record" of scary music for Halloween. I think I actually had that record as a child. 
• I turned on Fox News last night and Bill O'Reilly and Barney Frank were screaming at each other. I actually turned it off. I was not entertained. 
• If something is wrong with my gMail account there is a message off to the side that says, "Something is not right." 
• Vehicles You Fear On The Road Ranking: (1) The double tractor trailer -- I saw a Fed Ex double trailer wrecked out in the median on our way to Abilene this morning, (2) The truck hauling cars - I always think one will fall off. 
• I told Mrs. LL this weekend that Grace Kelly is the most gorgeous woman in the history of ever. And then after a frantic pause I told her, "After you." And to think I gave marriage advice. 
• Speaking of, the Family House had the Internet go out but not the TV Internet feed for the first time ever. I went home to meet the tech guy yesterday who showed up (amazingly) in the window of time. I explained the problem, he does some tech stuff, and then looks at me and says, "This situation is weird. Let me hang around for five to ten minutes to check it out." Ummkay. 
• And now, for the first time ever, the audio on the TV does not work. I was looking at this morning and had to go to closed caption. What's the saying? That silence can be deafening? I laughed when Simon and Garfunkle's Sound of Silence began to replay in my head -- which has the crazy/brilliant lyrics of, "Hello darkness my old friend."