Very Random Picture

TCU graduates 38 student vets this semester. Nationally, 50% + drop out. Tonight--The local effort to improve #'s. pic.twitter.com/pv4oOmi72K
— Zahid Arab (@ZahidArabFox4) May 8, 2014

I did a doubletake. Is that Dwight Schrute?

I Cringed Big Time

And I had already read the "almost" shoots self.

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• The "open carry" nuts showed up outside a Jack In The Box in Fort Worth and scared the employees so badly they locked themselves in the freezer. That may be the worst PR campaign ever. 
• This is not an official Hot Sports Opinion, but I could see Johnny Football sliding to the Cowboys. (I heard yesterday that there hasn't been a quarterback as short as Manziel taken in the first round since the 1950s.) There would be no greater TV than to have the Cowboys "on the clock" with Manziel still on the board. 
• Hey, Nemesis: Colby Lewis. 3 2/3 innings. 12 hits. 7 earned runs. The rotation ERA has risen to 4.79, fourth-highest in the majors. "Say me name."
• Dallas Morning News columnist referring to his daughter: "Cussing's fine if we are connecting." And The Ticket's Dan McDowell said the other day that he didn't mind his young kids cussing in the house. Is there something going on here?
• So I'd tell Bernie to break his bond conditions? Nope. I'd just tell him that there is a very significant chance he'd be sent back to prison and that I've heard Costa Rica is very nice and secluded.
• Regarding that goofy carrying-a-half-million-in-cash will get you sent to prison case from yesterday: An astute reader pointed out that a stripper won a case last year where the government tried to seize $1 million that she had transported by vehicle. (And, yes, the very questionable dog sniffing evidence existed in that case, too.)
• "His father, Mickey, was murdered when Mike was 9." - The first sentence in the official NFL draft preview of Aggie wide receiver Mike Evans. 
• Looks like the Wise County jury did find that the guy was overcharged in the criminal case this week. They found him guilty of Evading With a Vehicle but not guilty of Aggravated Assault. I saw the video. It's a heck of an Evading case but not much else. (But I was afraid the jury would be so mad at him for driving like an idiot that they'd convict him anyway.) 
• I was curious what the ratings are now for Kidd Kraddick In The Morning now that it's been a year since Kraddick's death. I couldn't find anything. 
• Global Warming talk gives me Tired Head, but you guys sure do get riled up about it.
• I can't remember if Catfish O'Harlies was originally Catfish Charlies or Catfish O'Charlies before it was forced to change the name due to the fact that another restaurant owned the name. 

David Dewhurst Released Another Anti Dan Patrick Ad Today And It's Just Weird

It's a minute and half long, so it'll probably never make it to TV, but it was definitely released by the Dewhurst campaign.

And they apparently had a nasty debate this morning. There will eventually be some good audio from that.

That Guy Almost Needed His Face Reconstructed

And what's up with the gorilla mask?

You Gotta Be Kidding Me

People camping out at the Chick Fil A that is opening in southwest Arlington tomorrow. pic.twitter.com/2djZEE9xPq
— Anthony Andro (@aandro) May 7, 2014

OK, Conservatives, You Care About This?

Every Wednesday morning, Texas highest criminal court releases its judicial opinions. We had a doozy this morning. Two guys were in a truck that had a half million dollars in cash. No drugs were found. The case wasn't about whether the government could seize the cash, it's whether the evidence was sufficient to uphold a criminal conviction for "money laundering" (that is, the "proceeds were from the delivery of a controlled substance") which earned the driver an eight year sentence and the passenger with a ten year sentence.

Yep, we'll lock you up for that.

Big government? Over-reaching government?

Charles Barkley Thinks San Antonio Is A "Weight Watchers Gold Mine"

Kinda funny.

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts

• Last night, Fox 4 referred to the "affluenza" kid as "frivolous Ethan Couch".  I guess it makes sense, but I've always associated frivolous with wasteful spending. 
• And by the way, his parents didn't make a financial settlement (as reported everywhere yesterday), his father's liability insurance company made the settlement. 
• I thought the anti-Dan Patrick ads by David Dewhurst were fairly effective at first but, man, enough is enough. Could you thrown in a positive ad about yourself once in a while? He's going to screw this campaign up just like he did against Ted Cruz. Bank it. 
• Former Fox 4 gal Fiona has a new gig in San Antonio. Most reports say she split amicably from Fox 4, but I'm not so sure about that. I always thought she was great. 
• The subject of the movie Bernie (which is fantastic, by the way) was freed from prison while the courts review his conviction. For the life of me, I don't legally understand what's going on. And here's a piece of advice Bernie: The Texas Court of Criminal Appeals will send you back to prison. I'd head for the jungles of Costa Rica posthaste. 
• Whenever we tell the kids to hurry up, Mrs. LL and I will often end the sentence with: "Huge. Quickly." (That's what Tiger Woods told one of his mistresses when he was asking her to delete information from her cell phone. Yeah, it makes no sense, but it's funny. We've done it so much we don't even realize we say it any longer. )
• The Sophomore in the House turns sixteen today. Help us. 
• There is no one worse on the local news than Clarice Tinsley. That reading of Facebook and Twitter posts and that faux concern of hers drives me insane. 
• Richard Branson is cool. 
• Wise County's "Big" Ed Beckley is still planning to jump Snake River Canyon in a rocket bike (after paying the state of Idaho $1 million), but he has run into some issues.  
• A tweet from Fox News last night: "Monica Lewinsky says she was made a 'scapegoat.' Retweet if you agree, reply if you don’t." They should have added "Unfollow us if you think tweets like this are a waste of time and an obvious attempt to drive web traffic." 
• "Ask the NFL commissioner" on Twitter went about as well as you would expect. Funny. 
• Hey, baseball nemesis! You getting nervous yet? The Rangers pitching meltdown continues. Robbie Ross went five and a third, gave up 12 hits and 6 earned runs. It took a little longer to come to fruition, but it looks like I'm a Sports Predicting Genius once again. 
• There's a criminal trial going on in Wise County. It's an obvious Evading With A Vehicle case, but the jury will have to decide if the State has overcharged their case. They went with a charge greater than Evading. 
• Baylor had a promising receiver arrested for weed last Friday. I presume the ramifications, as they should be, will be small.  (Did you see on Monday's Ranger broadcast in Colorado, where marijuana is legal, the Texas broadcasters joked about the chance of getting high on cookies while they were there.) And TCU's Draconian reaction of kicking a bunch of kids out of school a couple of years back was beyond ridiculous (and I said that then.)
• The federal government released an 800+ page report yesterday warning of us global warming. I'm sure you'll all want to read it here.

Above The Fold

Is There Some Impending Capitol Invasion We Don't Know About?

DPS Launches Mounted Horse Patrol Unit at Capitol http://t.co/79dstM4Vx8 pic.twitter.com/XXdmGjwwLg
— Texas DPS (@TxDPS) May 6, 2014

They look like they expect the reincarnation of Santa Anna to come charging up I-35.

I'm Not Sure What I Expected, But I DIdn'tT Expect Them To Look Like This

DFW: 82-year-old Cleburne man arrested & charged with murdering his 87-year-old wife http://t.co/uzW3wyDwzH pic.twitter.com/dZ7MKPwd82
— FOX 4 NEWS (@FOX4) May 6, 2014

Monica Lewinsky At 40

And she's written an article for Vanity Fair. Not that I'm particularly interested, but she has been silent for a long, long time.

Internet Weather Report For Dallas From Sydney, Nova Scotia

[Staring at screen. Thinking of a comment. Giving up.]

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts

• I received an email addressed to "all major media outlets" (I'm apparantly big time now) from moveon.org to announce a protest at the Star-Telegram's office "to demand that they stop the blackout regarding the leaked drafts of the  Trans-Pacific Partnership (TPP).  We will protest this legislation and its turbo-charged twin, 'Fast Track' authority legislation, which our media have not publicized." I have no idea what that means.
• Radio guy Mark Davis said this morning that the new Benghazi hearings are being held with the purpose of (1) finding the truth, and (2) damaging the Obama Presidency and preventing a Hillary presidency. "We can't deny that," he said. Good lord. They are politicizing the death of four Americans? 
• "[O]ur public institutions belong no less to the Buddhist or Hindu than to the Methodist or Episcopalian.” - Justice Kagan dissenting yesterday from the Supreme Court's 5-4 decision to allow prayer before public city council meetings. 
• Mrs. LL and I watched Monster recently -- the 2003 film about serial killer Aileen Wuornos played by Charlize Theron. It's great. Once you watch it, go find this clip on youtube of an actual interview of Wuornos and you'll be stunned by how well Theron nailed the character. 
• Hey sports nemesis, another Ranger starter had a bad outing last night. They've gone 3-7 in the last 10 games. 
• My routine: The alarm goes off and I hit the snooze button. The Family Pup looks at me. Ten minutes later it goes off again and she walks on my chest because she wants her belly rubbed. I comply. Snooze button hit again. Ten minutes later the alarm goes off and she jumps off the bed because it's time to go outside. Every morning. 
• Obscure NFL Draft Fact: Houston owns the number one pick and most think they'll take Jadeveon Clowney  over Johnny Football. Clowney is 6'5" 265 lbs. When Houston took Mario Williams over Vince Young in 2006, Williams was 6'6", 290 lbs. That 25 pounds and the lack of motor on Clowney seems like a huge difference for a potential number one pick. 
• The requirement that drug companies disclose every possible side effect in an advertisement seems enough to discourage them from ever advertising. 
• I went to bed last night with Six Days Seven Nights on. Is David Schwimmer one of the worst actors ever? And Friends doesn't exactly hold up over time, does it? 
• Call back from We're The Millers from yesterday: Jennifer Aniston certainly has held up. 
• The Bag of Nothing guy just tweeted that he woke up with "blood running out of my ear". 
• The Clippers' owner's mistress telling Barbara Walters that she was his "silly wabbit" and Walter's reaction of "What?!" makes me laugh. I've got it cued up for you. 

The Family Cat is after you, buddy.

Me mind on fire -- Me soul on fire -- Feeling hot hot hot

Good grief. This summer could be bad. Over 100 to the west? On May 5th?

(And the goofy commentators who in the past were quick to point out that a one day cold spell proved that global warming is a myth, where are you? This one day heat wave is equally conclusive empirical evidence, right?)

Violent Video Of The Day That I Certainly Don't Approve Of

Hey, this thing is everywhere. It's actually part of an eight minute video which I already know I don't want to watch.

I'm pretty sure if the shovel didn't knock her silly that the land on the concrete did.

Edit: If you think this girl has died, you don't understand the Internets.

Goo Goo G'joob