Iowa Caucus: Meet The Dysfunctional Family

The Field Responds To Mitt Romney

Looks like a three way race between Romney and, yep, Ron Paul and, yep, Rick Santorum.

Edit:

Messenger Above The Fold

Kind Of Hard To Explain

I linked to the "Pedobear" appearing at the Penn State game in the Cotton Bowl yesterday, but I think I failed to appreciate the planning that went into it. Deadspin explains what it means and how the Longhorns were behind it.

And Fox 4's Richard Ray got in a pic:

First Pick Me Up Of 2012

Maria Menounos wishes Wise County A Happy New Year

The Tarrant County DA's Office Has Begun It's Public Shaming

"You have not pled guilty. You have not been found guilty. Yet, we will shame you not because we ourselves are blameless but because we have the power to do so. We are your government."

2011 "And Another" Winners

Texas: Yep, slow year. She's from Amarillo.

National winner: Carrie Shafer from Kentucky.

Honorable Mention: From New York

The Plan Is So Crazy That It Just Might Work

Do you have change for a million-dollar bill? Police say a North Carolina man insisted his million-dollar note was real when he was buying $476 worth of items at a Walmart. Investigators told the Winston-Salem Journal that 53-year-old Michael Fuller tried to buy a vacuum cleaner, a microwave oven and other items. Store employees called police after his insistence that the bill was legit, and Fuller was arrested. The largest bill in circulation is $100. The government stopped making bills of up to $10,000 in 1969. Fuller was charged with attempting to obtain property by false pretense and uttering a forged instrument. He is in jail on a $17,500 bond, and it isn’t clear if he has an attorney. He is scheduled to be in court Tuesday.

I'm dying to see a mugshot of this guy, but I can't find one. Any man who can stand at a counter and "insist" that a million dollar bill is real, has got to have eyes like Charlie Manson.

But, you know, there was a chance he could have pulled this off. I have this vision of some part-time Walmart clerk just counting out change in the amount of $999,524 and then Fuller just walking off with the cash into the parking lot like he just pulled off Ocean's 11.

And he also has something in common with Sam Hurd and his desire to be a big time drug dealer: If you are going to go, go large.

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts

• Everyone ready to get back at it? Anyone? Do I see a hand in the back? No? Ok.
• It's 2012 and I heard someone on the radio do a Forrest Gump impersonation this morning. 
• Oregon wore a mirror helmet in the Rose Bowl last night. I can't believe I'm saying this, but it was really cool. 
• Saw where The Fan's Richie Whitt was trying to get to Belize with his girlfriend over the holidays but the flight was overbooked. After the old auction trick didn't work, he and his travel partner where selected to get bumped off the flight. The were routed through El Salvador instead and arrived in Belize 24 hours later. Oh, and they were written a check for $1,300 a piece on the spot.  I think I'd do that deal.
• A beach "Hey, now."
• I always thought the next 10 years would be the "decade of travel" for me. Now I just need to pull the trigger. 
• I've had the weirdest pain in the front of my thighs over the last couple of days. It's like an exercise pain but it's the only place I hurt.
• My New Year's Weekend reaffirmed my belief that, "people are crazy." 
• An old (and funny) piece that The Onion wrote which reported that the Dallas Cowboys had "released" Jerry Jones started circulating again yesterday. I had a "bless her heart" moment when I saw one of my Facebook friends and her many friends were talking about it as being real. 
• I knew the Cowboys were doomed when the television cameras caught Keith Brooking doing one of his goofy "rah rah" speeches on the field before the Giants game. He rarely plays anymore, but I'll be glad to see him go. 
• Facebook pic of Slidell girl injured in accident over the weekend. 
• I had all the outside Christmas decorations down by New Years Day. Mrs. LL laughed at me because I drew a schematic diagram on the biggest box to tell me next year exactly how everything was hooked up. (Maybe it was bullet point #10 that read "There is no string of lights #4. Made mistake.")
• Rare chance to Baylor brag: The men's basketball team is unbeaten and #4 in the nation and the women's team is unbeaten and #1 in the nation. 
• There was a big strip shopping center built a couple of years ago along 287 in Decatur (its on the east side before the northbound 51 exit). It still sits completely empty and has never had a tenant. 
• Kathy Griffin took her shirt off in Times Square with Anderson Cooper on NYE.  
• And today the Republicans rely upon a bunch of Iowans to make some sense out of the mess that has been created.

Crazy Westboro Baptist Church Showed Up At A Game At The Cotton Bowl Today

I think I feel pretty good that they hate Obama. But, man, some of their signs are insane.

Edit: On a kind of related note, it would be hard to pull off a Penn State Scandal joke at the game, but someone did.

Random Monday Morning Thoughts

• ERATH COUNTY (CBSDFW.COM) – A 35-year-old man shot and killed his 3-year-old grandson before turning the gun on himself after becoming enraged on how his 15-year-old daughter was raising her child. Good grief (on so many levels).
• I saw there was a new TV series on NBC based upon John Grisham's "The Firm." And Fox has a new animated series based upon "Napoleon Dynamite." They are out of new ideas, aren't they?
• There were two babies that get the honor of being the first baby born in 2012. Both have Hispanic surnames. Have I preached politics and demographics before?
• Told ya the Cowboys wouldn't win.
• I couldn't believe that Jason Garrett began his press conference with "the process", "look at the tape" and "get better."  Those Cowboy fans want to hear something different. It's like the polar opposite of Tony Romo's "If this is the worst thing that ever happens to me" remarks from a couple of years ago, but equally frustrating.
• Mrs. LL got a little sick last night. I then got to proclaim to the Kids In The House that I just cooked them the best frozen pizza they ever had. (And it might have been since I checked it every 15 seconds.)
• Owner of Dallas Ghostbar found dead of apparent suicide. There are a ton of jokes about how the Ghostbar could prompt one to suicide but they would all be inappropriate.
• There's something oddly hypnotic of watching CSPAN's weekend coverage of presidential campaigns. They'll follow a candidate at a campaign stop, commercial free, and without commentary. Weirdly, you get to listen to all the small talk and handshaking. This weekend I got about 15 minutes of Mitt Ronmey's wife stopping by a coffee shop.  What a beating she was going through. 
• These holidays after holidays are weird. 

Cowboy Game Analysis

It's Midnight. Might I Suggest You All Begin To Plan Your Exit Strategy.

Those Mayans Don't Mess Around

Liberally Lean Bus Trip?

The rest of you guys can wait for Pink Floyd to get back together.  We're gonna party!

From Mavs Game Last Night

The audio on the clip  is poor but it's funny: "Oh my gosh! Did he take a bullet? Did it come flying down from the rafters? Is there a sniper?"

Look Out!

You get to see the crash landing at the 45 second mark. That could have hurt.

And From The Liberally Lean Traffic Center

This post would be better if I had a picture (or maybe it wouldn't).  We took I-35 up from San Antonio yesterday abandoning our plan to drive 281. What a beating.  Traffic was very slow to leave San Antonio and going into Austin was a nightmare. (I suppose that tollway around the city would have been a better idea, huh?)

Mrs. LL was soundly asleep (even through a gas stop) as we approached Waco. Finally, we were making good time despite thick traffic.  As I got to the crown in the road I was greeted by a ton of red taillights and smoke. I had time to stop, but it wouldn't be gentle. I even went onto the shoulder in anticipation of the person behind me not hitting the brakes in time. Safely executed.

That smoke I had seen had only been the remnants of an 18 wheeler locking up its wheels to avoid the suddenly stopped traffic. That wasn't the reason for the standstill, and no damage had occurred because of it. As we slowly began to move (and after Mrs. LL and I got into a minor skirmish because of my refusal to ever cross over a grassy median to avoid traffic), we finally made it up to the accident scene.

Oh, my.

I'll do my best here to describe it. It was in the inside lane and, if I had to be recreated, picture what would happen if there were seven cars and SUVs in a narrow tunnel traveling 70 mph bumper to bumper when the first in line slammed on its brakes. That's exactly what it looked like. They were perfectly lined up and vehicle after vehicle was crushed. There was one smaller car in the middle that had to have been reduced to 75% of its original length.

It was hard to tell, but I don't think anyone died. But the number of people out of their cars in addition to the police and medical personnel made up quite the crowd.  Up about 200 yards from the accident site there were two to three other damaged vehicles in the right shoulder which I suspect got damaged by cars dodging the pileup but still getting damaged. It was quite the scene.

I don't have any big moral to the story other than to think that if I had been up the road by a couple of minutes, I would have been right there in the middle of it. Good thing I had to go to the bathroom when I stopped to get gas.

(For the life of me, I can't find a new story on the crash. It was around Belton and occurred in the middle of the afternoon on Friday. Shoot me a link if you find one.)

Messenger Above The Fold

They didn't rank the top stories, but it's not a bad issue compiling the news of the year. They even had a "fun with numbers section." Did you know Wise County had 11 marriages occurring on 11/11/11? And if they only had "Random Girls" think what the number would be here . . .

Yep. Random Thoughtless. (Edit: Well, some Alamo Bowl thoughts)

• That was really fun last night. Insane. But fun. 67-56 was the final. 
• I'm in lobby that offers free breakfast. I had no idea that the Batton Death March crew was staying here. Long line. Everyone scarfing up stuff like they are starving.
• It's a nice hotel, but they allow dogs?
• The Riverwalk at Christmas is beautiful.
• I thought I saw Baylor's women's coach Kim Mulkey eating lunch yesterday. She glared at me for staring at her. Definitely could have been her. I made Mrs. LL go back and get a picture. I'll post it later. Edit: Here it is. Honestly, I think that lady maybe younger than Mulkey.
• We ate inside on the Riverwalk for lunch? Really. I pouted.
• The Aggies behind us last night were very funny. Young guys. Having fun. Their bit was to do a loud "growl" sound whenever Baylor did something well.
• That was like an Arena league game last night. I'm not sure I'm that proud to win it because I don't think football was meant to be played that way.
• But I'm still happy. 
• The drive down was traffic free. Amazing.
• I think I'll take 281 home since it's a Friday. 
• There's basically no police presence on the Riverwalk but everyone is well behaved. You'd think there would be incident after incident (how could you not push someone in the river during a fight?)
• Mrs. LL has never seen the Alamo. Amazing. We're going to run by it before we leave. Funny thought: Wouldn't it be a perfect reflection on government if they charged for it? No way.
• With Baylor being in town, I bet this is the most Caucasian the Riverwalk has ever been.

There were 17 touchdowns scored in this game. That's one touchdown for every 3 minutes and 31 seconds of game time. Baylor and Washington combined for 123 points (2.05 points per minute) and 1,397 yards of total offense. Robert Griffin had 350 total yards and 2 touchdowns and he wasn't even the best quarterback in San Antonio as Washington's Keith Price went for 477 total yards and 7 touchdowns. And his team lost! Then there was Baylor's Terrance Ganaway, who rushed for 200 yards and 5 touchdowns (as a team Baylor rushed for 482 yards). Of the 17 touchdown drives in this game, 11 took less than 3 minutes off of the clock.