Limited Pigskin Happy Feet

Bridgeport 59 Graham 27

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Sacred Heart	23
Alvord	20

I'd End Up Doing Something Like This

The interviewee is Robert Kennedy, Jr. whose dad was assassinated by Sirhan Sirhan in the 1960s. It's kind of hard to keep all those Kennedys straight.

Top Ten Hottest Local TV Women In Dallas

10. Tammy Dombeck, Channel 5 traffic reporter

9. Gina Miller, Channel 11 sports anchor

8. Dana Larson, Fox Sports Net Southwest sports anchor/reporter

7. Darla Miles, Channel 8 reporter

6. Susy Solis, Channel 5 reporter

5. Alexa Conomos, Channel 8 traffic reporter

4. Shelly Slater, Channel 8 weekend anchor

3. Karen Borta, Channel 11 anchor

2. Emily Jones, Fox Sports Net Southwest anchor/reporter

1. Megan Henderson, Fox 4 morning anchor As viewed from the discerning eye of Richie Whitt over at the Dallas Observer. Edit: Woah (I mean "whoa")! What?! No Lari Barager? What'd she do to Richie to be left off the list?

The Magic Of A Fall Morning

So before I got beaten down inside the Jack County Courthouse this morning, I got to wander through the pumpkin patch that local officials had set up on the steps. It was a nice moment as I got to appreciate the lovely fall morning. Then when I walked out after a mind-numbing communication failure with a court appointed client, I methodically smashed every one of them and proclaimed the Halloween was the "Devil's Holiday." The Jacksboro PD wrestled me to the crowd, handcuffed me, and then allowed local residents to taze me for $1 a piece as part of an impromptu Fall Festival. (The picture part is true. )

263-171

Well, they listened for one week. Which is one week longer than normal. Dow Jones reaction here.

Random Friday Morning Thoughts

• The debate was a big disappointment. Politicians are too good these days to screw up.
• But there were a couple of "heavy breathing" moments from Biden. And that lock of hair that covered one of Palin's eyes drove me a little nuts (and kind of jazzed me) there in the beginning.
• But both wore flag pins to prove they weren't radical muslims.
• One final debate point I stole from The Ticket this morning: Both candidates should have to wear shock collars so that once they deviate from answering a direct question they could be zapped with a pretty good jolt of electricity.
• If you're a long time DFW resident (and I mean loooooooong time), you'll be interested to know that former weatherman Warren Culbertson has died. I hadn't thought of him in 20 years.
• While you were sleeping: Wachovia abruptly broke up with suitor Citigroup and eloped with Wells Fargo.
• Lindsay Lohan is at the beach in Mexico with her girlfriend. Even I'm tired of seeing those pics.
• When Wells Fargo took over the old bank in Decatur, there were a ton of complaints about the bureaucracy that was implemented. (You'd stand across from a teller who had know you for 20 years but they had to see your ID.) But people got used to it.
• McCain has pulled out of Michigan. (Kerry won the state in 2004).
• Anybody else get the "hypothetical" email yesterday about why membership in a local church would be denied to a couple but that same couple would be welcomed in heaven after being run over by a Chaney truck? (Not sure why Chaney got thrown under the proverbial bus.)
• For two days in a row, I've had someone in my office come back to me and say, "Someone is up front and they want to talk to you about something that's on your blog." That will give rise to some brief tension. (Both times it turned out to be nothing involving violence.)
• Stock quotes no longer to be printed in the newspaper.
• I noticed Bridgeport finally received some votes for the 3A Top Ten football poll but still hadn't cracked the top ten. It doesn't help that the guy voting for the Dallas Morning News left the Bulls completely out. (Can't find that proof online right now.)
• In this month's issue of the Texas Bar Journal, they reprinted a funny deposition excerpt I sent in to the magazine in, gasp, 1990. A pdf of it is here. (And it reminds me of what a beating it was taking worker's comp depositions.)
• I learned that I was ever so briefly considered as the moderator for the proposed debate for the Wise/Jack County District Attorney's race between Gerald Hartley and Greg Lowery. That would have been great. First question: "Tell me how you feel about a gay woman who is considering an abortion so she can go fight the terrorists in Iraq."
• By the way, the debate was canceled when some basic ground rules couldn't be agreed upon. For example, one candidate wanted the other candidate to agree that he wouldn't mention his endorsements.

Possible Live Blog Of The VP Debates?

Trying to get this thing to work. We got techno meltdown right now.

"Quickie Vegas Wedding Ends in Bigamy Charge for Texas Man"

Let me get this straight. This man gets fed up with wife #3 so he marries his girlfriend in a quick and romantic little ceremony in Vegas, and now the great State of Texas is persecuting him? First you can't knock on a door in Trophy Club, and now love is apparently illegal in the Lone Star State. What in the heck is going on?

Montgomery said he filed for divorce that same month -- although it's unclear if it was before or after the ceremony at the Little White Wedding Chapel in Vegas. He said he had been separated from his third wife about four months. "I wish they would go after real criminals instead of people who fall in love," Montgomery said. "I know what I did wasn't right. But when me and Tiffiney met, I had never loved anybody in my entire life the way I love her. You can't find love every day like this. She is a wonderful woman."

Montgomery said he has been unemployed for five months and cannot afford to hire a lawyer. But he could not explain why he did not wait until he was divorced before marrying yet again.

"I wouldn't change nothing," he said.

This may be the saddest thing I've ever read. I've got half a mind to move my practice down to Waco to help this man pro bono so that he can share the kind of love with Tiffiney that only a man can share with a fourth wife. He's right. You can't find love like that every day. It's a hard road to get through those three good-for-nothing spouses before you can find the love of your life.

Can You Get Board Certified In This?

This is a blurry pic of the cover of a flyer (junk mail) I saw in the County Attorney's office a second ago. That's a whole book on the subject.

It's the Young Boy From Dazed and Confused

Or it might be the gal who is accused of killing her momma in Roanoke. (She finally made it back to Texas.) This is our first look at the little angel.

Decatur Rotary Club Providing Free Moonshine

Government building implicated. Local Baptists threaten boycott of something once they can think of what to boycott - call it "Demon Rum, but worse because it's free." Developing . . .

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts

• The Vice Presidential debate is tonight. I've decided Sarah Palin makes me tense when she talks.
• Republicans have every right to be up in arms that Gwen Ifill will be the moderator of the debate. (In case you missed it, it has been learned that she is the author of an upcoming pro-Obama book.)
• Highway 287 going into Fort Worth seems to be deteriorating at an increasing rate. It seems like there is a crew replacing a huge junk chunk of concrete almost every day.
• Sign that Major League Baseball has no idea what it is doing: If you live in Boston, your game against the Angels didn't start until 9:30 (and, heck, it might have been 10:30).
• The Dallas Morning News has an article about how MADD is excited about the possibility of legalizing sobriety checkpoints in Texas. The same old Liberties Sacrificed vs. Do Anything To Save Lives arguments can be found in the comments underneath it.
• I've gone from jogging on a treadmill to jogging outside. I started a movie (In Bruges) on DVD three weeks ago and it's in limbo until I get back on the treadmill.
• I bought Texas/OU tickets. And I'll be sitting in the Evil Empire section.
• All Oklahoma has to do is beat Baylor this weekend and Texas beat Colorado for both of them to meet the following week unbeaten and in the Top Five. Saturday may be the first time in my life I've rooted for the Longhorns.
• It's kind of hard to find pictures go at the top of Random Thoughts. As Bill Blazejowski said in Night Shift, I've got to "push all the way to edge of the envelope, and then bring it back a little bit." Edit: Some of you PREEE-verts out there claim that girl in the back is topless. I'm sending the pic into the lab for analysis. I'll get back to you on that.
• Had this email just pop up: "I am a pretty blonde girl, eager to meet an interesting man for some virtual chatting by email or Skype, or dates in reality!" Looks like I'll be a little bit busy today.
• Saw a news video yesterday of a man in India who dresses up as a monkey to scare off monkeys at a train station. Not a bad gig.
• The new First Financial bank at 51/287 in Decatur is in a good location. But the property next to it, which has been vacant since the Wise County Coop moved off of it over what seems a decade ago, is even better. Anybody know the asking price?
• Heard someone refer to the new Cowboys Stadium as the "Y'all Mahal." Clever.
• Phil King and Mike Huckabee were supposed to have some love fest in a Fort Worth hotel this weekend (and by that I mean a reception/fundraiser), but I never heard anything about it.
• It's always weird how this time of year that my my lawn stays green but stops growing.
• Tiffany is 37 today. And I know who Tiffany is.
• And "Pedro" from Napoleon Dynamite, one of the greatest actors of his generation, is 35 today.
• The George Foreman grill is a great invention. But you better scrape off the goo while it's still hot or you have some baked on goo for next time.
• If I were married to Kelly Rasberry of Kidd Kraddick fame, I'd spend all my time in a fetal position in the garage.

Senate Votes To Give Away Your Money, 74-25

"We should be able to get away with this. It's football season and they're easily distracted."

Hutchinson: Yes Cornyn: Yes Obama: Yes McCain: Yes Satan: Yes Marx: Yes

Trophy Club = Communist Russia

This gal looks vaguely familiar to me (wasn't she a "hey, now" about a couple of months ago?) but she's throwing down some Totalitarian Authority in Trophy Club. She doesn't want capitalism seeking, free enterprise embracing, flag loving Americans knocking on her door trying to sell her junk. Nope, she wants to be able for residents to sign up on a list which will prevent salesman from legally knocking on her mansion. I think the punishment is a trip to Auschwitz or fine, or both. Probably another big government loving Democrat who moved down her here from the north.

Weights and Measures

Based upon this guy's counting skills, I'm a little worried about the interpretation of "balanced" in that "Fair and Balanced" slogan.

This May Qualify As . . .

. . . the most uninteresting post ever, but I have been bugged. You see, I'm a creature of habit. I take the same routes. Wake up at the same time. Stalk the same women. Pretty much go to the same places. And always enter the same door of the courthouse. So I became confused when I looked down and saw this white painted line on the courthouse lawn that mysteriously appeared a couple of days ago. That lawn is always the same so this is the equivalent of a crop circle in the movie, Signs. Come to think about, there was a helicopter circling the courthouse square for a good hour yesterday. Something's up. Or that's the out of bounds marker for the new downtown golf course.

High Tone Southlake Couple Get In Boston Brouhaha

The story is here but those yankees write so fancy that it's a little difficult to follow. But it sounds like they had a little skirmish in their fancy hotel room in the middle of the night and the cops were called. Things went downhill after that. But you've got to like the paper referring to the misses as the "stunning stiletto-heeled wife." That, my friends, is a good wife.

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts

• Those kids that allegedly killed the lady in Roanoke (right next to crime free Trophy Club) were stopped in Yankton, South Dakota for curfew violation. They need a curfew in Yankton?
• I bet I haven't taken any prescription medication in two years.
• Did Kim Kardashian get booted off Dancing With The Stars last night. That's some big booty discrimination going on right there.
• Megan Henderson hasn't been on Fox 4 all week. And I don't have her tied up in my basement.
• Weren't we told the economy would collapse if the bailout bill was not passed last week?
• Whenever I get an email with "Fwd:" in the subject line, I begin to power down.
• At least two of three twirlers from Van High School were suspended after they performed to "I Kissed A Girl" at a pep rally. Well, after they were told NOT to perform to that song. I kept getting distracted by thoughts of Nutri-System while watching the story. (If you saw it, you'd understand.)
• Whenever a "suspicious package" is found, it turns out to a big bag of nothing.
• Do you think your life has gone terribly wrong if you get arrested in a cow suit? (Thanks emailer.)
• Saw a lady turn down a 3 year plea bargain offer only to get sentenced to 7 years after a hearing in Wise County yesterday during a probation revocation docket. (Dope case.) Some in the gallery thought it was too harsh. Someone else told me it was too light. I hate the probation revocation docket.
• And its always a weird sight to see someone in their regular clothes get escorted over to the "inmate section" of the courtroom (to sit amongst the inmates) because he or she is headed off to the hoosegow.
• Gov. Rick Perry said yesterday that he needs $24 million in taxpayer money to fight gangs. That man has impeccable timing on when to ask for a big bag of money.
• The O.J. Simpson trial sure if flying under the radar.
• Listening to Wade Phillips talk drives me insane.
• Whether it be worn out socks, underwear, t-shirt or whatever, it always feels weird simply throwing them in the trash.
• New poll: Nearly one in three homes in Texas speak Spanish. Heard a guy on the radio blame Dora the Explorer.
• In the Rangers "What Went Wrong Year Ending Press Conference", GM Jon Daniels said that the team needs pitching. You think? Really? (And this was being said as former Ranger John Danks pitched the White Sox into the playoffs last night.)
• When I've opened my garage door over the last few mornings, I've walked out onto my driveway and just want to stand there for about 30 minutes.
• It would be bad to be a pedophile. It would be worse to be a stupid pedophile: Randall Wolford gets caught in the To Catch A Predator scheme a couple of years ago when the show came to North Texas. Well, he's been picked up again. Do you think that's what his momma planned for his life when she took him home from the hospital and wrapped up in his crib?
• I always try to buy the same brand and style of socks. Prevents matching issues later on.