Little Slow Today

The County Attorney's office is trying to pull off a trifecta this week: Three jury trials in one week. Whenever that happens, I'm involved. Heavily. Yesterday they got a guilty verdict in a DWI trial with a defense lawyer I had never hear of. Today, I've got a case scheduled to go to trial (also a DWI) and on Thursday I'm up again. Today's case would be a great defense case but the video in the trooper's car didn't work. You would think that would help the defense, but it normally doesn't. The jury is much more inclined to take the word of the trooper when they don't have the actual video evidence to compare it against. I'll try to keep you updated during breaks and down time. Edit: 11:12 am. Jury selected. Four men. Two women. Not perfect but I think I have a fighting chance. Edit: Break for lunch. Trooper has testified. Cross-examination coming up. All this waiting makes me crazy as Ted Kennedy in Laredo. Edit: Well, it's over. Case dismissed by the prosecutor. And I'll give credit to both him and the trooper. Here's what the law is: An officer is allowed to use his police report to "refresh his memory" about what transpired during the DWI investigation. He may not simply rely upon the report if he has no memory of the incident. I noticed during the trooper's direct examination that he would rely heavily on the report - almost using it for all his answers. So, before the jury was brought in after lunch, I was allowed to ask him questions about what he actually remembered and what he was testifying about simply because his report said it was so. I'll give the trooper the utmost respect for honesty: he could not recall the details of how the defendant performed on the field sobriety tests. And it's not all his fault - the prosecutor had lost the DVD of the stop somewhere along the way so he couldn't use it to refresh his memory. (In their defense, I think this is the first time I can remember the CA's office ever misplacing a DVD.) And, in the end, the right result probably occurred. The officer followed my guy from Frilly's all the way to 380 (and other than "following too closely" to another vehicle briefly, committed no other traffic violations and didn't even swerve within his lane. (I even recreated his course of travel here but never got to use it.) And according to the police report, he was able to keep one foot in the air for thirty seconds during the One Leg Stand.

Monday Afternoon PIck Me Up

Brooke Hogan loves Chico.

The 19th Anniversary Of

I may be one of the few people that thinks Jerry Jones is a great owner. And I think most of the arguments to the contrary don't really hold water.

- Hated the way he "treated" Tom Landry? Sheesh, he flew down to Austin in his jet and told Landry face to face that he would no longer be the Cowboys' coach. What more do you want?
- He "meddles"? Sheesh, again. He hired Bill Parcells and gave him full control. And do we really know what goes on behind the scenes?
- He should hire a general manager who knows football? Heck, Jerry has done it for 19 years. If you spent 19 years in your current job don't you think you'd call yourself "experienced"?
- Jimmy Johnson is the only reason the Cowboys won three Super Bowls under Jones? Well, Jimmy went on to be a failure in Miami, tried to draft Baylor's James Francis instead of Emmitt Smith, and wasted a #1 pick on QB Steve Walsh when we already had Aikman.

Jerry spends money. Jerry wants to win. What more do you want in an owner? Look no further than Tom Hicks and the Texas Rangers if you want to see an owner who would be crucified if he owned the Cowboys.

Gotta Run To Fort Worth

But I think I'll take the scenic route through Saginaw because of this. Sounds nasty.

My Online Dating Video

[Some have suggested that this is fake. If this kid is acting, then we need to rip that Oscar out of the hands of Daniel Day Lewis and give it to him instead.] Edit: Maybe that wasn't that funny. I'm having comedy regrets. An alternative would be watching a bunch of senior citizens do a dance at the 45 second mark which might mean that the song said seniors are dancing to is officially dead.

Best Actress

Marion Cotillard accepts the Oscar for best actress for "La Vie en Rose."

I remember when the lines at the Decatur movie theater rapped wrapped around the block to see that movie. (Edit: I just have trouble with all W's]

NASCAR Is Not Fast

I really haven't paid much attention to NASCAR today but I knew they were in a rain delay earlier. So I flipped over a second ago (at 8:05 p.m.) to notice that the race was on lap 84 of 250. And I think this race started at 2:30 p.m! And I thought college football had some long games.

Before I Fall Asleep Watching The Oscars

Jon Stewart said in his monologue that you can determine your "stripper name" by combining your first pet's name with the name of the street you grew up on. That makes me "Prince Robin Hood." I'll take that.

And yours?

Rusty

The lawyer over Roger Clemen's right shoulder is Rusty Hardin - a former prosecutor in Houston. The first time I ever heard of him was when I to go to a Saturday morning seminar while I was with the Tarrant County DA's office. (Yeah, Saturday morning. I chose a government salary so I could go to seminars on Saturday?) Anyway, the guy was the guest speaker - he was funny, smart, and with it. (I still remember that he spoke of what was and what wasn't admissible during the punishment phase during a criminal trial - and that's been almost 20 years ago.)

He's also famous for cross-examining Anna Nicole Smith during one of her many court appearances over her desired inheritance from her very dead husband. After asking her if she had taken acting lessons, she famously replied, "Screw you, Rusty."

That's all I got. (Other than Roger might be in a little trouble.)

Weight Loss

The Messenger had an update this weekend on Robert Morgan who has now lost 207 pounds after undergoing lap-band surgery. Amazing.

And in a minor coincidence, I might have been thumbing through People magazine today and came across an article on the guy pictured above who has had gastric bypass surgery. He's lost 315 pounds. You might remember him looking like this in Varsity Blues.

It's 5:52 A.M.

Ugh.

Edit: Success. Time was 2:02:20 (which included stopping three times to tie my shoe - sheesh - and one bathroom stop - double sheesh.) Last year was 2:03:03.

Early Voting Numbers Through Thursday

I guess you can explain the huge Democrat turnout over Republicans in the GOP strongholds of Denton, Tarrant and Collin counties because of the contested Hillary v. Barack race. But in all of those conservative counties, the local races are all decided in the Republican primary which would be of equal incentive for Republicans to turn out. That's what's happening in Wise County, for example, where there is more early voting from Republicans than Democrats.

My . . . .

. . . myspace page.

And Now A Word From Our Drug Czar

From today's Morning News:

"What you are choosing to do when you consume these dead-end drugs, particularly marijuana, is you're choosing to buy the guns that kill people not just along the border, but throughout Mexico, guns that kill law enforcement authorities, civilians and threaten fundamental Mexican institutions," Mr. Walters added. "It seems not too much to ask these consumers who are making these people powerful, 'Is that something you're OK with?' "

Hey, hoss, are you "OK" with backing a stupid U.S. policy that makes marijuana use illegal thereby causing $8.6 billion (your number) to go to "ruthless Mexican kingpins" (your words)?

I Am An Island

The Star Telegram is on it.

(Thanks emailer)

Edit: I can't wait to find out how much King has spent on those WBAP ads because I hear them a krillion times a day. But one (two?) sentences in it has me confused. It says either:
(1) "A former police officer, he's stood up against illegal immigration."
(2) "A former police officer. He's stood up against illegal immigration."
Did he fight illegal immigration as a cop? Or as a state rep?

Horrible

Occurred on the Houston Street Viaduct - a roadway I jog over every Thanksgiving morning for the Turkey Trot.

From The Update

What happened to the days when a rabbit was just cute and furry and didn't have to be all tricked up with the latest and coolest tattoos? Nothing disgusts me more than to see a rabbit with one of those "ying and yang" tattoos on its lower back right above that cottonball tail. That, my friends, is the tell-tale sign of a promiscuous rabbit. And you know those rabbits are going to regret it when they get older.

Friday Morning Pick Me Up

Abigail Clancy loves her some Wise County. (Uh, the pick might enlarge if you click on it. Maybe a lot.)