"Do Da Heizman on Dat Ho"

I've got a new dance move I'm breaking out at Northside this weekend. Guys do it. Girls do it.

The Cowboys' New Stadium Looks . . . Cool

Teach Your Children Well

An instructional video to teach children how to act once dad arrives home (as it appeared on Mystery Science Theater 3000 - where wise guy comments are overlayed.) It's a little long, but funny. My favorite part: "With your own family, you can relax. Be yourself. Just be sure it's your best self" and "unemotional conversation helps digestion."

Let's Keep Those Dirty Illegals Out Of Our Country!!

Right? Because this is our country! Right? Well, here is part of the new immigration test - How well do you know your country? 1. What do we call the first 10 amendments to the Constitution?

2 The House of Representatives has how many voting members?

3 What Cabinet-level agency advises the President on foreign policy?

4 Who is the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court now?

5 What does it mean that the U.S. Constitution is a constitution of limited powers?

6 What is the current minimum wage in the U.S.?

7 What are "inalienable rights"?

8 Name one of the writers of the Federalist Papers.

9 What territory did the United States buy from France in 1803?

10 What is the tallest mountain in the United States?

Answers.

Ok, You Hardliners . . .

. . . how do you feel about a 17 year old Hispanic who gets drunk and makes "a pass" at a 12 year old? Do you think he should be "beaten, kicked, stomped, burned and sodomized with the plastic pole of a patio umbrella"? If you answered "yes", here's what could happen to you.

Bow To Your Sensei

Random pic I found when I googled "Decatur Texas" images.

My New Trial Suit

If it's good enough for Matthew, it's good enough for . . . uh . . . nevermind.

My Final Marathon Post

For the full marathon, there are apparently two huge hills that begin at mile marker 19. They have been dubbed "The Dolly Partons" by those that regularly run the course. (Insert childish giggle here.) This pic was taken yesterday at the beginning of the hills - A local resident decided to do some schtick. Ya think a huge question mark formed over that Kenyon Kenyan runner's head?

What Is Wrong With This Sign?

You know, I think I'm at least guilty of saying that. Source.

Let Me Bore You A Little More

Now I don't know what my time was on the half marathon. My "bib number" was 9157 but the results for that number came back to a "Barron Green" who ran a 2:02:43 (and "that person" was listed in an age division higher than mine). Today the results list a "Barry Green" with a bib number of 9158 who ran a 1:51:51 (and was listed in my age range.) I'm just gonna declare myself the winner and be done with it.

Paris Hilton And Her Sister

I'm very offended by this. So offended that I did not look [link fixed] at the other pics taken at the same time.

Sheesh

In looking over the Dallas Morning News at lunch I learned that Mayor Laura Miller ran the half marathon and beat me by four minutes. And then, depression set in.

Contrast

Seen a moment ago in Fort Worth: a poor lady beside a bench sign that advertised 'Upscale Resale' clothing.

This Kid

. . . a high school running-back from Cypress, TX has become a youtube.com phenomenon for a couple of runs this season. See them here. See a list of colleges that he is considering here - Baylor isn't on the list so he may be a legitimate prospect.

Covenant Marriage?

From the Star-Telegram:

Rep. Bill Zedler, R-Arlington, hopes to stem the divorce rate with a bill that would make covenant marriage an option for Texans, as it already is in three other states . . . .

Zedler's bill would allow couples to choose a covenant marriage, which is harder to dissolve than a traditional marriage.

Couples who agreed to a covenant marriage would have to undergo premarital counseling and get marriage counseling before filing for a divorce.

Unlike traditional marriages, which can be dissolved in Texas without either party admitting fault, a covenant marriage could be terminated only on grounds such as adultery, abuse or a spouse being convicted of a felony. Absent that, a couple in a covenant marriage could be granted a divorce if they lived separately for at least three years.

Anybody want to sign up?

At The Start . . .

. . . which was at the Victory Plaza (?) development, there were a couple of huge video screens which, I think, are always there.

Artists On My MP3 Player This Morning

I'm In Pain

I'm proud to announce that I didn't die and successfully completed my first half marathon this morning. (Although, as the clip above indicates, I will never be able to prove it since I will forever be remembered as "Barron Green" in the official records. Question: How does that happen when I'm the one that entered my name in the registration system?). Time: 2:02.43. Pace per mile: 9:22. Sore? You bet. Observations: - 13.11 miles is a long way - I really got light headed on the last three miles - When I passed the 8 mile mark, I realized I was now running a longer distance than I ever had in my life. A very odd feeling for a middle aged white guy. - Very interesting: 4,570 people participated in the half marathon of which 2,501 were female and 2,069 were males - There were a lot of those women that passed my by - Several times I thought to myself, "Hey, now!" - The event started at the American Airlines Center and you can't believe the amount of construction going on around it - The race began by winding us through Uptown. I ran right by an apartment I lived in exactly 20 years ago (at a rate of $350 a month) - The race is a huge event for those just watching - neighborhoods were lined with people cheering us on and holding signs. - My favorite signs: "Run Forest Run!" and one with a picture of Borat reading: "You run far. Niiiiiice." - The homes in the Turtle Creek area were amazing. The homes on Swiss Avenue were older but beautiful. - After the race, the AAC was opened up with free fruit, yogart, and (oddly) pizza. But that's not as odd as the free beer stand - There is absolutely no way in the world I could complete a full marathon