My Fifth Wife Always Had That Look For Some Reason

I'm Making This My Christmas Card

Canada Must Have Border Control Issues

The High Sheriff reports that he has crossed the US/Canadian Border (and sends this pic as proof). The formation of the Royal Wise County Mounted Police can't be too far behind when he gets back.

The Cowboys Almost Have Me Interested Again

But, man, that Martin Gramatica is a little guy.

Help Evangelist Benny Hinn . . .

. . . finish off the down payment on his Gulfstream G4SP jet called Dove One. He is seeking 6,000 of you to pledge $1,000. Really. Edit: You know, the more I look at this, the more astonished I am. Jesus would have washed the feet of those that checked the tire pressure on the jet, but he never would have stepped foot in it.

Racist, Bigot, Anti-Semite

If you ever wanted to see President Jimmy Carter called those words on live TV, here ya go. I think the caller was voicing compassionate conservatism, but I'm not sure.

Rome Is Burning

I'm not sure, but I think that "pie" was made of shaving cream. That will burn the eyes. The man is in pain. Good times.

"Bitter Blast"

Our High Sheriff, David Walker, is at a speaking engagement in Minnesota. He sends a couple of pics of the "Wintry Mix."

Just Liked It

The Dr. Pepper Big XII Championship Game Is Tonight

I thought you would want to know.

Cheerleader Carnage

Good times.

In Honor Of College Football Winding Down

I Don't Know Who . . .

. . . Minnesota Timberwolves' point guard Marko Jaric is, but I do know I had a better night last night than he did. Shorts on backwards? I can understand. Shirt? No way.

Buying . . .

. . . new tires is joyless.

I've Never Seen An Actual Line . . .

. . . being placed on the ground before the very deceptive Walk and Turn test is administered. But it didn't matter much for this guy.

I Love Free Speech Cases . . .

. . . and so does the Supreme Court who agreed to hear this case today. Quick facts: The Olympic torch was to pass in front of a school in Alaska. The school released the kids from class to watch the event, and one kid, a trouble maker after my own heart, decides to unfurl a "Bong Hits 4 Jesus" banner on the other side of the street - land that is off of school property. He is suspended (and this is the critical fact) because of the content of the banner (and for no other reason). To make matters worse, the school principal actually crossed the street and crumpled up the banner. He sues. The Supreme Court has now decided to determine whether his free speech rights were violated. Here's an interesting note: The school district is being represented for free by Kenneth Starr, the nutcase who was in charge of the Clinton impeachment. At least we now have a little insight into the man who was willing to waste millions of your tax dollars. Edit: A "cooling off" period has been declared for the comments. And, folks, can we tone down the language? (And, no, it's not censorship since I'm not a governmental entity.) Play nice.

Wouldn't Your Belly Still Be Cold?

Mariah Carey.

Fathead . . .

. . . is a company that produces huge wall art of various professional athletes that you can . . . uh . . . put on your wall. So far, they have been limited to players. But now they have struck a deal which allows them to do the same with three Dallas Cowboys' Cheerleaders. You can get Becca, Andrea or Nicole here. I just found my eighth, ninth, and tenth wives. And they will be very low maintenance.