"Richard, I'm Gonna Be Straight Up, I'm the Father"

I Got Married In That Outfit!

Gay Pride Parades are ... uh ... different.

Name Change A Consideration?

Link.

Just Wait Until "Snakes On A Plane"

The second Pirates of the Caribbean movie opened yesterday to a record toll of $55 million. No movie has made more money in a single day than that. Of course, you never hear about what the figure would be if justified for inflation. I paid $8.50 for a single ticket last weekend. It's a lot easier to get to $55 million at $8.50 a pop than it would be at $3.50 a pop twenty years ago. And I'm not sure I understand the fascination with Pirates of the Caribbean.

Random Saturday Golf Thoughts

- I promised I'd give up golf, but I've played four times in the last couple of months. It's kinda like crack - I played today with my good friend Joseph at Robson Ranch just south of Denton. - Robson Ranch is a retirement community that has spent a fortune on advertising over the last five years - The advertising has worked: there are a ton of homes in the community - Noticing how they all pretty much look alike - in a boring sort of way - I finally found one for sale along the golf course. For 1,500 square feet, it'll cost you $230,000. - I'm stunned at the prices of homes at Robson Ranch - I found a 2,300 square foot home for $320,000 - There doesn't appear that there is a much to do at Robson Ranch. - For every five golf shots I shank, one sweet one will keep me coming back again. - Golf is a four hour game. - If you show up an hour early to get organized and hit the driving range, golf is a five hour game. - If you hang out with your buddies after golfing, golf is a six hour game. - We were involved in a six hour game, and I think my friend's wife is very angry with him. - If you factor in driving to and from the golf course, golf becomes a seven hour game. - People cuss a lot on the golf course

Weird Stuff I Stumble Across

Last year there was a movie produced called "Paradise, Texas." It starred Timothy Bottoms (famous from the law school movie "The Paper Chase") and Merideth Baxter (from "Family Ties" who must have divorced "Birney"). I have no idea what the movie is about.

Juando

In case you were wondering where former Texas Ranger Juan Gonzalez is these days (that would be two time Major League Baseball's MVP Juan Gonzales), you might want to check this web page of the Long Island Ducks.

Laura Miller Calling It Quits, Part 2

This is a fairly interesting description of how the Dallas Morning News learned of the mayor's decision not to seek re-election. She kinda sounds like a queen bee.

Kelly Clarkson's New Look

Supreme Court Talk

The most liberal justice left is John Paul Stevens, and he is 86 years old. If Bush or, heaven forbid, a Republican successor gets to appoint his replacement, America would be changed forever. As The Washington Post said this week, "This is a court that could be a single vote away . . . from crippling affirmative action; curtailing, in not abolishing, abortion rights; [and] dramatically lowering the wall of separation between church and state . . . . " If you wake up one morning and hear that Stevens has died, the most important political day in the last 40 years has occurred.

Pop Culture Joke

Pamela Anderson in a bikini with her kids on a yacht in Monaco

Attend A Rave In Your Office - Before Noon

Pretty creepy. Stare at a bunch of moving lines on a youtube.com video and then look away when it tells you to. Stuff starts moving. Freaky.

I've Got The Exact Same Tattoos

The fact that Marquis Daniels of the Mavericks got traded is not interesting. The fact that this is what Marquis Daniels' back looks like is.

Eleven Secrets Men Don't Tell Their Wives

Secret #1: Yes, we fall in lust 10 times a day -- but it doesn't mean we want to leave you Secret #2: We actually do play golf to get away from you Secret #3: We're unnerved by the notion of commitment, even after we've made one to you Secret #4: Earning money makes us feel important Secret #5: Though we often protest, we actually enjoy fixing things around the house Secret #6: We like it when you mother us, but we're terrified that you'll become your mother Secret #7: Every year we love you more Secret #8: We don't really understand what you're talking about Secret #9: We are terrified when you drive Secret #10: We'll always wish we were 25 again Secret #11: Give us an inch and we'll give you a lifetime Source with a short explanation of each is here.

Car Talk

The Ticket discussed the greatest inventions in car accessories over the last 20 years. The nominees, in no particular order, are: - Automatic windows - Automatic locks - Cruise control - Automatic headlights - Rain sensored window washers - Remote car locks - GPS - DVD player for the back seat - The "beeping" sensor while backing if someone or something is behind you (I didn't know this existed) Cruise control may be at the top of my list. (And that's a pic of the new Saturn Sky.)

The Morning News' Steve Blow Wrote This

OK, get the mental juices flowing with this: Yancy Mejano, 24, the mother of the missing toddler [the little boy that disappeared in a park while her mother was in a truck with her boyfriend], testified yesterday that she met her husband, 52-year-old Gilberto Bercian, when he was dating her mother. And one of his grown children is married to Ms. Mejano's sister. So does that mean she is her own sister's mother-in-law? I'm confused. And clearly, so is this family.

And You Think I'm A Nerd

Some gal named Lesley Tellez writes about bars and clubs for the Dallas Morning News and its weekly magazine, Quick. That's her picture. She seems like a young, hip gal. Let me stress the word "seems". Here is some of her prose from her review (printed today in the DMN) of the bar "Tini" in Deep Ellum: But we didn't expect to see such a diverse crowd: middle-aged ladies who looked like they just came from work, a skater-dude with his hat to the side, a smartly dressed guy in a fedora, two clean-cut whippersnappers bobbing their heads, A Night at the Roxbury style. Most folks were chatting and doing their own thing. Did she say a guy looked good in a fedora? Did she use the term "whippersnappers"? We were getting ready to drink another X-Rated Tini [a martini]– mmm, grapefruit – when suddenly we heard it: The familiar opening strains of Chaka Khan's "I Feel For You." We yelled with glee and watched as a few other patrons broke it down on an impromptu dance floor near the door. "Broke it down"?