4.20.2018

It's Friday. Let's Get Out Of Here.

 On a scale of 1 to 10, I'll give her an E for effort. 

 Get me this . . . goat. 
 I hope the crowd is coming out to beat him senseless, but I don't think so.
 Life comes at you fast. 
I may divorce Mrs. LL for this woman.
And just because of her golfing abilities, of course.

This Is A Great Photo

For those of you who have ever followed high school level baseball or softball, you'll appreciate this photo. The joy of being "safe."

Random Friday Morning Thoughts


  • A few months back I said there was a First Amendment issue with "revenge porn" laws. I was taught that by reading what a Houston lawyer, named Mark Bennett, wrote. Yesterday, he won an appeal where the court held the Texas revenge porn law is indeed unconstitutional. Some people have commented that Bennett, who I have never met, is arrogant and a jerk. Let me say this: If true, we need arrogant jerks who are smart lawyers to protect and defend the Constitution. 
  • Rudy Guiliani is now a part of Trump's legal "team." He is an arrogant jerk but not smart.  This will not end well.
  • I'm confused, too:
  • Presented without comment: 
  • The only people who have ever blocked me on Twitter are hard right wing conservatives. But I'll always give credit to Mark Davis (radio), Robert Jeffress (shyster pastor), and Ed Bark (TV critic) for never blocking me despite me disagreeing with them. (And never mess with Ed Bark. He will engage and destroy you.)
  • That being said, everyone should consider giving up social media. 
  • Throw in that Texas congressman Farenthold quit because he used taxpayer dollars to settle a sexual harassment case, and this story becomes something right out of the National Enquirer. I present to you the party of family values: 
  • I'm all set to get my picture taken with Stormy Daniels tonight in Fort Worth but the club's website and Twitter feed says nothing about her being there. Is she still coming? They are still selling tickets via a third party but they are non-refundable. 
  • The Yellow Pages Directory was on my porch yesterday. It is a fraction of the size it used to be. If you advertise in it, you might want to rethink your advertising strategy. But I glanced through it to see the typical insane attorney ads. I found one from Tim O'Hare. He's the former mayor of Farmer's Branch which cost the city millions in his stupid immigration fight which they lost. And he is the former head of the Republican Party of Tarrant County. But he will come to the hospital to visit you!
  • Bet: Trump will never meet with the Kim Jong Un despite his "promise" to do so.
  • Yesterday was a first for me: A good person and county employee was obviously sick. I suggested she go home. She refused because she cares about her job and is loyal. The last time I saw her she was going home, and I hope she stayed there. 
  • Photo below: Christian values, family man, and conservative Fox News host Sean Hannity at a brothel in 1990. Remember when I said I hate hypocrites and liars? 
  • I had the funnest experience of my professional career yesterday morning. I represented two rappers who just happen to be black and from Wisconsin (yep, I'm confused, too). They entered a plea to a penny-ante marijuana case. They were the most respectful and gracious clients I have ever had. I could not get them to stop saying, "Thank you, Mr. Green" because they were scared to death what a small Texas county would do to them.  But having two black guys dressed incredibly cool with dreadlocks in the Wise County courthouse caused more crazy looks from other county employees than you can ever imagine. I loved every moment. 
  • There was a meeting yesterday about a "Veterans Court" for Wise County to deal with vets' issues when they commit criminal offenses. I'm 100% for the concept. But what about a "Poor People's Court", a "Previously Sexually Abused Court", a "Discriminated Hispanic From Bridgeport Court", or a "Police Officer Who Suffers From Stress Court"? There is a huge Equal Protection issue that will eventually take down any court which gives protection to one class of people over the other. 
  • Trump will not attend Barbara Bush's funeral. That honorable family hurt his feelings during the election.  #Snowflake



4.19.2018

Every Single Person Should Watch This



In the very, very near future, no one will know what is real and what is fake. (I know most want wish to play it because it is Barak Hussein Obama but it is not what you think.)

And with the dumbing down of America, this could get scary.

(I'll give BagOfNothing guy credit. He was all over this a long time ago.)

Presented Without Comment




Random Thursday Morning Thoughts


  • I really don't know anything about Garry Shandling and never watched anything he was in, but the one hour of the HBO documentary I saw last night, The Zen Diaries of Garry Shandling, is one of the most powerful things I've ever seen. It's about mental health. 
  • How does a walkout by students at Northwest's Eaton High School because of gun violence turn ugly by some dumb students bringing out Confederate flags?
  • I love the Dallas mayor. There was a hearing yesterday in front of the city council where Railroad Commission representatives were there to answer questions about the Atmos Energy gas line crisis. Of course, they didn't have a clue since they were unprepared government employees who are just collecting a check.  After being frustrated, he told them "I'm trying to figure out what our state Railroad Commission does for a living." (The Ticket always jokingly plays the theme from The Sopranos whenever they talk about him. He looked like a mob boss yesterday when he went after those incompetent people.)
  • I didn't know they were lost in 1960:
  • There is no weirder unsolved case in the metroplex than that of Missy Beavers. She was the woman murdered before an early morning workout class by someone dressed as a security guard. Her husband gave an interview about the case to KXAS where he said on the day of the murder he was coming back from a fishing trip in Mississippi and was in a car "for eight hours with . . .  this [the murder] on my mind with" he pauses "relatively no communication." Mrs. LL and I did the slow head turn to each other at that moment. KXAS was clear: "He is not a suspect."
  • What is going on?  Are these modern day money changers? Modern day Pharisees and Sadducees?
  • Speaking of. I'll say it for the millionth time: How the Board of Deacons of FBC Dallas has not fired this guy is a mystery. And the replies to this tweet are brutally true.
  • Stormy Daniels' lawyer is intimidating. If he ever gets the right to depose Trump, making it a pay per view broadcast would be the biggest money maker in the history of pay per views. And Trump is dumb enough to do it if he knew it was going to be on TV.
  • Spurs' coach Gregg Popovich's wife has died. Maybe that is why he is always grumpy in interviews. He knew something that was coming that we didn't. 
  •  I will always love his speech to the players in the huddle during a timeout in a playoff game. "Keep pounding that rock! Keep pounding that rock!" Meaning: It does not matter how hard and tough a rock is, if you keep pounding it you will eventually find the fissure and it will split. 
  • I mentioned last week that the courthouse is having upgraded outdoor cameras installed. They can see who walks in my office. Someone told me I need to install one on the front of my office building and point it at the courthouse and do a bullet point that says, "Now, I'm watching who comes and goes. And when." 
  • I'm now fascinated by the old white man's "thumb up" photo. From yesterday:
  • I got into a ridiculous Twitter fight last night about prayer, and it boiled down to this: The Bible tells us, in the words from Jesus no less, to pray in private. If you take the Bible at its literal word, you can't pray in public. (Pause right now and think about that.) But what if you obey God's Word by doing so, but you want to tell another person you prayed for them in private? Is this like violating the attorney/client privilege? Can you disclose what you told God in private? 
  • Some stranger chimed in on the Twitter fight and said that I "should pray someone doesn't whip [my] ass" for being a smart aleck. That's a pretty good comeback. 




4.18.2018

This Is Weird




But this isn't a tweet from a crazy Internet troll, it's a reporter in Pittsburgh.

Above The Fold


This is the revamped and free mid-week edition of the Messenger. Full front page is here. I suppose they would let me post the whole paper, but I haven't asked.

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts


  • The Southwest Airline engine explosion and related death is simply horrifying. I cannot imagine what it would be like to be on that plane. I can't imagine what it is like to be the husband of the woman who died after almost be sucked out of the plane. 
  • The pilot, who just happens to be a female, can truly be classified as a hero to get that thing safely on the ground. (And I say that with the firm belief that the term "hero" is thrown around way too loosely these days.)
  • For those of you who fly every now and then, look at this: 
  • Side note: If I think I'm going to die, I'm not taking photos.
  • A new trend I've noticed from watching too many Wise County DWI videos: Law enforcement has gone to using cell phones to communicate to each other instead of the traditional way over the radio where the public, if they have a scanner, can hear. I wonder why? (That's rhetorical.)
  • This is what is called "jumping ship." He is the worst DA in Texas and perhaps the worst in the history of Texas. 
     
  • I meant this to make this a bullet point yesterday. Putin owns Trump.
  • Trump's a "Spy"? And "more a Spy than he is"? He's losing it.
  • How's that Trump appointed Supreme Court judge working out for ya? 
  • Trump immediately got mad about it:
  • Barbara Bush was a national treasure. As is her husband. As is her son. I think I finally understand the Simon and Garfunkle song Mrs. Robinson which had the line of, "Where have you gone Joe Dimaggio? A nation turns our lonely eyes to you." 
  • Nice job from the White House for botching their acknowledgement of the death of Mrs. Bush.
  • "At the end of your life you will never regret not having passed one more test, not winning one more verdict, or not closing one more deal. You will regret time not spent with a husband, a friend, a child or a parent.” - Barbara Bush (1990).

4.17.2018

I Will Never . . .




. . .  be able to get Mrs. LL on a plane again.

(LaGuardia to Dallas flight.)

Male Chivalry





Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts


  • I used to see "public bids" in the Messenger whenever the county government was going to make a purchase of any significance. Is that no longer required or am I just missing it? 
  • Regarding the Vegas line of the number of season wins for the Texas Rangers, I told you to take the under. Once again, I'm a Sports Genius. 
  • I told you that if he didn't testify he would be convicted. Once again, I'm a Legal Genius. 
  • There's an appeal that has been filed in a Wise County criminal felony case. The briefs will be available online and, trust me, it's going to get tense. I'll keep you posted. 
  • The West, Texas explosion that killed 15 was five years ago today. Time flies. 
  • I haven't mentioned the arrest at Starbucks of the guys who happen to be African-American because I want more background facts. If a private establishment tells you to leave because you aren't buying anything, you leave.
  • A judge forced Trump's lawyer, The Dumbest Lawyer in America, Michael Cohen, to reveal the names of his clients yesterday. He had three. The last one revealed was Fox News' Sean Hannity. I'm giddy. Hannity, who has interviewed Cohen numerous times without revealing the relationship, is going to be fired. Then again, it's Fox News. Edit: Hannity made $36 million last year and he chose Cohen as his lawyer. 
    Once again, the old white man "thumbs up" photo
    Going to court. He has a cover over his umbrella.
  • The concept that you have to be paid as a lawyer in order for the attorney/client privilege to exist is 100% false. 
  • Cohen had more lawyers representing him at the hearing than he has clients. Side note: When your lawyer needs a team of lawyers you've got a bad lawyer. #MelCooleySchoolOfLaw
  • And the fact that Stormy Daniels showed up makes the Trump Administration an official clown car. 
  • How's that "Make America Great Again" working out for you? 
    So sad.
  • It's tax day.
  • The courthouse is getting new outside security cameras. If you work on the courthouse square, they will be able to see everything in high-def.
  • The University of Texas is going to expand their stadium at a cost of $140 million. And people struggle to pay to put their kids through that "public university." That couldn't be used for academic scholarships?
  • The "Night Court" judge, Harry Anderson has died at 65. 
  • Someone asked me why I don't run for chairman of the Democratic Party in Wise County in order to organize them and energize them. 
  • Mrs. LL and I watched the second episode of Green Acres. It is comedy gold. (Does Mr. Douglas wear a suit, white shirt, and tie throughout the entire series?)


4.16.2018

Ethics Hypothetical


This was proposed to me at the courthouse last week:

There is Suspect A and Suspect B. I represent Suspect B. A murder during a robbery was committed where Suspect B, my client, was in the "getaway car" and arrested. The cops don't know the identity of Suspect A who got away. Suspect B tells me, "I didn't know he was going to do that. I'm innocent. But I can tell you his name if it will help me with the prosecutor."

Now Suspect B unexpectedly dies.

There is a Crime Stoppers reward offered for the identity of Suspect A.

Does the lawyer for the dead Suspect B reveal Suspect A's identity? Does the attorney-client privilege prevent it? Could the lawyer reveal it and collect the reward?

My answer: No way I would collect the reward. But the question of going to the prosecutors and telling them who Suspect A is would keep me up at night. My now dead client wanted me to do that with the condition that it helps him when he was alive but now he is dead. Does that matter? What's the right thing to do?

This hypo comes from a movie I had never heard of. And has the great line of "I'm tired of trying to do the impossible for the ungrateful."

Random Monday Morning Thoughts



  • The great R. Lee Ermey has died.
  • The bombing of Syria is right out of Wag The Dog
  • Those familiar with the history of the Southern Baptist Convention, and I certainly am, know who this man is. Story
  • I had our big dead tree cut down and the stump grinded for $600. Mrs. LL set up the deal. She might be the best business person in history and not know it yet. It was "interesting" that the company that did it would only take cash. 
  • On Friday, Sarah Huckabee Sanders might have had the worst press conference ever defending Trump. She was sweating. Her hair was a mess. She attacked the FBI. And, oddly, when someone asked her an expected question, she would read from a script that was obviously written by someone else. Let me give her some advice: Walk away from that job. Now. 
  • Regarding Sanders and Trump constantly attacking the FBI, here's a flashback to 2016:
  • Art Bell has died. For those West of the Rockies, you have my thoughts and prayers.
  • My oddest moment of the weekend (and the year): I'm in Walmart. A guy, probably in his late 20s asks, "Does the name Tom mean anything to you?" At this point, I'm already irritated, but I'm polite and simply say, "No." He says, "I'm a Christian and sometimes I feel things. Is there anything I can pray for you about?" Me (in a CashMeOutside-HowAboutThat voice): "Nope."
  • Someone made this comment on Friday: "Barry doesn't care what you believe, he just hates hypocrites and liars." No truer words have ever been spoken. 
  • Unless they are looking at the forecast from the National Weather Service in order to repeat it, I don't believe this photo caption: 
  • I heard this on the radio the other day (paraphrasing): "We will not know the damage that social media is doing to our kids until 20 years from now. But perhaps the kids today, once they become parents, will be smart enough to tell the to simply 'keep off of it.'"
  • In some of the weirdest news of the weekend, Trump's lawyer negotiated a $1.6 million settlement for a Republican donor who impregnated a Playboy model. Then the donor issued a statement to apologize but candidly actually used the term "Playboy Playmate" as his paramour.  That's kind of like saying "I'm a bad guy" but I want you to know she was really, really hot. 
  • And more news about Trump's lawyer: He might have secretly recorded conversations and that's why his office was raided via search warrant. One may have been with his negotiations with Stormy's lawyer. He is truly the Dumbest Lawyer In America. 
  • Even George W. Bush wouldn't pardon Scooter Libby for lying. Trump did so on Friday. 
  • Me telling Mrs. LL, who just turned 40, that she needed to know Elvis died at age 42 led to a "What is wrong with you?" moment. 
  • I know Joel Osteen is scam artist, but I also think the same thing about the "Elevate Life" church. After watching Olsteen on Sunday, a commercial came on from their "pastor" Keith Craft who said they were "no longer on TV" after Olsteen's show and that the church had moved from Frisco to McKinney and are now meeting in a Middle School building. That sounds like a church going under. Anyone have any info?
  • He didn't testify as I said he had to in the Grapevine murder case. The verdict will come down today, and I'll bet the house it is guilty of murder. 
  • American Gothic. Pure Genius:
  • I watched the Andre the Giant documentary that just came out. It is fantastic.