4.06.2018

It's Friday. Let's Get Out Of Here.

Something like this happens to me every morning. 
Get me this dog!
I hope that was the driver and not the passenger.
This is probably fake, but I want to believe.
Get me this dog, too!

I'm Now Officially Worried About Newspapers




That park is in Philadelphia. 

English . . . Do They Speak It?




I would love to know what Fox News' base of older white men think about the clown act of Diamond and Silk.

Random Friday Morning Thoughts



  • Trump has been relentless over his criticism of Amazon (whose owner just happens to own the Washington Post.) What if the head of Amazon, Jeff Bezos, bought Twitter with his pocket change and then banned Trump? 
  • If that happened, it would make me initially very happy and then, later, very sad. Trump's Twitter feed is one of my great joys. 
  • We are all doomed. Count the red flags in this headline:
  • And another: 
  • You would think those living in downtown Fort Worth are hipsters. Turns out they are older, white, and rich
  • It drives me nuts when there are the constant comments about how the Democratic Party was racist pre-1960. That is, in fact, true. But the people of Texas and the entire South were Democrat dominated until 1980 when they switched to the Republican Party in the Reagan landslide.  The South simply changed teams. 
  • That is not to disparage anyone who runs as a Republican in the South. Regardless of your beliefs, you cannot get elected if you do not. At least for now.  (Wise County was slow to change. You could not win as a Republican in Wise County until the mid 1990s.)
  • The fact that our new puppy dog is in Pet Smart's "Puppy College" makes me want to question everything I value. 
  • The Texas Tribune has a story explaining why teachers in Texas can't strike because it is against the law. Trust me, they can. There is no criminal penalty but, yes, they could lose their jobs and benefits. Yet, if teachers organized en masse and walked out for a pay hike across the state, what's the State of Texas and/or local administrations going to do? Fire all of them and take away their retirement? No. First, their is no way to replace all of them. Secondly, those in charge would fear the political blowback for retaliating against teachers. The voting block of teachers, their relatives and friends is enough to destroy any politician. But a walk out would take courage.
  • The fact that it has to be explained what a severe weather "watch" is compared to a "warning" makes me concerned about the public.
  • Someone in Southlake got scammed by someone they met on Match.com and "was out over $200,000" and never met the person. That victim is not smart enough to have $200,000 in the first place. 
  • At the time that I'm writing this, Dennis Prager's book has plummeted to #77 on Amazon. (I had a guy up at the courthouse ask me yesterday who he was. I told him he was a radio talk show host on his third marriage who, as proof of his psuedo-intellectualism, gives advice in a "Relationship Hour" every week.)
  • Edit: Make that #87. But at least he is competing with a book called "Her Best Men":
  • I will always love this photo: 
    "But be on your guard against the yeast of the Pharisees and Sadducees.”
  • I went through "Bible Drills" as a kid. The Sunday School teacher would line us up as we all held a Bible. Then she would say a book, chapter, and verse and the first one to locate it in the Bible would win. I still remember this trick: Psalms, from a page count standpoint, is in the middle of the Bible. 
  • Trump will avoid the White House Correspondence Dinner again. What a coward. And never forget when Obama scorched him at it in 2011. I'm not sure he has ever been back. The man has not an ounce of humor in his soul. 
  • Secret: If you are on deferred adjudication for a Class C traffic ticket the chances of any municipality in Texas finding out that you got another ticket during your probation is less than 1%. (By the way, I've not received a traffic ticket since 1989. Mrs. LL, on the other hand . . . . )

4.05.2018

Sergio Just Went "Tin Cup"

He amazingly put five shots in the water.


Look At This Ridiculous Vehicle


I truly thought it was a joke. It doesn't beat the DPS Gun Boats on the Rio Grand, but that's a shameful use of taxpayer resources. It's Southlake for crying out loud. 

Random Thursday Morning Thoughts


  • A wreck on 287 this morning shut it down. This looks awful: 
  • Just a random restaurant in Fort Worth in a high tone shopping area I didn't know existed. People actually order and additional two ounces at $55 an ounce?:
  • RG3 is back after he signed a one year contract with the Ravens. The Redskins may be the dumbest team in the history of the NFL. They sold the farm to draft him, he ended up the Rookie of the Year but they chose to play him when he was obviously injured, and he ended up crumpled on the ground in a playoff game never to be the same. 
    Knees don't work that way.
  • Johnny Football says it was his employer's fault for not realizing he was lazy. Buddy, you'll never be back in the NFL: 
  • The New York Times  published a story a few weeks ago about how Jimmy Buffett doesn't live the Jimmy Buffett lifestyle at all. He posted this yesterday. That's not exactly a hippy on the beach (even when he does make it to the beach.)
  • After hanging around the courthouse for decades, I learned yesterday there are old showers in the County Court at Law #1 judge's office and the County Attorney's office. That area, I am told, used to basically be dorm rooms for sequestered juries (one side for men and the other side for women). Sequestration was apparently mandatory back then. 
  • I've begged for this for years: Does anyone have a photo of the Wise County District Court when there was a balcony? It had to look like the courtroom in To Kill A Mockingbird. 
  • Someone to me at the courthouse yesterday after noticing I'm carrying a paper notebook around now: "I bought my husband one which you can put in the microwave, and it will erase all the ink and then you can use it all over again." I'll be dang. It exists
  • I don't trust the "back up camera" in cars. But I do love the lines.
  • Watch Jack Nicklaus' grandson, serving as a caddy in the Par 3 tournament at the Masters but getting to hit the ball in front of his grandfather, make a hole in one. Good stuff. (It's a quick loading Twitter video and worth a few seconds of your time.)
  • That's funny: 
  • And Another: 
  • Last night Tucker Carlson had Dumb Face again. For the love of all things holy, close your mouth during an interview.
  • Mrs. LL has started a tradition of taking a "girl trip" with one of her friends every summer. She asked me where she should go this year. My answer: Marfa. I've never been there. 
  • I've never seen Giant.
  • I've railed against the Twin Peaks Biker prosecution from the start. The State of Texas has now given McLennan County a grant of $646,000 to help defray costs. So now everyone of you is helping to pay for a decision made by the dumbest DA in the state. (Once again, it is coming up on two years and not a single conviction and not a single plea bargain.)


Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts



  • Barry Horn, who has had a weekly column in the Dallas Morning News about sports media, has been let go. 
  • But as the newspaper business struggles, big government is living high on the hog: He takes first class trips at your expense. He stays in a condo in D.C. for $50 a night owned by an energy lobbyist. And now this. If you drain the swamp, you apparently get to replenish it. 
  • No one makes bad "dad jokes" more than Mike Huckabee. (No wonder his daughter, Trump's press secretary, seems so beaten down.)
  • Mav's Nerlens Noel is not a smart man. He reportedly turned down a four-year, $70 million offer from the Mavs last off-season and signed a $4.188-million offer instead so he could be a free agent next year. He was a bust this season and yesterday he was suspended for the rest of it for violating the NBA's drug policy.
  • Doris Day turned 96 yesterday. When I was in fourth grade, my teacher, for some reason, told our class that the actress was "old and gray."  I remember telling my mom about it when I got home, and she promptly told me my teacher was absolutely wrong. I had to do the math this morning, but Doris Day was in her late 40s at the time. (I might remember that event so vividly because it perhaps was the first time I learned that those in positions of authority could be wrong.)
  • We've had another military helicopter crash. In California, four are presumed dead. It happens time and time again. 
  • Dennis Prager and his one fan in Wise County were bragging about how Prager's new book was #2 on Amazon's best seller list on the day it was released. One day later, it was already at #43 and plummeting into oblivion. They have no idea how Amazon's algorithm works. #PsuedoIntellectuals (Edit: It is now down to #47 since I wrote this two hours ago.)
  • Martin Luther King, Jr. was murdered 50 years ago today. His dream has never come true. (On a lighter note, the barbershop scene from Coming To America where Eddie Murphy's character claims to have met "Martin Luther The King" still makes me laugh.)
  • The office of the disgraced and outgoing Waco DA released a naked photo of the wife of a "former defendant" in the Twin Hill Biker cases. It was taken off his seized cell phone and sent to "attorneys representing 177 Twin Peaks defendants as part of the discovery process." A judge had to tell the office to stop. Revenge porn? 
  • Sounds like there was a pretty wild hearing in a criminal case in Wise County last Thursday. I'm trying to learn more but, from what I've heard, I'm considering paying for the transcript. 
  • I will never understand why Bedford police immediately announced there was no threat to the public as they were investigating the case of body of a teen found in a landfill. Two months later, they arrested someone. Yesterday, the accused murderer was moved to adult jail. 
  • Never underestimate Fox News and some Republicans to speculate if they can find a way to attack minorities. Ron Howard voice: "No, she wasn't.": 
  • Trump now says the military will guard the border. That sure is a long, long way from "I will build a wall and Mexico will pay for it." 
  • "Special counsel Robert Mueller has told President Donald Trump's lawyers that the President is not currently being considered a criminal target of the Russia probe." For those celebrating, you might want to focus on the "not currently" qualifying language. How would you like a prosecutor to announce that you are "not currently" a target. I'd be nervous.
  • One of the Dogs in the House saw a possum on a fence last weekend. After the dog went crazy, the possum froze. The Freshman in the House asked if it the varmit was OK. Mrs. LL told her it "was just playing possum." Well played. 


4.03.2018

"They Paved Paradise And Put Up A Parking Lot"




Or, in Decatur today, they are demolishing a church to put up a convenience store.

(Thanks, J, for the pics.)

Caption This


What's Melanie thinking? What is the Easter Bunny thinking?

Houston Astros Had A Hard Time Revealing Their World Champion "Banner"

They decided to use leaf blowers to unveil it?

But I'll give the players credit for thinking it was funny.

And The Winner Is


And the worst are:

(And it just dawned on me I owe someone $50 from years back.)

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts


  • When's the last time you felt like it was freezing in the evening and then woke up to a 70 degree temperature?
  • Here's some advice to the "Affluenza Teen": Shut up. Don't give interviews. Lay low. (Which is basically good advice for anyone when the criminal justice system is after you.) And did her really drive off in a Tesla after being released from jail? 
  • Speaking of, any chance he is scared of his own FBI and Justice Department?:
  • I was at a driver's license hearing (DWI related) yesterday where the DPS lawyer called the officer as a witness first -- the only witness in the brief hearing. The defense lawyer then went on cross and asked just a couple of questions of the officer who was sitting across the table from him. DPS then rested and the judge asked the defense lawyer if he had any evidence. He said, "Yes, I'd like to call the officer." A huge question mark went over everyone's head (including mine) and he, I think, sensed it. So he said, "Well it was their witness and now I'd like to call him as my witness." Huh? 
  • The same lawyer after the hearing told the DPS lawyer, "I'll get back to you on this one. It's really interesting." Dude. The judge will issue a decision within two days and then the case is over. If you have any "interesting" evidence, that was the time to present it. You do realize the DPS lawyer isn't the prosecutor in the DWI case, right? 
  • Monday at the Masters where players skip the ball across a water hazard at the sixteenth hole is some of the most entertaining things you'll see. 
  • I once had an IRS agent show up in my office in Decatur, read me my "taxpayer rights", and then tell me I had been filing the wrong Employer's Withholding tax return form. I asked him if I had not been paying enough -- a legitimate question since he had traveled all the way to see me --  and he told me, "No, you have just have been filing the wrong form." That's still one of the weirdest experiences I've ever had. Once I filed the right form, I had a $5.00 refund coming. 
  • I can't imagine what it it is like these days to be a high school kid. I can't imagine what it is like to be a high school teacher. 
  • Nothing like a redneck song from 1984 to put you in position to beat an a Democratic challenger in Texas in 2018.
  • I'm not making this up -- This is where Rafael Edward "Ted" Cruz decided to start that re-election kickoff last night. I bet that was a very diverse crowd:
  • I thought U.S. Rep. Robert “Beto” O’Rourke, the Democrat who currently represents the El Paso area and is challenging Cruz, was Hispanic. I was wrong. Side note: Look at this: 
  • Mrs. LL has gone on a watching binge of The Office lately (which pretty much means I am, too.) I'll throw this out: The Office is greater than Seinfeld
  • Does anyone have a link to a guide as to how to grow tomatoes? Or, alternatively, where a farmer's market type stand can be found this summer where you can find home grown tomatoes?
  • Trump will do one of his insane tweets criticizing Amazon and the stock will go down that day. How much would you bet that someone in Trump's inner circle shorted that stock the day before one of those tweets because he tipped them off? 
  • I spent a couple of hours in White Settlement yesterday. It is far from a white settlement. 
  • That's a massive Oklahoma teachers' strike/protest which is going on. 
  • Villanova won the basketball National Championship last night. They won every game in the tournament by double digits. 

4.02.2018

I Give Up


Story.

People will believe anything on social media. No, that's not Emma. That's the Official Liberally Lean Girl having a bad moment a few years back.

And this comes after a fake photo started circulating of Emma tearing up the constitution.








One Armed Catcher




A Must Watch And Read For Those Who Care About America and Journalism

These are the Texas stations that the comrade owns:




Random Monday Morning Thoughts


  • Here's a question that neither dad or I could answer: Are the precinct lines in Wise County ever redrawn? And are they based on population? If so, you would think they would be redrawn every 10 years with the census. 
  • According to the Bridgeport Index, a customer's computer exploded in the Dairy Queen last week. 
  • Stephon Clark, the guy who was murdered in his back yard by police in Sacramento, was shot eight times with six of them being in the back according to an autopsy.
  • The cop who shot a Baton Rouge man at point blank range was no billed by a grand jury. Then the chief of police fired him anyway. He had been on paid leave since the incident in July of 2016 (which is a nice gig if you can get it.) 
  • For some reason, the federal government decided to prosecute the wife of the killer in the Orlando Pulse nightclub shootings. On Friday, they lost. Look at this statement from a former U.S. Attorney from South Carolina: 
  • Those pipe bombs found in Wise County made me think of this old story which gets more bizarre every time I read it. (I'm not saying they are related, it just made me think of it.) 
  • Even if you don't care about women's basketball, that UConn/Notre Dame semi-final was as good as it gets. Edit: I wrote that on Saturday as a draft. Then the championship game happened last night and trumped it. (Last shot here.)
  • This is from the Dallas Morning News on Friday in article about how housing is unaffordable for so many young people. I find this number shocking. The "D-FW area" is massive: 
  • Fox News' Tucker Carlson (who still has "dumb face" because he never closes his mouth) interviews Fabio about the politics in California. #Idiocracy
  • Baylor paid ex-coach Art Briles $15.1 million after his dismissal because of the school's sexual assault scandal. President Ken Starr got $4.5 million.  We'll never know what Briles knew. We will always know that Starr is incompetent. 
  • Trump's lawyer, the one responsible for this Stormy Daniels fiasco, graduated from Cooley Law School. It has often been referred to as the "worst law school in America."  A buddy of mine once referred to it as the Mel Cooley Law School. (You've got to be old to get the joke.) 
  • The head of the EPA has been living in an apartment for $50 a night -- an apartment owned by an energy lobbyist. And he only had to pay when he stayed there. You kidding me? (That's the same guy had been the focus of his first class travel -- including a trip to London at taxpayers' expense where he went to Wimbledon.)
  • I still love that the girls team from Bridgeport High School went back to the name of "Sissies" a few (many?) years back.  They were called that originally because the men's team was known as the "Bullies" -- not "Bulls" as they are now. If my memory serves me correctly, the girls were known as the "Lady Bulls" for a few years but that didn't make much sense. 
  • Trump hands me gold every day. This is too easy. The only thing more white is the Klan or the Proud Boys. Oops . . .  .Trump did throw in one token African-American and put him at the end of the row. I apologize. 
  • Ted Nugent on the Parkland high school survivors: "The lies from these poor, mushy-brained children who have been fed lies and parrot lies . . . . The level of ignorance goes beyond stupidity."  The good thing is they have no idea who he is. 
  • As of yesterday, twenty-three Republican Congressmen have said they won't seek re-election. Thirteen others have not said they won't quit but are running for a different office. 
  • Man, people are bent out of shape after the live performance of Jesus Christ Superstar last night.