Someone Needs To Marry This Girl Immediately



Boise State cheerleader gets crushed. Can't stop laughing.


8.31.2012

Bridgeport's Colin Jones Will Get To Hang Out With Cam Newton


Cue "Lights" by Journey.

Story. (Which includes salary info.)

Afternoon Pick Me Up


Britney, I'll never turn on you.

Cutest Thing You'll See All Day


Baby gorilla reacts to cold stethoscope.

Random Friday Morning Thoughts



  • The Clint Eastwood "speech" last night at the RNC was one of the most bizarre things I've ever seen. Who came up with that bright idea? There is no way that could be classified as "good" or even "OK". 
  • And I have to note that I brought up Eastwood's name here out of the clear blue about ten days ago, and today he's the most talked about man in America. I'm magic.  
  • Mrs. LL said last night that the only way the Eastwood performance could become more insane would be if he introduced a hologram Ronald Reagan. 
  • Mitt was Mitt last night. Good not great. 
  • Metroplex police killed another citizen last night, and this one sounds like it has some iffy justification.
  • Last night in college football had a guy return a fumble the wrong way for 58 years yards.
  • A middle aged man playing on an escalator at a Houston Texan's game last night had a worse night because he fell to his death
  • Mrs. LL repaired our scratched floors (damaged due to the doberman) yesterday.  It looked like she had tried to create an atomic bomb based upon on the different products and waxes she experimented with before finding the right combo. 
  • Former Bridgeport resident Michelle Simpson (Tuegel) has taken part in some incredibly high profile criminal cases in Waco. She's involved in one now
  • I, on the other hand, made a rare appearance in Justice of the Peace court yesterday. Kind of fun.
  • Out of habit, I stood every time I spoke. The judge told me to stop doing that.
  • The Longhorn Network is now on ATT U-Verse. I was beginning to wonder if it simply was going to die a slow death. 
  • The trooper in the stalking case in Tarrant County received probation. I don't have any problem with that. He might be a nut, but he didn't deserve to go to prison. 
  • Courtney Stodden turned 18 and promptly lost her mind.
  • Turned on the TV last weekend and got sucked into O Brother, Where Art Thou? What a fantastic movie. (Someone quoted from the movie this week in the comments. I bet they ran across it last weekend, too.)
  • The Decatur Eagles play Trinity Christian tonight. If you didn't know they were a private religious school, I wonder if you could tell simply by the way the team conducts itself.







8.30.2012

Get Me This Dog!



What happens at the 10 second mark would be repeated all day long.

(In other news, firefighters rescued a cat in Boyd this morning.)

Flashback From Last Week's Law Lesson


More.

Remember last week's video of the wise guy kid trying to bait the cop into arresting him for doing something not illegal -- carrying an AK-47? Well, Dallas cops might need a lesson (if the story is correct.)

But they are probably in the clear here . They certainly could have arrested him for Disorderly Conduct for waving the gun around in downtown Dallas. That's more than just carrying it. And the search after that arrest is legal so the dope charge will also stick.  But there is no separate crime of  "Displaying a Firearm". There is one for "Unlawfully Carrying A Firearm" but that doesn't apply here. That guy could have strolled down downtown with that weapon if he'd just done so calmly.

The Thought Of Almost Being An Official Liberally Lean Gal Must Have Got To Her!

Story.

Edit: TMZ has made a retraction! Hang on, baby! I'm coming to represent you!


Random Thursday Morning Thoughts



  • The Republicans better hope the Youth of America didn't watch Tim Pawlenty or Mike Huckabee at the convention last night. The "Dad Humor" was enough to send them running from the room. 
  • Mark Davis tweeted last night that the Republicans only lose presidential election when the nominee isn't conservative enough.  That is completely out of touch with political reality. A "strong conservative" can't win, and will never win again, even the Republican nomination. If the candidate is not a moderate, the Republicans stand no chance. 
  • Davis has also actually been speculating that Paul Ryan could be in the White House for the next sixteen years (eight as VP and then eight as President.) That's delirious thinking. When's the last time either party held the White House for four straight terms? 
  • Paul Ryan appeared on TV the other night and Mrs. LL fired off a "Hey, now!"
  • There will be a "mystery speaker" at tonight's convention. Speculation is on for Sarah Palin (no way), Clint Eastwood (maybe), a hologram Ronald Reagan (which would be brilliantly fantastic), and Tim Tebow (but for that game tonight in Philadelphia). Any other predictions?
  • The Republicans rolled out an African-American (Condi Rice) and then an Hispanic (New Mexico Gov. Susana Martinez) last night to seem more diverse. The latter proclaimed she was a former prosecutor of child abusers -- the cheapest political ploy on the books. 
  • It was funny last night when Paul Ryan introduced his family in the audience. The cameras turned to the family and his daughter had a friend sitting with her right in the middle of the picture. That friend scrambled out of there like there were bullets flying. 
  • Mickey Spagnola had a little trouble remembering what station he was on last night at the beginning of the Cowboys game. 
  • The Fourth Grader In The House has a select softball tournament this week. I saw the schedule. Good grief. After a couple of warm up games she plays a third game on Saturday which is the beginning round of a double elimination tournament. If they lose, the next game is at 8:00 a.m. on Sunday -- at a location one hour from our house. 
  • Cancelling the Aggie game tonight was spot on. Shreveport will be dumped on all day today.  North Texas at LSU in Baton Rouge is still a go for Saturday.
  • Watched Hard Knocks off of the DVR last night. Did the previous episodes bleep out the cussing but this one didn't? (And if you want to see a coach with less personality than Wade Phillips, check out Dolphins coach Joe Philbin.)
  • Random Facts Learned Yesterday: The Beatles last concert (in Candlestick Park) was composed of only eleven songs, lasted 33 minutes, top ticket was $6.50, and only 25,000 of the stadium's 42,500 seats were filled.
  • The ex-trooper harassment of his ex-wife case in Fort Worth is pretty bizarre. But before he was convicted yesterday, uber-conservative district judge Sharen Wilson almost threw out one of the charges for lack of evidence. 


Yahoo! News Washington Bureau Chief Has Had A Bad Day



A "hot mic" picks up him saying “They aren’t concerned at all,” in reference to the Romneys at the Republican National Convention. “They are happy to have a party with black people drowning.”

By the afternoon, he's fired

Anyone Missing A Pooch In Decatur?

"I think Courtney Stouder is crazy, too"

This doggie was found on North Church Street in Decatur on Sunday.  The "finder" has offered to bribe me with cookies from a local bakery if the owner is found.  Someone locate the owner for me. That way I can go home with a box of cookies and be considered thoughtful and kind.

Child Bride Of The Green Mile Guy Turns 18 Today

Dogs know crazy when they see it

They grow up so fast.

Random Wednesday Morning Thoughts


  • Watching the live reports at 9:00 last night from New Orleans, it looked like Isaac was a big bag of nothing. But it looks like it stuck around last night with some pretty bad flooding.
  • The worst of it appears to be some place called Plaquemine Parish (pic.). I looked it up on Google Maps (here) and my first thought was: "How can that place not flood?"
  • The Faith Bible Church in DeSoto, which has about a hundred cots set up for New Orleans refugees, had exactly one person in it last night. And a bunch of reporters. 
  • I watched a little bit of the Republican National Convention last night, but it was almost impossible to see any of the early speakers because all of the cable news channels had their talking heads jabbering. I finally had to resort to CSPAN.
  • During the Rick Santorum speech, 660 AM's Mark Davis had the most laughingly ironic tweet ever: "Libs saying conservatism is uncaring. Listen to this Santorum speech and then, pardon me, you have my permission to go screw yourselves."  Seems kind of caring.
  • I agree with the conservatives that MSNBC's Chris Matthews seems to have lost it. He's throwing out the Race Card like a crazy man.
  • Ann Romney seems like a nice enough woman, but I don't know if I would have had included in her speech her concern for the "parents who lie awake at night side by side, wondering how they'll be able to pay the mortgage or make the rent . . . ." Lady, those parents are so far removed from the life you have lived, there's no way you know that feeling.
  • I kind of worry about anyone who would want to be a delegate to a national political convention -- Republican or Democrat. 
  • In case you missed it: Troy Aikman's ex-wife was arrested for pubic intoxication a couple of days ago.
  • For the first time I can remember, I walked the last one-half of my jog last night. The temperature and near 100% humidity was just too much. 
  • From the Update, it looks like the City of Paradise is going to try and establish a city court that actually is used for the prosecution of traffic offenses (originated by a new "resident deputy" who will be hired.)  They also have allocated $1,000 for "legal consulting fees" which would only be used if a a case "went to trial". Translation: If someone demands a trial (jury or otherwise) in the City of Paradise, they have to have a prosecutor. So if everyone demands a trial, that fund will run out pretty quickly. 
  • Well I was completely wrong about the Aggies cancelling Thursday night's game. They'll now open their season against new conference foe Florida at College Station. Delicious. I actually looked on Stubhub for tickets but the prices were insane. 
  • The Tampa Bay newspaper does not appear to care much about the Republican National Convention taking place in the city:


8.28.2012

Random College Expense Graphic Of The Day


Not sure why they left out the Aggies. Maybe they can't park on campus because it's considered holy or something.

"Hubba! Hubba!"



This has to be from June, but I've never seen it. A San Diego Ball Girl snags a foul line drive against your Texas Rangers prompting the play-by-play guy to utter the awkward phrase, "That's the catch of the day! I mean . . . the girl caught the ball . . and . . . Lisa!"

On behalf of women everywhere (and Random Thought Girls), we shall rise up against such sexism wherever we find it..

Random Tuesday Morning Thoughts





  • Neil Armstrong's funeral is Friday. It is only fitting that there is a full moon that night. Really.
  • For all of this hype over Isaac, does anyone realize it is not even a hurricane yet? (At least as I wrote this.) The bang-to-hype ratio seems all out of whack on this storm. 
  • The more I think about it, the weirder those "conditions" on Dez Bryant's life are. There has to be something going on behind the scenes, and why in the world did the Cowboys make the conditions public? I wonder if they are setting him up to fail so as to save face once they cut him.
  • The Onion does a parody on the "And Another" phenomenon and, interestingly, they base it in Fort Worth. (Thanks, Keith.)
  • The Doberman scratched up our floor with his Freddy Krueger-like toenails. Mrs. LL promises she can fix it. I just stood there and stared at it. She just said, "Don't worry." She says that to me a lot.
  • Some are saying the Aggie/Louisiana Tech game (in Shreveport on Thursday) and the LSU/North Texas game (Saturday in Baton Rouge) are in jeopardy due to Isaac. I don't see that happening.
  • Mitt Romney's "birth certificate" joke last week didn't bother me at all.
  • But I did see an interview yesterday with Romney and his wife where she was bragging about how she bought him a three-pack of shirts from Costco. They might want to rethink that. The Rich Guy image is a better image than the Pandering Guy image. 
  • Times Square "crutches fight." People are crazy. 
  • I've had a strange two nights of "sleep". I'm having horrible dreams and wake up every thirty minutes. I then fall back asleep within five minutes and fall right back into the dream.  By three a.m., I was trying to force myself to think of something happy as I drifted off in hopes of controlling the dream. It didn't work. 
  • I asked Mrs. LL this morning if she stood in the bedroom last night and told me about a weird rash on her rib cage and then showed it to me. She hadn't. 
  • In 1974, I was kid on a Saturday afternoon watching a college football game on TV because it was the only thing on. Notre Dame and USC.  Notre Dame went up to a 24-0 lead shortly before halftime.  I then watched in amazement as USC stormed back to win the game 55-24. I kept looking around the house to tell someone about it but my mom wasn't particularly interested. So it was just me, the announcers, and the crowd at the Colosseum in Los Angeles. I sat there enthralled, and I've been hooked on college football ever since. 
  • Ten deaths are listed in the Update today.
  • A Bowie man is believed to have died of the West Nile Virus (pending state confirmation) but he was in the "Decatur Hospital." 



8.27.2012

Random Facebook Theft In Daylight Post


Friends and family! Please repost this message on your wall so that the pic will get out! Thanks in advance! Those who already done so thank you! The pic is of the truck and men that stole my welder out of my truck while I was at work at Lowes in Decatur Texas. Maroon with tan strip on bottom. Hub on right rear wheel is missing and it has chrome mirrors. If you know anything you can send me the info or the Decatur PD. police department phone number is 940-627-5100. The officer in charge is Robert Cain.

How We Almost Formed A Mexican Drug Cartel


As I was saying . . . .

On our Mexican vacation one day, we scheduled to go "deep" sea fishing. At the designated time, four couples showed up at the pier not far from our hotel only to see a boat that wasn't nearly as big as promised.  One couple, who are huge fans of getting exactly what they pay for, rejected the opportunity and negotiated a refund -- which was no small feat considering the captain and his first mate spoke little English, and didn't look like the sort of people which were familiar with the term "refund".

But soon the six of us remaining would-be anglers were off whereupon Mrs. LL and I immediately got sea sick and spent the better part of four hours laying on our backs and looking at the sky.

Until.

The other two guy passengers on the boat, I'll call them Guy #1 and Guy #2, became verbally excited and convinced the captain to circle back for something they had seen. A marlin in the water? Dolphin? Nope. It was a package -- probably 12"x6"x6" - bobbing up and down in the ocean.

"Oh, yes!" Guy #1 said. "I knew it!"

It was wrapped exactly how you would expect an abandoned drug package to be  wrapped -- a tight and water resistant cover with no identifiable markings.   The first mate leaned down, snatched it up, and immediately shoved it in a compartment in the back of the boat. I pictured it being dumped into the Gulf Of Mexico as the DEA was on the drug-runners tail.

I didn't think much of it other than "wow, that's a pretty neat story"  but did think  it odd that the first mate was so nonchalant about scooping it up with no interest in seeing what was in it.

Fast forward back at the dock when the trip was over.  No one seemed particularly curious about the package but I mentioned it to Guy #1. We thought we'd at least take a closer look so we walked to the back of the boat, he opened the tight container top, and I reached in and grabbed the package for a closer examination.  I didn't pull it all the way out but did lift it up enough so that the sun would hit it. Two things: I could barely see underneath the airtight wrapping and it kind of -- just kind of -- looked like money.  I wasn't sure because the first mate let me know in no uncertain terms (even in Spanish) that I didn't need to be touching that package once he discovered we were monkeying with it. I dropped it. Quickly.


Me reaching in the compartment to take a close look 

The "package" wrapped in brown sitting by a tiny dead fish. Overdosed, we guessed.

Ok, here's where it gets weird. With all couples off the boat while the crew cleaned the lone fish we caught, the rest of the party starts some crazy talk.

Guy #1:  "Man, if that's cocaine, that's a lot of money."

Me: "That's great, but I'm not walking around with a package of cocaine. I've seen Midnight Express."

Guy #2: "It may be worth a quarter of a million dollars."

Mrs. LL:  "(Longingly) Say that number again."

Me: "So what? Even if one of you guys was nutty enough to walk into a resort carrying a package of cocaine, what in the heck you think you're going to do with it? Take it to the front desk and exchange it for pesos? And another thing: Those two guys on the boat, I'm guessing, consider it to be their cocaine."

Guy #1: "No. No. No. I'm not talking about taking the cocaine. I'm talking about cutting a deal with them where if they sell it, we get a cut of the money. I mean -- we found it."

Guy #2: "And if we are ever going to cut a deal, we've got to do it right now."

Me: "And what are we bargaining with? I suspect their position is, 'It's our package'.  And you do realize this is Mexico and in Mexico they do chop people's heads off. For all we know they've got pistols on that boat and are part of a cartel."

Guy #1: "These guys aren't part of no [expletive deleted] cartel. They've just got this boat. They're gonna take the dope and sell it, and buy them a bigger boat. A really nice boat. I think we should try to negotiate our cut. It can't hurt to ask."

Guy #2: "And it may just be money. You said it looked like money. Maybe they'll split it with us. It can't hurt to ask."

Mrs. LL: (Who is silent but has been looking at me wild eyed like "think of something, fool!" ever since she heard "a quarter of a million dollars.")

Now, in all honesty, the conversation wasn't exactly like above but pretty dang close. I stuttered a lot more and kept looking at the shore for cops and then back at the boat and then back at Mrs. LL.

But here's where it gets wilder. Guy #1 manages to get an audience with the captain. I don't know what they were quietly discussing all by themselves, but I was officially out of whatever plan they are coming up with. I've got moral, legal, and ethical issues to deal with which wasn't exactly what I wanted to do on my vacation and, like I said, I really didn't want my head chopped off. Not to mention Mrs. LL's head.

Then Guy #1 announces that "we" and the captain were going to take the boat out to "the reef" (about a 1/2 mile away) and open up the package. That way, he says, at least we'll know what we're dealing with. I have no idea why the captain would agree to do this, but I know one thing. I'm not going. No way. Guy #2, however, is "in" and explains to his wife standing beside him on the dock why he is about to go out to sea with strangers to open a strange package. He can't get all the plan out of his mouth, however, because she pretty much is telling him that he has lost his freakin' mind.  Before she can officially pull out the Wife Card and tell him that no, he's not going, the boat shockingly pulls away from the dock with Guy #1 still in it! He's waving, but this was a heck of a surprise.

I can't begin to tell you what a wild visual scene that was. One of our fishing party is going out to the reef (presumably) to open up a drug package.  As the boat pulled away, we all looked at him in stunned silence like he was headed off to Death Row. He's still smiling like "it ain't no big thang." So picture that boat headed out to sea, getting smaller and smaller, as we squint to try and keep an eye on Guy #1 (who had on a bright shirt on). I was half expecting that shirt, with him in it, to be thrown overboard at any minute.

Mrs. LL, fearing foul play was afoot, snapped a picture of the boat's ID before
it took off to the reef.  (It's edited in case it actually belongs to a cartel.)

After about 10 minutes, however, they all came back. He hops out, we divvy up the tip money for the crew for the fishing trip, and the boat takes off.

"So what was it?" we all ask Guy #1.

"Marijuana. Nasty marijuana. That sea water had gotten to it. I let 'em keep it."

And they, apparently, let him live.

Random Monday Morning Thoughts


  • "First, I believe that this nation should commit itself to achieving the goal, before this decade is out, of landing a man on the Moon and returning him safely to the Earth." JFK, May 25, 1961.
  • Neil Armstrong, First Man To Walk On The Moon, August 5, 1930 – August 25, 2012.
  • I specifically remember that Summer of 1969 as a kid, looking to night sky, and thinking, "Wow. They are up there."
  • Changing gears, the "new rules" for Dez Bryant are insane. He's a 23 year old man being treated like he's 12.
  • The courthouse crew had our Fantasy Football draft last night. When we began a few years back, it was a small party. Now it's more of a "can we get this thing over with?" 
  • And at those drafts we are getting more and more, "Who's he?" after a player is picked. 
  • It's the First Day Of School this week for most of Texas.  And I suppose tears are flowing.
  • Speaking of tears, Mrs. LL watched some of all of Titanic, The Notebook, and the wedding episode of The Office on Saturday. 
  • But I fear I might was ruined that Notebook moment of "I wrote you 365 letters" because we both started to giggle about McKayla Maroney not being impressed.
  • I took the Doberman for a walk on Saturday morning. Or he took me for a walk. Good grief those dogs are strong. And I was praying he wouldn't see a squirrel.
  • 2016 Obama's America finished ninth in the country this weekend. Ok, that's impressive -- especially considering the number of theaters it is showing in. 
  • The shooting at the Empire State Building was bizarre in that all nine of the bystanders who were hit  were hit by bullets originating from the guns of the police. Also, the most gruesome photos of both the gunman and his one victim on the streets of New York appeared on the Internet within minutes. 
  • It's not Katrina, but it appears Hurricane Issac is headed towards New Orleans. 
  • Japan beat Tennessee in the Little League World Series over the weekend. That doesn't seem fair: A country playing a state. 
  • Late Friday a California jury awarded $1 billion to Apple in its patent lawsuit against Samsung. But get this: The jury had to answer over 700 questions.  
  • It's close to the NFL's final cut down day and here's the latest on the 49ers and Bridgeport's Colin Jones.