10.07.2006

It Only Takes A Spark . . .

. . . and then a ray of light appears on my very dreary life. (That's 3 overtimes for you following at home.) The Bears have risen. They have risen, indeed.

It's 2:35 on a Saturday Afternoon In The Fall . . .

. . . if a cold front had blown through, I'd have found complete true happiness at this very moment.

Trick Play

Football fans only: Arkansas had a very entertaining trick play against Auburn today. It involved a guy about as big as me. Video clip here.

Run For The Border

I think there was some news about the "Minutemen" in the Messenger this week (something to do with a helicopter crash). That group wants our border with Mexico closed so badly that they are willing to volunteer their time and effort to keep those would-be immigrants out. But I wonder what would happen if a liberal school like Columbia University had a group of Young Republicans and those Young Republicans were to ask the founder of the Minutemen to speak on campus. Well, I'll be. It happened this week. It did not go well as youtube.com shows.

Insert Gibberish Here

I've always thought the practice was fake and silly. And the Southern Baptists will never accept it.

Former Ranger Kenny Rogers . . .

. . . pitched like a man possessed against the Yankees last night.

10.06.2006

I Can't Stand It

I see something bizarre. I laugh. I think about posting it. I decide against it. And then I yield to temptation. (Those of you that would be offended by nature and turtles - yes, you read that correctly - should not click on that link. And for those that can't get enough, try this music version of the same clip.)

(Not So) Breaking News

We have had a plane crash near Slidell. Looks like the Messenger is doing a pretty good job covering it. Fort Worth Star Telegram story here. Channel 5 story here. (Including a crazy 28 photo slide show.) Channel 8 story is here. (Includes video)

Personal Message To Newspaper Guy

I don't know who you are, but you have a job that involves putting the Dallas Morning News in the coin operated machine across from the Messenger office. I normally pick the paper up there around noon. Here's my message: PUT MORE PAPERS IN THERE!!!!!! Half the time they are all gone and the other half of the time I get the last one. When you restock the machine the next day and you see that there are ZERO papers left over, the odds are very high that someone wanted a paper but the machine was empty!

Shake It Like

For the handful of you that are familiar with Outkast's "Hey Ya" from a couple of years ago, you'll get a kick out of this on youtube.com.

Grasslands = Less Liberty

If you suffer from insomnia, you read an opinion from the Fort Worth Court of Appeals that was handed down yesterday that held a United States Forest Service Officer, if authorized by his boss, may set up a traffic "checkpoint" to request "driver's licenses and proof of insurance, to remind drivers not to litter, and to inform drivers of proper safety gear to wear while hunting" on Lyndon B. Johnson National Grasslands. No probable cause or reasonable suspicion required.

10.05.2006

The People You Know

In the Dallas Morning News today, I noticed this headline with this opinion piece. I took a look at his picture and decided, yep, that's Bridgeport's own Allen Vaught. His biography on his web site is here. Ironically, he's trying to unseat incumbent Bill Keffer who I used to work with back in my insurance defense days in downtown Dallas. And Allen, a lawyer as well, worked briefly in Decatur while I was D.A. He was working on a court appointment case one time as we were negotiating a plea deal. I was impressed with him. But I still remember telling him, as we spoke of his incarcerated client, how "I expect a lot of myself but very little of others." We talked at length about whether that philosophy was good or bad.
Got My Attention Tonight
A big hit in the TCU game.

What The?

Quick story: In 1997 I thought it would be a great idea to invest $700 in Netscape which made Netscape Navigator, a browser software selling for $35 which allowed people to search the new thing called the Internet. Genius, I thought. Everyone will need the software to browse the Internet! Little did I know, Microsoft had invented Internet Explorer and had just begun to give it away. (Nice research on my part.) Anyway, the stock plummets. AOL buys Netscape. Time Warner and AOL merge. AOL is worthless so Time Warner gets rid of it. And I'm left with a stock now worth $328. I gave up on it six years ago. Here's the point: I bought the stock before online trading became the way to go. I have no idea how I found the brokerage house, but (I thought) they continue to send me statements of my failed stock. I finally opened one of the envelopes today and guess what: I am being charged a $35.00 "Inactive Account Maintenance Fee." (Scanned statement is above but still small.) A fee to manage an "inactive" account? So I'm mad at the brokerage house but, for the life of me, I couldn't remember how I had found them in the first place. But I also knew that their envelopes had changed a few years back, so I finally looked up on the Internet who exactly "SIPC", the name on my statement, was. OH MY!

I Do Not Understand . . .

. . . the fascination people have with this show.

He Resigned Over A Prank?

And just because you were IM'ing somebody who was fooling you doesn't necessarily make it any better. Drudge is here.

Uh, Oh

I'm sorry to announce that the police and local media have seized some of my IM messages. To do damage control, I'll release the following. BGStud1: So what up? FB4All: Nothing. Working. BGStud1: Me too. But I don't want to. So, what are you wearing? FB4All: Uh, what? BGStud1: Come on, describe it. FB4All: Well, kakhis and a dress shirt. BGStud1: Oh, baby. That's kinky. I was kinda hoping for that new skirt. FB4All: Uh, Barry. This is Bob. Your pastor. BGStud1: Oh, man. Sorry. Wrong IM. TTYL. Let's just keep this between us, Ok. Bless you. [BGStud1 has signed off] ------------------ Concept stolen from here.

I'm Scarred

Somebody mentioned this to me this morning at the courthouse: Apparently Rosie O'Donnell was on Nip/Tuck this week and had a ...uh....sex scene. Youtube.com has it now (but don't click on it if you normally yell about smut on TV because it is verrrry smutty.)

Criminal Confusion

I normally can read between the lines of any Texas story that involves the criminal jury system but this one has me beat. For the last 5 1/2 years, Montague authorities have been after Vickie Jackson, a former nurse, for the death of several of her patients. The trial was set to begin this week with the charge of capital murder but with the prosecutors not seeking the death penalty. These were the options: She would either be found "not guilty" or "guilty". If guilty, an automatic life sentence would be imposed and she would not become eligible for parole until after 40 years. So what happened? She pled "no contest" and was found guilty by the judge after a "brief hearing". So she gets an automatic life sentence and at least 40 year behind bars. Why plea? The only explanation was: " Her attorney Bruce Martin said Jackson, who has maintained her innocence since her 2002 indictment, pleaded no contest to avoid a trial because she did not want her daughter to be called to testify against her. Martin also said that Jackson felt it was important not to be convicted by a jury because she is not admitting guilt." Source. Doesn't make any sense. No lesser charge? No lesser punishment? Just give the State exactly what they want?

War On Drugs Comedy

A while back I posted a photospread of the alleged effects of meth on a young lady. (I would link to it but I'm too lazy to go find it.) Now someone has taken these photos and produced this.

Redux

A reposting of the famous lady punch. Google video here.

Weird

Google Blogger is acting weird this morning. Some of the old posts have floated to the top. I have no idea why. There's some recent stuff about four posts down. Edit: Comment4U figured the problem out. Summary: Youtube.com has a feature called "Post to Blog". One click, and here it appears. For the last week it hasn't been working. That is, until this morning when all of those failed attempts from days past suddenly appeared on The Blog.
Angry Professor
I struggle with whether it's real, but it sure seems that way (36 seconds only).
Aggie Squeeze
There's no audio on this, but this clip from Saturday's Tech game is all over the Internet. The oddest tradition in the history of ever.
MC Trebek
Brief clip of Jeopardy where Trebek has to read rap lyrics. Pretty funny.
Get Your Guns Up - Tech Wins

10.04.2006

Wise County, Gas and Septic Tanks

This is Fox 4 News' account of the gas pipeline explosion today in Wise County. It's fairly uneventful except for the "man on the street pasture" interview where we learn that most explosions in the county have to do with installation of septic tanks. Good times.

Famous Picture. Less Famous Death.

I was just a kid when this happened in the 1968 Olympics, but I remember being fascinated by it. The photo is making the rounds today because the white guy, Peter Norman, has died of a heart attack. He wore a "human rights badge" on the podium in support of the two "Black Power" demonstrating Americans.

"I'd Love To Slip Them Off You"

For those of you who need to be brought up to date on exactly what was said by Instant Messenger between ex-Congressman Foley and an underage male page, check out this reenactment on youtube.com which is both so funny and so wrong.

Alicia Silverstone

. . . who I really haven't heard much about lately, turns 30 today.

No Man . . .

. . . can suck the life force out of a team like this miserable guy. Thank goodness he's gone.

The Forgotten War

In the less than a week, 17 more U.S. families have learned they will never see their child again. Story.

If You Get Your News From Fox News . . .

. . . you aren't getting the news at all. This morning I was watching (ever so briefly) "Fox and Friends" as Brian Kilmeade was interviewing the new Republican candidate who will attempt to take Mark Foley's place in Florida. It was more like a campaign ad. But get this: Foley's name will remain on the ballot and the only way the new candidate can win is if the voters actually elect Foley. If that happens, the new Republican takes his place. How screwed up is that? But I did giggle when Brian asked, "So there is no way that we . . .uh. . . [insert awkward pause] . . . we, the people, can get your name on the ballot?" And Fox News three times yesterday put up a graphic showing the disgraced Foley as a Democrat.

"Me Loves Me Some Me"

I had heard that Terrell Owens had said that once. I finally found it (although his mouth and the audio is about a half second off - something that drives me insane.) But I think I'm going to put "Me Loves Me Some Me" on my letterhead.

Supreme Court Boring News

The Supreme Court opened today since it was the First Monday in October . . . oh, wait . . . The start of Yom Kippur on Monday delayed the opening one day. (Whatever happened to that church and state deal?) Anyway, the Court heard arguments this morning in a boring deportation case but the big news was that the transcript of the arguments was posted on the Internet before the afternoon was over. That is the first time in the history of ever. (Do not click on the link - it's a 45 page pdf file.) But people are already buzzing over Justice Scalia, as noted above, assuming that a Mexican who has been deported to Mexico is already drinking tequila. I, as a liberal, am offended.

The Man Knows How To Appeal To The Masses

Link. I would say that such a proposal is unconstitutional but with the way the Supreme Court is changing, I'm not so sure any more.

Changes

If you listen to the Oasis you won't anymore. Link.

Angry Professor

I haven't verified that it is real, but it sure looks like it.

MC Trebek

Jeopardy, the college edition, had Trebek throwing down some rap lyrics. I thought it was funny.

I Would Never . . .

. . . provide a link to a bunch of pics of Paris Hilton dancing in a very short dress. Never. Ever. Well, maybe just a peek.

I've Found A Place To Meet Wife #7

Thanks to the Dallas Observer Blog.

Not The Best Pic In The World . . .

. . . but I noticed this sign while I was getting gas this morning (right after answering 15 questions - credit? car wash? receipt? etc.).

Jay Leno?

A faithful reader said that Jay read something from our "local paper" last night. I didn't see it but I've got my band of 100 reporters on the case.